Hiatus/ half-permanent le

Chatterbox: Chirp at Cricket

Hiatus/ half-permanent le

Hiatus/ half-permanent leaving..~

I dont feel like the cb is the same place I used to know...

before it was a place where i could be me, be different people...

I'll tell you now...

I was Crescent. 

I was Girl On The Island. 

And I don't want to hear a word about it.

Yes, I know. 

I posted weird stuff.

But that was me. 

And I like it. 


Why am I taking a hiatus? 


2. I feel like....people....are poking fun at me...I feel like i need to move on to another place. I might still be here...lurking in the shadows...but that's for me to know, and for you to find out. 

3. The CB just isn't the same place, I guess. Before it seemed so accepting, but the 2 comments on my name change thread were essentially just comments saying that it wasn't 'right' for me to change my name so frequently

4. I just don't feel welcomed in general.


Why am I half-leaving? 

Because of all the reasons above.

Because, even though y'all have helped me so much, it's time to travel on the path. 

"Light...doesn't exist, without dark. Dark...doesn't exist, without light. In every dark, dismal situation, there will always be a shred of light." --Me 2021

*nervously laughs* I guess I'll see y'all around! The Computer solo write thing will still be continuing! 


submitted by themysticw0lf
(April 3, 2021 - 12:26 am)

Aww, I’m so sorry that you’ve felt that way :( I promise, I get it. On a different website, I had ten names over six months. I got kinda beaten up for that, but my names just didn’t feel like me until I discovered NiteSkiies. Don’t feel like you’re ‘bad’ or ‘messed up’ or ‘wrong’ for doing that. You’re you, and you are great. *bear hugs* Oop, I forgot about COVID... *bear hugs anyways* *sends a billion magical star cookies* Have a great journey on the path :)

With Care and Love, NiteSkiies

submitted by NiteSkiies, age Immortal, Floating with the Stars
(April 3, 2021 - 9:41 am)

Hi, Nightfall. I'm going to call you that for this post 'cause that's the name you had the longest and when I think of you I still think of Nightfall.

I think it ... really kind of... hurts, that you felt like you had to hide under all those pseudonyms. And the fact that you were Island and Cres-

Was the Goddess of Death account on NaNo yours or your cousins?

Night, I love you as you are. I loved you as you were. I love you and loved for who you will be and for who you have become.

You need to know that we love you for who you are, not because you are different people. I love you as you, not as Cres, not as Island, not as Song, not as the fireworks person I can't remember the name of. As you, Spirit, Nightfall, Nightfall DreamFire, NDF, NightSky, Star NightSky, SNS, and now, themysticw0lf. I love you as you, Annie, Lumos, Nox, and Shadow. I loved Cres, as Cres. It's really, really shocking to me that you were the same person. I can't really wrap my head around it right now, honestly.

Acting like you're different people is a) hard for me to keep up with, and b)... I don't know, it sort of makes me feel... betrayed? Which makes no sense. 

But like, it feels like a betrayal of trust. Ish. That's not a perfect description, and makes no sense. Yeah, I obviously don't trust you with my last name, address, phone number, etc., just 'cause I don't know you irl, but I did trust you with my identity, and I understand that you mightn't have felt comfortable sharing yours.

I don't care if you change your name, but I do care if you pretend to be several people at once. If you want to go under several names, fine, but you need to say (like Song did) "I'll be going under (for example) the names Crescent, Girl on the Island, and themysticw0lf depending on how I'm feeling," for instance. "I know that might be confusing, but it is what makes me feel comfortable." I'd be fine with that! But to me it feels like you're keeping secrets from us. Like you're spying on us, in a way. Like you're playing us, like we're all just pawns in an elaborate plan, sort of, even.


Kitten, Hazel, and Writing were not saying that it was "wrong" to change your name so many times. Kitten was pointing out that every time you change your name here, we have to change how we think of you in our minds. It's, yeah, just like changing your name irl. Which is a big thing. So she was requesting  that you treat it like a big thing here, too. I still think of you in my head as Nightfall, honestly. I thought of dreamii as Heroes for a while after she changed her name, and Aza as DG, and Fallen as Lizardo- it takes a really long time for me to get those things straight in my mind, and what kind of friend am I if I can't even remember your name(s)?

Third (or maybe fourth, can't remember and I don't feel like counting hah), I'm so sorry that this community feels less welcoming. I haven't been noticing that, but if I've been contributing to it, I'm really, really, sorry. I get that you need to move on from this. Don't forget we love you. <33

Fourth, good luck on the science project! It sounds stressful. *hugs* Here's a motivational cookie and some positivitea. *hands motivational cookie and some positivitea* You can do it!

