Villain

Chatterbox: Crowd Sorcery

Villain

Villain

Note: You have until Monday, July 7, to create a villain in time for voting. Go here to see the schedule.

 

One of the most effective ways to be sure a story will have conflict that keeps readers breathlessly turning pages is to introduce a villain—someone whose goals collide head-on with the main character’s goals. We fantasy readers can all think of unforgettable villains from our favorite stories, those scary or relentless opponents that make life so difficult for the hero or heroine.

Villains need more than special magical powers to become so memorable that they haunt our imaginations; they also need as much personality and feeling as the hero. In actual life, almost no one ever sets out to become a villain. Perhaps your villain is desperate to protect her homeland, or family, or dragon. Perhaps the villain’s very life is at stake. There must always be a why, a solid reason behind the evil the villain does so that it makes sense—at least to him or her. 

Usually the plot will unfold if you can figure out the relationship of the villain to the main character and what the villain wants. For instance, in thinking about Quill, my heroine who comes out only in moonlight, I might wonder who cast the original spell on her grandmother and why. I’ll imagine it was a monstrous spirit-witch, Gershardt, who lives in a cavern beneath a pool in the forest. Gershardt’s spells can steal someone’s daytime essence, enabling her to take on a human form, leave the pool, and walk about in the world of mortals. But her spell fades over time so she is trying to steal Quill’s nighttime essence, too—although that would make Quill vanish forever.

In my example the stakes are high: the villain wants to continue living in the physical world, and so does the main character—whichever of them loses will disappear!

I might write for my Crowd Sorcery Sentences: “Gnarled hands rose from the water and gripped a tree root, followed by bony arms and a streaming tangle of white hair. Old Gershardt crept from the pool and stood dripping and frosty in the moonlight, blinking into the shadows with her pale blue eyes, chuckling through her toothless mouth.”

When I write, I try to keep in mind that, from the villain’s point of view, he or she is the true main character of the story, and it is the hero or heroine that is in the way. 

  1. 1. Name
  2. 2. Physical appearance
  3. 3. Background
  4. 4. Lair (Hut? Castle? Cave? Ship?)
  5. 5. What is the villain’s goal?
  6. 6. Attitude toward hero
  7. 7. How is the villain stronger than the hero?
  8. 8. How is the villain weak or vulnerable?
  9. 9. Why are the main character and the villain in conflict with each other?
  10. 10. Your Crowd Sorcery Sentence(s)

submitted by Fred Durbin
(April 23, 2014 - 11:54 am)

Forgot my sentences!

Khaos drifted slowly along the musty, forgotten halls of his cave. The rusting idols leered out from dark corners as though they were waiting for something. Khaos knocked one over as he glided by. Soon (insert hero/heroine's father's name) would regret killing him.(insert hero/heroine's father's name)  would regret everything. 

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 26, 2014 - 1:53 pm)

Forgot to describe his clothes!

Khaos wears a black crown made of his father's bones. His cape was made of shadows and trailed behind him as he walked. He has a blood red robe set with with inlaid ebony around the hem. He goes barefoot. 

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 27, 2014 - 12:44 pm)

1. Lycan

2. He is a werewolf. In human form he has deep black hair and explosively green eyes. He is shockingly handsome. In wolf form he is a huge black timberwolf. 

3. Born a werewolf, he must murder and consume people to keep himself immortal. He has no conscience because of this and lusts for the blood of the hero, due to the fact that the hero's father put out his eye.

4. He's a wanderer. He leaves after killing a few people and satisfying his hunger.

5. To feast upon the blood of the hero, witch has magical properties that will restore his eye.

6. See numbers 5 and 3

7. He's a cunning, charming man who could easily tear you limb from limb if he wanted.

8. He is madly obsessed with killing the hero.

9. See numbers 8, 5 and 3.

10.

The milkmaid clutched the bucket of milk as she walked along the path home. It was the night of the full moon, and it was making her nervous. She shuddered and quickened her pace. What was that? She sloshed some milk in terror, not caring about her soaked boots.

