Funny Things my
Chatterbox: Chirp at Cricket
Funny Things my
Funny Things my Friends Have Said, which is either number five or six. I know Abi usually does this but I couldn't resist making another one, since they always make me laugh. Also, I've learned to write down funny things my friends & family say.
"You DON'T need to tell me where my FACE is."
"I cordiallly invite you to play Assassin's Creed tonight...no wait, scratch that, I'll eat toast."
"You should dye your hair light black!"
"I hit Inara!" "No, you hit the chair, and will you STOP THROWING THE CHICKEN!"
"My goat supply is secure!!"
"We're going to a Hunger Games tournament." "REALLY?" "No, it's just archery class." "Aww..."
"Does technology include Oreos? Just wondering."
"Kylo Ren is a shiny crab that SINGS."
-that time when my friend Sarah was describing her plan to become a hermit and live in a hut in the woods, (out of her exasperation with humanity) and our friend Maggie overheard the conversation, made an indignant expression, and said "Did you steal my plan?" and then said "Well, we'll just have to have a hermit rivalry, then."
"DEATH PICKLES."
"Guys! We need to go and set up lawn chairs in the mall and get into wizard robes and sit and Avada Kedavra everyone who walks by, and see how long we can go before the police show up and detain us."
"You read E-BOOKS??" "Yeah...?" "I OFFICIALLY HATE YOU."
"It was REALLY good, although I'm sure you could poke a dozen holes in the plot with a toothpick"
"I ended up pacing back and forth until like 1:00"
"Miraculous Ladybug Is The Only Repetitive Show I Like."
"I'm quite chuffed about how these characters have turned out."
(February 16, 2018 - 4:47 pm)
(May 13, 2018 - 5:25 pm)
(May 17, 2018 - 8:38 pm)
An actual conversation I had once:
(Italics=my friend Normal text=me)
"There are different spots on your tongue for different tastes. Like sweet, sour, bitter, unagi..."
"Um, I think it's umami."
"That's what I said."
"No, you said 'unagi'."
"Yeah."
"Unagi is an eel roll."
*laughter*
(May 17, 2018 - 8:44 pm)
I have so many of these!!
"Mmm, pizza! *laughter*"
"See, if you just say 'roasted sweet potato', it's not funny. But roasted sweet potato emojis are hilarious!!"
"THE FLOWER IS THE INFINITY GAUNTLET!!! GET THE GAUNTLET!!!"
"I changed the color to yellow, the color of happiness!" (Sung quietly under breath during a game of Uno)
"Who the censored is Bucky?" (inside joke)
"A stormtrooper and a rebel just walked past each other without doing anything." (Said by my cousin while playing Star Wars: Battlefront)
(May 18, 2018 - 3:45 pm)
"Why does your bead have wings?"
"We're gonna have our own homemade canteloupes!"
"Abby worships England." (laughing) "I don't worship England!"
(Me) Child, how do you live?" (my friend)"I don't."
And that last drama class at my tutorial this year where Matthew said, "I went to my grandmother's bachelorette party." And then when Asa was saying that he might be dead but then again he might not be and stuff and it was great.
When my friend Cassandra and I ran out onto the big, windy field next to our church and we were in this crazy mood and it was cold and we yelled all sorts of crazy things, and she yelled "JOIN THE DARK SIDE!" To me and... yeah, it was just great.
(May 18, 2018 - 6:50 pm)
"Why does your bead have wings?"
"We're gonna have our own homemade canteloupes!"
"Abby worships England." (laughing) "I don't worship England!"
(Me) Child, how do you live?" (my friend)"I don't."
And that last drama class at my tutorial this year where Matthew said, "I went to my grandmother's bachelorette party." And then when Asa was saying that he might be dead but then again he might not be and stuff and it was great.
When my friend Cassandra and I ran out onto the big, windy field next to our church and we were in this crazy mood and it was cold and we yelled all sorts of crazy things, and she yelled "JOIN THE DARK SIDE!" To me and... yeah, it was just great.
(May 18, 2018 - 6:55 pm)
"PIZZA OF DEATH!!!"
"Okay, if you get nervous, think of Sebastian Stan hugging a husky pillow."
"I don't break people when I'm nervous. Usually."
"I could cut the power in the dance studio." "How about you cut the power to the entire building?"
"I have a crush on the Winter Soldier." "I have a crush on Captain America." *dead silence*
(May 18, 2018 - 9:17 pm)
"Hey. You know what would be awesome? If you got up at three in the morning and played Wordament and drink koolaid."
(May 19, 2018 - 12:59 pm)
"Hey, Luke, call me an idiot." "Liza is a stupid, @#$$$%@?":+&^^$ idiot." "OK, that's a bit too far."
"I am going to kill you all with sausages."
"I ate a shark one time. It was delicious." (it was an oreo Spencer manipulated.)
"You're wierd, Liza." "Thank you!!!"
"Want to read more, chickabiddy?"
"I'm dead meat." "OK, I'll bring chocolates to the funeral!" (I was known as 'ghost' to my soccer team from then on.)
"Oliver, I'm gonna put your guinea pig on top of your house."
"Eliza, stop putting wierd stuff on that paper!!" "...Yeah, maybe I don't wanna fail art."
"I don't like chocolate." "WHAT THE &*$# LOGAN ARE YOU HUMAN???!!!?"
