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Chatterbox: Chirp at Cricket
Funny Things my
Funny Things my Friends Have Said, because Leafy's one died but this idea is too good to not have a thread for. Post your funny things here!
-"YOU SAW ENDGAME? YOU SAW ENDGAME? YOU SAW ENDGAME? YOU SAW ENDGAME? *continued*"
-"Which joke is dirtier, Oliver's Cheetos or the fajitas?"
-"Keep it PG, we say *censored* here"
-"Rest in pieces, fidget pen."
-"Can you do me a favor and put a 'kick me' sign on Oliver?"
-"Captain America is just a 100-year old guy on steriods with a frisbee"
-"You're so disappointed by my lack of Super Mario knowledge"
-Gavin: Eliza is just a girl with messy hair and insomnia
Me: Hey that's not wrong
-"If I saw Dear Evan Hansen my soul would become a pile of goo on the floor."
-"You look like Shrek"
-"I think Logan just called me mentally weak"
-"Oliver should run the 666-meter in track!"
-"This confetti sucks"
-"I am SORRY I do not know what a METHANE HYDRATE IS-"
submitted by Soren Infinity, age 27 eons , BeaconTown
(April 27, 2019 - 11:05 am)
(April 27, 2019 - 11:05 am)
Is the 2nd to last one talking about The Lottery? I remember reading that in class last year. Definitely more than a 6.
(May 31, 2019 - 10:44 pm)
Ohhh yeah way more than a six.
(January 22, 2020 - 8:14 pm)
These two are from my French teacher:
"I just thought that was a really cute picture!! And then...we're going to learn about eating him."
"So, cabbage and body parts, right?"
(May 7, 2019 - 6:23 pm)
-Nabelist Terd
-"Move over you have a full butt of seat
"But I also have half a butt of window"
-"Tables n chairs. Tables n chairs. Tables n chairs. Tables n chairs. TABLES N CHAIRS. TABLES N CHAIRS. TABLES N CHAIRS. TABLES N CHAIRS."
-"Jegonnominate"
"No loggy our"
The only valid explanation: Tyberious and I should never be in close proximity. EVER.
(May 8, 2019 - 12:32 pm)
But you're sisters so I guess the world shall just have to suffer- WAIT WAS THAT OUT LOUD
(May 8, 2019 - 1:37 pm)
Whelp
-"THE GREAT FWUMP IS UPON US"
- "gIvE mE mY sOcKs BaCk"
"nEvEr!"
"then PERISH" *throws pillow*
I typed more down on my phone but can't look at it now, I'll post them later.
(May 9, 2019 - 12:57 pm)
'We have killed 5 whales already! Don't kill more of them!"
"This is like applesauce.. with some cheese mixed in."
(May 14, 2019 - 2:52 pm)
"We might have to throw it in with the salami and hope for the best."
(May 16, 2019 - 8:39 pm)
- "Augustus Gloop was the first emperor of Rome?"
- (teacher) "I have PANTS that are older than ANY of you."
- "Ava was singing the Queen Of The Night aria and I was too scared to function!"
- "I'm dying. Dying of death."
- "Gabe is such a BEAN PLANT sometimes!"
- "We have to kidnap Cooper to write music for us and be DABULOUS!"
- "Baritones must be a different species."
- "Are you gonna cryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?"
- "Because SONDHEIM!!!"
- "My favorite part of Endgame was when Shrek fell from the sky and sat on Thanos!"
And that is it for now. XD If anyone wants context, I can give it to you, just ask! :D
-EG <3
(May 17, 2019 - 7:21 pm)
That last one is the GREATEST XD
(May 18, 2019 - 9:26 pm)
Yes. XD I would love context for that.
(May 19, 2019 - 7:51 am)
"You're suspended from pretzels for the rest of the week!"
(May 18, 2019 - 8:29 am)
Me: Can I eat the rest of your pizza?
Friend: Sure. It's way too cheesy for me.
Both: *burst out laughing*
(May 19, 2019 - 1:42 pm)
These are from my lit class
E(before we are going to watch a movie in class)- May I off the lights turn?
A-I'm pretty sure Ms. J lost a brain cell when she heard you say that
Ms. J-Oh don't worry I'm used to losing brain cells when E talks. Like when he asks me if he can go visit the pee pee dungeon
Ms. J- EE, get Big Boi off the table
EE- But he likes it there
Ms.J- I don't care he's giving me anxiety. And I can't see.
EE as he moves him off: Sorry Big Boi...
*Context* Big Boi is what we named EE's giant bright red backpack after Ms. J asked EE to take him off of the table so many times she thought he deserved an identity
Ms. J- *opens Big Boi* Ah! There's a fifth grader in here!
E(speaking in a Kermit voice while reading Henry the Fourth)- Your money!
Ms. J- A, you better not be on the dark web buying weapons
A- *looks up with wide eyes and speaks in Russian accent* No, definitely not buying weapons. Why would you think that?
(May 21, 2019 - 8:36 am)
*stuck up tone* I would much rather be a dinosaur.
Is it weird that I'm saving my scab to look at under my microscope?
(my answer) Not at all!
(May 21, 2019 - 9:43 am)