"Hello?"

What was that? WHAT WAS THAT? She started to breathe rapidly. Calm down. Don't scream. Don't--

A hand grabbed her shoulder.

"AAAAAH!"

She whirled around to see the smiling face of a young man.

"Lycan!" she yelp-laughed, "what are you doing out here? I'm glad you're here. I thought it was a bear! I picked the right night to be outside--"

"No. You didn't."

"What do--"

Far away in the farmhouse that she had been traveling to, no one heard the milk bucket hit the ground. No one heard the tiny, terrified scream that stopped in exactly three seconds. And no one, absolutely no one, heard Lycan's high, cruel laugh.

 

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 20, 2014 - 3:19 pm)

I like that you named your villain Lycan, after the first werewolf.

submitted by Bounty, age 12, Crowd Sorcery
(June 25, 2014 - 12:33 pm)

Thanks :)

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 26, 2014 - 1:42 pm)

He wears pitch black clothing and his canine teeth protrude slightly.

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 27, 2014 - 12:46 pm)

Okay, let's try this. 

Name: Valencia Emmeline

Appearance: Tall and regal, beautiful. Olive skin. Long elegant black hair, now tangled. Dark blue eyes. A long red dress with gold and black, very elegante and old-fashioned, sort of medieval. Long red nails and lips. A line-less face of a young woman, but...old. She looks like she's lived centuries. She probably looks pretty put of place.

Background: Valencia was once the queen of a vast kingdom. She was a force to be reckoned with, a just, but cold, ruler. She did what she had to do for her people and made difficult calls. Her kingdom was at war and she did what she had to do. She was an enchantress, holding the same magic that the one on throne had always held, with a little something extra from herself. Ahe wasn't born a princess, but she had been found worthy by the prophecy that fortold all rulers. The tapestry on which it was written cut off after her name, seemingly burnt... At the height of the war, when Valencia was the one force between her empire and destruction, (and, you know, an army, but they wouldn't have lasted long without a guiding force), she was cornered by her chief advisors and a number of her guards. The three advisors had each been bribed by the opposing nation with something they desperately wanted...more power, a loved one brought back, a cure...They cornered her in the lowest room of her castle, near a giant crystal through which the Queen got her power through. She warded them off easily, screaming about their betrayal, but what she didn't know was that they had mages working in the tower. With one false step she fell and was imprisoned by her very own crystal. She didn't awaken for more than a hundred years? The crystal had been moved, and no one knew what was inside. She was saved by a curious nobel, in a new castle. When she stumbled out she realised her kingdom was gone, replaced with a new power--run by someone else. She grew angry, her kingdom had fallen, her people, her land! This new kingdom, this silly little kingdom...it was hers. She ran and hid herself away, plotting to take back the land that was her right and rebuild the kingdom she had lost.

Lair: When she ran away she found her old castle, now decrepit and covered in vines, hidden by foliage. She paces the wide halls alone, plotting, seething.

Goal: To take the new kingdom and make it hers, possibly reforming it into the one she once ruled.

Hero: Not quite sure who the hero is, but she seems him/her as nothing. An annoying gnat standing in the way of justice and her plans.

Strengths: She has powerful magic, she has an entire castle at her disposal, she is cunning, smart and intimidating. She knows how to get what she wants. Conviction. She has experience--she used to run a country, after all.

Weaknesses: Valencia is angry, bitter, and a bit...unstable.

Conflict: She will do whatever she has to to get the kingdom. The hero doesn't want this, as she's causing a lot of harm. However, Valencia is willing to do anything, and she may be able to offer the hero some help with their goal if they help her...Will their conviction stand or will they give in? Will Valencia gain control of a nation, over-throwing a nation and ignoring all order to make herself the prime power and gain controll, including melding the new kingdom in her image? Or will the hero stop her in time?

