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Funny Things my
Chatterbox: Chirp at Cricket
Funny Things my
Funny Things my Friends Have Said, which is either number five or six. I know Abi usually does this but I couldn't resist making another one, since they always make me laugh. Also, I've learned to write down funny things my friends & family say.
"You DON'T need to tell me where my FACE is."
"I cordiallly invite you to play Assassin's Creed tonight...no wait, scratch that, I'll eat toast."
"You should dye your hair light black!"
"I hit Inara!" "No, you hit the chair, and will you STOP THROWING THE CHICKEN!"
"My goat supply is secure!!"
"We're going to a Hunger Games tournament." "REALLY?" "No, it's just archery class." "Aww..."
"Does technology include Oreos? Just wondering."
"Kylo Ren is a shiny crab that SINGS."
-that time when my friend Sarah was describing her plan to become a hermit and live in a hut in the woods, (out of her exasperation with humanity) and our friend Maggie overheard the conversation, made an indignant expression, and said "Did you steal my plan?" and then said "Well, we'll just have to have a hermit rivalry, then."
"DEATH PICKLES."
"Guys! We need to go and set up lawn chairs in the mall and get into wizard robes and sit and Avada Kedavra everyone who walks by, and see how long we can go before the police show up and detain us."
"You read E-BOOKS??" "Yeah...?" "I OFFICIALLY HATE YOU."
"It was REALLY good, although I'm sure you could poke a dozen holes in the plot with a toothpick"
"I ended up pacing back and forth until like 1:00"
"Miraculous Ladybug Is The Only Repetitive Show I Like."
"I'm quite chuffed about how these characters have turned out."
submitted by Leafpool, age Finite, This side of reality
(February 16, 2018 - 4:47 pm)
(February 16, 2018 - 4:47 pm)
(June 1, 2018 - 4:07 pm)
Once, when we were doing Cinderella, we were supposed to rip the dress off of Ella when the Prince puts on the slipper. She was sitting on it, and we didn't have enough time. The jester was going to put it behind a dresser but the lights came on too early so she just said "What dress?" and stuffed it behind the dresser in full view of the audience. Then there was another time when I was the Cowardly Lion for the Wizard of Oz. I came up with this hilarious idea to mew instead of roaring when I jumped out from behind the setting. I wasn't too sure about it tbut all of my fellow actors wanted me to, so I did. On one condition. They couldn't laugh on stage. So I was behind there, ready to jump out, and I did. I mewed! AND THEY LAUGHED. I was like NO YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO LAUGH, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO PRETEND TO BE SCARED!!! The audience laughed too. It was so great!
(June 1, 2018 - 7:15 pm)
"It's because of my geniosity."
"'Cause I've got KUH-NOWLEDGE!" (In-joke)
"Your children are soothsayers. They speak nothing but sooth."
*musically* "Oh, Joe was an Oscar-Meiner Wiener!" (Mis-pronunciation and all)
*British announcer accent* " This. Is the. BBC. Documentary. Channel. Visiting. The Nile. River. Which flows. Through. The land of. Egypt. In. This river. Are various large hippopotami, which, when they get angry at you, will stomp on your head, and you will be a little piece of paper, with two little eyes on. The top. You will look like. A frog. Oh, Egypt. Oh, Hippopotami. Oh, oh, oh. "
And there was a dream someone had, in which Donald Trump ran a hotel where you had to bring your own furniture.
(June 1, 2018 - 11:50 pm)
(When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer) *strikes intense pose, eyes narrowed* "Eleven. SIX!" This is a very old, very poor Star Trek reference we think is funny.
"Her bubble is skin-deep."
"Live long and happy." (Often uttered in exasperation)
"I'm trying to find Peter Jackson's place on Google Earth so I can go throw rocks at his house!"
"I'm obsessed with tattoos!" "Wait. Do you ever talk to the tattoos?" "No." (shakes head with the knowingness of experience) "You're not obsessed."
(June 2, 2018 - 12:17 am)
Esthelle!!! Hi! I haven't seen you for so long! *Tries to tackle hug Esthelle and Savvy at the same time and trips* I love all the quotes, too.
(June 3, 2018 - 12:52 pm)
*Awkwardly hugs back while secretly overflowing with felicitous giddiness*
Hi, Leafpool! It’s so very really truly nice to see a familiar name. I’ve been looking in a little more often than I have the past few months. Things have certainly changed! But then, so have I. It’s a funny old world.
(June 3, 2018 - 11:13 pm)
"Come on--No, don't stab Sam with a loaf of bread."
"Blue Corn Chip Herbery!"
"What do you mean 'Penelope' isn't pronounced like cantaloupe?
(June 1, 2018 - 11:03 pm)
IT ISN'T?? Well, I guess I kinda knew that. But still. I like the first one, too.
(June 3, 2018 - 12:47 pm)
"I deem this box worthy."
"Oh yes I am... because I'm BATMAN!!!"
"Fred likes potatoes."
"Logan, you've been cheating on poles!"
"I got accepted into Hogwarts, so byeeee!"
"I didn't get too far because then I started playing Battlefront 2, so yeah."
(June 3, 2018 - 3:26 pm)
I forgot- "No, I will not look at the cat!"
(June 3, 2018 - 4:10 pm)
Me: "Have you beaten Mashtooth yet?"
My friend: "NO I HAVEN'T BEATEN MASHTOOTH YET!!!"
"WHY I BEAT HIM IN LIKE A WEEK AND I WAS WAY BEHIND YOU!!"
"BECAUSE I CAN'T DO THE-THE-THING THAT YOU DO!!! I CAN'T PRESS THE STINKIN' Y BUTTON FAST ENOUGH!!!"
"I give up."
"Yeah, you probably should. One day when we're both like 80 I'm gonna come up to you and be like 'HEY GUESS WHAT I BEAT MASHTOOTH!!' and you're gonna be like 'Eh? Speak up!' 'cause we're so old we can't hear and don't remember to replace the batteries of our hearing aids."
"... Okay."
Legit conversation about the video game the Legendary Starfy. I beat it in about a week. It's taken her two or so years and SHE STILL HASN'T BEATEN MASHTOOTH!!
(June 4, 2018 - 1:02 am)
This one was actually me:
"You're never too big to be a colorful banana."
(June 5, 2018 - 8:04 am)
"It's broken who broke it a ninja hi-ya!"
"Wait, so you didn't do anything to it?" "No. I just had it in my hand for a while." "BLEH!"
"So. Many. SHAPES!"
"Alright, so, I spawned a bunch of villagers, then I buried them, then I turned them invisible."
(June 5, 2018 - 11:24 am)
A conversation I had with my brother this morning:
Jack: cause I'm LOKI!! Me: WHAT?! No, dude, it's because I'm BATMAN! Batman is way cooler than Loki! Jack: Yeah, but can Batman snap his fingers and make a whole world disappear? Me: No... Romeo can, but he's a jerk... (DC+Marvel+Minecraft Story Mode mash- up, if you were wondering)
Also, I recently said the phrase ' tree face'.
(June 5, 2018 - 1:21 pm)
" You will TREMBLE- BEFORE- MY FLOWER- OF DOOM!"
"AHA! YES! STICK!"
"... And this is the toilet... we won't discuss what we do here."
"Fed-ex, give us our pizza!"
"Yeah, could we go to war later? My army is sad."
(June 5, 2018 - 6:39 pm)