This is getting really long, sorry, but I guess I just want you to know that I love you as you are, not for being different people, and although it kind of hurts that you were different people without telling us, that fact hasn't changed: I still love you as my friend, for being who you are, for being who you were, and for who you will become. I'll miss you a lot, but I understand that sometimes we have to move on. I'm so sorry if I've contributed to you being unwelcome, and Kitten, Writing, and Hazel did not mean that changing your name was "wrong". I promise. *sends hugs and love*

*hugs again* 


submitted by Luminescence, age 12, Atlantis
(April 3, 2021 - 9:48 am)

I agree with this 100%. You put things into words so well.

submitted by Azalea , age 14, The art studio
(April 3, 2021 - 2:39 pm)

@Aza, thanks :)

@themysticw0lf- one more thing I had added but I feel like I didn't make clear enough. I don't have a problem with going under several names depending on the way you feel- I think that's cool. what bothered me was that you didn't telli us. Didn't say, "Hi, I'll be going under different names depending on how I feel: ____, _____, and _____ (etc.) I know that might be a little confusing, but it is what makes me feel comfortable. I just wanted you to know that if you see any of those names, they are all me." I don't have a problem with you changing your name lots of times either, but I just want you to know, especially, that Kitten, Writing, and Hazel definitely weren't trying to hurt you. that doesn't make it better, but... I want you to know I'm not mad. You're a wonderful person, Nightfall, and I'll miss you lots. Please drop in on Valentine's!

submitted by Luminescence, age 12, Atlantis
(April 3, 2021 - 6:02 pm)

I'll miss you too, Lumi! Of course I will, I'll try to at least! 

Sorry...a lot of things slip my mind. 


submitted by themysticw0lf
(April 3, 2021 - 10:23 pm)

No...the Goddess_of_Death account was made by me, though! I have a Chinese cousin...she's literally my best friend. In addition, I accidently sent her my password and stuff...

She got into my account and caused some mischief, that's that.

I'm really sorry, it's just that I...

Well, I kind of wanted to start over. 

I hide under the anonymous names to not have to show everything.

To not have to be who I really am. 

Because when I am who I really am (a shipping fanatic, crazy lunatic, bloodthirsty vengeful person) people hate me for it. 

*shrugs* I just went under Crescent 'cause I could be myself there.

All the insults that ever went to Crescent, were to an imaginary person. 

Under my main names, people expected me to be polite. 

That's what they always do. They expect me to be mature, amazing, responsible, everything I can never be. 

I look up to so many people, and think, someday I want to be like them.

But I can't. I'm only a helpless person, what more can I do? 

I'm socially awkward, I have to hide behind a mask, I'm 'behind' on everything, etc. 

Back to the real thing. 

People expect me to be this- this role model, this perfect person, this mature, incredible, polite, un-socially-awkward, calm, responsible person. 

Honestly? Can't do that. I'm a shipping fanatic, crazy lunatic, bloodthirsty vengeful barbarian, honestly? what can I help it with? When I was in 1st~4th I had raging sessions every recess. 

And honestly? I don't care anymore. I gave up a long time ago. People take advantage of my empathy (I try to hide it...sorry y'all...) and try to guilt-trip me. 

People have literally stolen things from me, hit me, punched me, guilt-tripped me.

The worst thing? 

They've broken my trust. 

So that's why I went under so many names. 

Because, under my un-main names, I could be whoever I wanted. 

I could be who I truly am. 

I'm so sorry y'all...this is in fact a confession of it's own...

*goes off to cry under the stars* 


submitted by themysticw0lf
(April 3, 2021 - 10:21 pm)

I'm sorry I made you feel that way, themysticw0lf :( And I respect your disision, but I'm always sad to see someone go. I wish I didn't write/say/type that on your thread. I hope your days get better and good luck on your test. I wish you felt welcome on here. I'm... so, so, so sorry. I am. I just- I don't even know.