CSS: "You betrayed me!", screamed Valencia. She waved her arms wildly in the dim light, her voluminous sleeves flapping. She backed away from the guards' swords, her hands pulsing with a purple light. As she wrapped it around herself, she went on. "You-This kingdom is mine!" She glared at her ex-advisors, her voice laced with anger and pain. "I earned it! And it will always be mine! You are noth--" Her words cut out, for just as her heeled foot stumbled over a crack on the concrete floor, the crystal behind her seemed to melt itself a door, and Queen Valencia Emmeline was trapped forever in the blue stone, her mouth frozen in a silent scream.

 

 

 

 

 

 

submitted by Kiki, age 13, Oregon
(June 22, 2014 - 3:01 am)
  1. 1. Name
  2. La Scientifica A.K.A. Lucy Borgmann

  3. 2. Physical appearance
  4. She has ice blue hair reaching to her shoulders,(A result of the scientists) and rather dark skin with pirceing black eyes. She is tall, and wears a blue wolf skin shawl over a knee- length black dress. Her fingers are unnaturally long, and she has very sharp fingernails. She wears an animal call for when she speaks to her animal slaves.

  5. 3. Background
  6. Grew up extremely poor, and under a particularly mean ruler. She learned to resent royalty. Her parents abandoned her at age 9 and she was taken hostage by aforesaid ruler, who then proceeded to force her to be the victim of many scientific experiments changing her for the worse. Lucy, now 19, abhorred all mankind. She escaped from the palace of experiments and went into the woods, where she began enslaving animals and building up her domain. 
  7. 4. Lair (Hut? Castle? Cave? Ship?)
  8. Her lab is under a magic waterfall, which emits precious water diamonds every two weeks. These, she uses in her lab to bind the animals to her.
  9. 5. What is the villain’s goal?
  10. To use her animals as a means of destroying mankind.

  11. 6. Attitude toward hero
  12. Lucy thinks he/she is dirty human scum, and believes he/she is not capable of overcoming her force of animals.
  13. 7. How is the villain stronger than the hero?
  14. She possesses the magic water diamonds, which, when wished upon, grant every wish except one. This one wish is to destroy mankind.

  15. 8. How is the villain weak or vulnerable?
  16. She is quite lonely for human company, and as a means of soothing this loneliness she injects herself with abhorrence. When deprived of her abhorrence, she will go into a trance.

  17. 9. Why are the main character and the villain in conflict with each other?
  18. Lucy is mangling the animals with her binding potion. The main character befriends the animals instead, making them feel more loved than with Lucy. Lucy has been so twisted by the palace scientists, she can't bear the thought of an opponent. She also is scarred by the kindness the main character showed upon their first meeting. 

  19. 10. Your Crowd Sorcery Sentence(s)
  20. Lucy winced. Her needle was getting dull again. As the abhorrence flowed into her bloodstream, she felt something odd. It hurt her, but with a matter she had not felt for years. Tears flowed down her cheeks. They were ice cold, yet felt like a hungry fire. Suddenly she was gripped with fear. It was the human! That little wrech! It had mixed happiness into her abhorrence! As she fought back the happiness, she saw one of her animals. This one was a wolf. But it had changed. It was now backing away from the coldness of her lab. She wondered why. But then she saw it. It was a spark of happiness in the wolf's eye. At once she knew. That kid was serious trouble. The little fool! How dare it tamper with her mechinisms! She stood up and roared with the power of a dinosaur. She would have to take down that fool of a child.
I hope you enjoy it!  
If you use her, can you make her become happy in the end?  
submitted by Puff the MagicDragon, age Is UNKNOWN, Hannalee
(June 22, 2014 - 11:24 pm)

The mind has been changed. If my character gets chosen, she can die in the end. La Scientifica is pretty awesome. '

 

This in some ways reminds me of The Hunger Games, except less brutal. Each CBer has chosen a character. But only one will advance to the story and come to life in attempt to destroy or revive what is or once was.

submitted by Puff the MagicDragon, age Is UNKNOWN, Hannalee
(July 5, 2014 - 11:05 pm)

Here's my Crowd Sorcery villain... 

