*holds the phone*

No, no, no, no! I was trying to let this sink into the backpages and then post very quietly so I could win for the rest of eternity.

*sighs*

I should have known that wouldn't work...nobody's won this thing for about 9 years...

*yeets everybody else off of the empire state building*

Scuttles how did I get to the empire state building in the first place? I was never there. So HA

I used my magical magic to teleport you all there first.

*yeets everybody off the empire state building again*

Sorry, Scuttles, something's the matter with the yeeting because I happen to be sitting very comfortably at my desk. The fact is, you yeeted this optical illusion that happened to look like me and is now wearing the crown, hoping to distract you from the Real Me. I'll be winning now, thank you~

*Dive bombs from the sky*

HA HA! My hiatus has protected me from your yeeting, Scuttles! And now I yeet you and Poinsettia when her comment shows up. 

*Yeets tremendously*  

*tries to win*

*unyeets myself* *snatches crown* *yeets everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY, whether or not they're on a hiatus, and not just their optical illiusions (but I'll also yeet the illusions just to be safe and make sure there's nobody pretenidng to be an illusion* *wins*

Ah, the wonderful Last-To-Post thread. How I've missed you!

Oh, what's that? Beau/Pierre--my zoodle who wears a beret and has a tiny mustache--says that I'm...I'm what? Ah, I'm winning. How delighful.

<pawzf!>

Paws? Hm. You don't have paws, Beau. 

Mwhahahaha

winning

Scuttles, your comment hasn't come out yet *grins wickedly* so... whatever it said, it doesn't count yet. I am winning :) (winning boringly, because there's nothing less original on this thread than saying "I am winning", but never mind.)

hello, world. i'm winning.

I am winning. I'm also being un-original.