I really- just- I- I don't even know. You will be missed.

submitted by Writing_in_the_dark, age 11, NY but not NYC
(April 3, 2021 - 10:48 am)

it's okay! If it came out a little rude, I swear I didn't mean it that way...it was literally 10:30 in the night and I woke up at like 6 that day to prepare for an appointment, so yeah. 


submitted by themysticw0lf
(April 3, 2021 - 10:22 pm)

It's very sad to hear you say you are leaving. I've seen a couple of your posts, and you seem like a very cool person! And I hope you come by soon! But please in the future don't say that you feel like the Cb was "more accepting before". I understand if you feel nostalgic for the old Cb, but that kind of stuff makes a newer Cber like me kind of sad. I don't really know what you mean that you don't feel welcome in general, but it's your choice to stay or go.

submitted by Lazerbat
(April 3, 2021 - 11:46 am)

Themysticw0lf, we will definitely miss you. You have made a giant impact on the CB, even from the beginning -- that is, I might add, an absolutely wonderful impact. 

You have always been so . . . You. You try your hardest through thick and thin, and I have always admired you for that. You're creative and funny. I know your time on the CB hasn't always been the easiest. <3 *hugs* I hope you come back or at least check in once in a while, and if you permanently leave, I completely understand. You have a lot going on right now and it can be good to focus on real life without a whole new set of worries. Although I will miss you I am also glad that you are taking a step to help yourself.
I'm sorry for anything I have done which has hurt you, or anything anyone else here is done. I hope we can be more accepting in the future. <3 
*hugs again* 
submitted by Feline Fantasy
(April 3, 2021 - 2:44 pm)

We love you and always will. I know you sort of well enough to know your style and it's amazing. Leave if you need to and stay if you can. I really think Hazel, Kitten and Writing never meant to hurt you in the way it did. I loved Nightfall, Nightsky, Song, Crescent and Girl on an Island. I loved you no matter your identity and when I think back to when I was a kid in twenty years you will be remembered as one of the people I respected, looked up to and just overall loved to hang out no matter the identity with whether it was virtual or not. Lumi you put emotions into words better then I ever can so thank you for showing Nightfall (That was the name I knew you by best so) that we care about you.

submitted by Princess Juniper, age she/her, Nowhere
(April 3, 2021 - 5:01 pm)

I'm really sorry that you feel you have to leave. I'm glad you decided to tell us eventually that you felt like you needed to use multiple identities to be yourself. If you feel like you can come back at some point, please do! We'll be here waiting. <3 Also, everything Lumi said because I agree with all of it but I can't do words. 

And I hope the science project goes well! 

submitted by Starchaser, age 13, Pyrrhia, (she/her)
(April 3, 2021 - 7:15 pm)

I honestly don’t know what to say. I never meant to attack you, or to poke fun at you, or to say that it wasn’t ‘right’ for you to change your name. I thought it was a politely-worded comment about how your name changes were just getting to be a bit confusing, just as Lumi said so eloquently above.

I’m truly sorry that you feel like you’re not welcomed. But I also think that you might be making a bigger deal than you need to out of some things. No one on the CB ever intends to hurt anyone or be anything other than welcoming. That’s not who we are. We will always try our best to explain things that are bothering us with civility and kindness, exactly as I attempted to do yesterday on your name change thread.

I really, really hope you don’t take this as me attacking you. I’m treading very carefully here. But this is something I’ve been thinking for some time, and I think that it needs to be said.

I’m not trying to stop you from leaving. That’s absolutely your choice to make, and I respect your decision. I just hope that you can understand where I’m coming from as well.

submitted by Kitten, age too young, to vote, she/her
(April 3, 2021 - 7:32 pm)

You are, and always will, be one of the CBers that first comes to mind when I think of the CB. I don't care about frequent name changes, or alternate CBer identities, or any of that. I care about you. The person who posted your unique, wonderful thoughts from the depths of your imagination; the person who graced us with your creativity and energetic personality. You can go by whatever name you want, because there's only one person behind those names and that's the person who we all love.

I'm not trying to keep you from leaving; that's your decision to make. But remember that we all love and care about you and no one on the CB has ever wanted to make you feel bad. Take care <3

~Silver Crystal 

submitted by Silver Crystal, age Infinity, Milky Way
(April 3, 2021 - 9:40 pm)

I definitely don't have enough time to respond to all the comments...Im so sorry y'all!

I'm just really sorry for everything I've ever done to hurt you lizards. <333

If I don't pop in every 2 months or so, just assume I'm either deep in depression or in a better place <333

Just remember, you are loved, you are cared for. 

You can be yourself, and nobody will judge you. 

That is one thing I've learned. 

The CB, the Admins, and the CBers inside it will always accept you for who you are.  

Lots of love y'all <33333333!


submitted by themysticw0lf@all
(April 3, 2021 - 10:26 pm)