"Really, only Oliver's butt could occupy that swing."
(May 19, 2018 - 1:30 pm)
I forgot some:
*Gavin and I see Eli coming to the lunch table* "HIS NAME I' JEFF!!!"
"PAPERWORK, MY DUDE!!!!!!"
"Nice work, Oliver, now the girls are gonna steal Timmy."
"My brain is a butt and my heart is a butt and my blood flows like a fart. That's why I'm so wierd."
"YO MART HOW U DOIN TODAY???!!!"
"Hey, who got the bat stuck on thier face?"
"...And there's a blue whoopie cushion in here..."
(May 19, 2018 - 2:00 pm)
Those are all amazing XD
...Banba said something innapropriate O-O
(May 20, 2018 - 12:01 pm)
YES. THE NO-CONTEXT-QUOTES.
My best friend and I have an entire channel dedicated to these.
Anyway, lemme send a few, because these come up quite a lot.
"WHAT IF OLIVER BECAME A TORPEDO? AAAAAP!"
"The floor is nice. The floor doesn't grab you,"
"Sorry, I didn't mean to drop Pippi Longstocking on you,"
"Oops, I stepped on Valentin's mustache,"
All from my best friend.
Not sure if it's allowed, but I say some pretty weird things too.
"Mom, I lost the coffee table!"
"For a matter of fact, my eyes are actually NOT microscopic!"
(May 19, 2018 - 4:11 pm)
Hey it's still going!
"Why does everyone want me to buy them cars?!?"
"--wears Zeon's first shark-tooth necklace, along with anyone purple--"
"Russian diplomats, Russion diplomats, Russion diplomats, yaaayyyyy!"
"I'm back! I got a lot done on vacation: I got a Zelda shirt, watched Black Panther AND Infinity War, and I started Justice League but couldn't finish it so we rented it today! Oh yeah, and we went to the Grand Canyon, but who cares about that?"
"I think zooming through the sky in a heavy metal tube with wings would freak me out."
"Oo. I've been immortalized."
"Ah, so when the T's were over on Monday, Sarah and Anne and I were up in my room combing through Sarah’s notebook for any characters who might resemble anyone in HP. Anyway, I turned on Pirates of the Caribbean music, because hah, PotC music, and then I remarked on what song was playing—“He’s A Pirate”. Sarah asked who was, and I said it was the name of the song, and then I said that Will Turner was a pirate, but only because his dad was a pirate, which I thought was stupid, but I also said that his dad was a crustacean. (Sort of. He has a starfish on his face, at least. But I’m giving out spoilers by the bucketful, so I’ll keep my mouth shut now.) And that led to…”His dad is the shiny crab in Moana!” “*gasp*” “HIS DAD IS KYLO REN!” (*Appropriate shrieking, which didn’t actually happen, I think*)"
"Yeah! You craft those mines, girl!"
"Oh good. I was starting to think you'd been eaten by cacti."
"Man, Navarog is really taking over all of our conversations."
"If she abruptly shuts up…if we don’t hear from her for years….we’ll know she’s…she’s died…..a horrible death, from over-exertion from Tappy dancing….." "Help, help, the tap dancing, it's - *ominous blood-curdling screams*" "Ooooh." "Very appropriate response to ominous screams." "Yes. Ominous screams…that makes me think of Scooby Doo. Which makes me think of ice cream, like a scoop of ice cream. Which makes me realize, it’s hot."
"I'M HERE, TREMBLE."
------
(May 20, 2018 - 12:57 pm)
A conversation my sister and I had last night:
"umm Liza what are you doing?" "Eating your feet." "Why?" "Because they taste good." "...They're made out of bacon." *muffled screams* "NOOOOO MY PIGGIES!!!!" "...You know they're not really made of bacon, right?" "Yeah, I know." *goes back to fake eating her toes*
other random stuff:
"Wait, so how many balloons did you pop before I got here?"
"So you can be chickabiddy, you can be gooseberry, you can be lunatic, and I'll be piddles."
"If you roll a one you have to do a fortnite dance, two run around in circles saying 'I am an idiot,' three you do the chicken dance, four and five you do a victory dance because your safe, six you have to run and fall on your butt."
"Yo, dude, we get to smash a bunch of old electronics!!!!!"
"'Explain a problem tge main character has and give them a solution.' Her problem is she prays to trees, I would tell her to stop praying to trees."
"It was so funny, cause earlier he got a squid stuck on his head!"
(May 21, 2018 - 7:17 am)
HOW COULD I FORGET???!!! LEVANA, PUNCH ME!!!
...No.
*sigh.* anyways:
"REVENGE OF THE MAC' N CHEESE POPTARTS!!!"
"STEPHANIE SNOTWART AND ARBALARBAGARF PORKBELLY GET MARRIED!!!!"
"(consessor sound effect used severall times) ... bye bye."
"MAC 'N CHEESE POPTARTS YOUR NOSE IS FRESH MAC 'N CHEESE POPTARTS PICK MY NOSE MAC 'N CHEESE POPTARTS- WOOOAAA- OOWOOAAA WAAAOOOO!!!!"
Yea, I'll just keep coming back to this thread. My life is full of extremely wierd people, including myself.
(May 21, 2018 - 7:29 am)