1. Name

Verla Mignon

2. Physical appearance

Curly black hair with purple streaks. Sometimes. Other times, it's entirely purple, and sometimes it's blue and straight and totally cool-looking. And once, when she was a toddler who didn't know what she was doing, her hair was 100,000,000,000,000,000,000 feet long.

Confused? Verla has the power to change the color, shape, and general physical markup of her hair. Usually, she just keeps it plain, brown and short.

Other details: Slim body, about 5'3", often wears a black cloak, black open-toed shoes, no socks, and, when in public, a veil over her face. 17 years old.

3. Background

One day Verla's parents killed her guinea pig because it was dying anyway and could not be cured. She was like six and she didn't understand, and she was so upset that she ran away, far away, before they could explain. Then she killed her parents' friends and her other family to exact revenge, and her parents had her arrested and imprisoned. She escaped the prison and went on the run, and has been on the run since.

When she was about 9 Verla broke into her parents' house after they died of heart failure, and found her mom's diary. After reading it she understood what had happened and why they had killed her beloved pet, and she realized that she had commited such atrocious crimes over something that was really no big deal. She became even more traumatized, and decided to do whatever she could to right her wrongs.

In a way that didn't involve turning herself in and going back to prison, that is. 

4. Lair (Hut? Castle? Cave? Ship?)

Nowhere. She roams from place to place, has no real base anywhere. She does have a case of stuff she carries around with her but that's it.

5. What is the villain’s goal?

Since Verla's insane and really disturbed and all that owing to the incident with the murders and everything, she wants to bring her family back from the dead. Plus her guinea pig. Unfortunately, doing so will require necromancy, which she's going to have to kill a LOT more people in order to do. Pretty much like a whole city of people. And then, not only that, but she'll unavoidably have to raise a million other dead along with her family, which includes some certain... bad people.

But she doesn't care about the consequences, so long as she manages to resurrect her family. 

6. Attitude toward hero

She sees him/her as an obstacle in the way of her goal of bringing her family back to life. And she will do anything to get around them.

7. How is the villain stronger than the hero?

Well, Verla can kill. And she can control her hair. Plus, she knows a lot of dark stuff about dark magic and evil stuff, which she has learned along the quest to get her life back.

8. How is the villain weak or vulnerable?

She's easily offended, and of course easily upset. She will break down at the tiniest thing that doesn't go her way. But when it's a BIG thing she goes totally nuts and will probably kill whoever  is responsible.

She also is unwilling the acknowledge that her goals are not the right way to handle her problems, although deep down inside she knows it. And also, while to many people she seems like a cold-blooded psycho murderer, in her heart she's still just that little six-year-old who loved her guinea pig too much.

Verla Mignon just never grew up! 

9. Why are the main character and the villain in conflict with each other?

The main character doesn't want a whole village of innocent people and a whole world of evil spirits to be brought back from the dead, obviously. While Verla does, of course, and will stop at nothing to do it in order to revive her family... like I already said.

10. Your Crowd Sorcery Sentence(s)

Verla banged on the door agressively.

"I'm sorry, but we're closed!" called the shopkeeper. Verla sighed. Another infernal obstacle. She needed this thing NOW. She opened her bag and pulled out an axe.

A moment later the door was demolished.

The shopkeeper looked furious. "Why, you..." he growled, "you're paying for that, you little twit!" But then when the dust settled, and Verla entered the shop out of the black night outside, his attitude changed.

"Don't hurt me," he said, recognizing Verla. Of course, she thought. It was easy to forget but she was still a legendary and wanted fugitive. "Just take what you want. Please, please, I have children."

"Where's that book about necromancy?" Verla asked.

"What?" said the shopkeeper. "I'm not giving you... !" Then he remembered who he was talking to. "Yes, yes. Of course."

He slowly went to the shelf and pulled out the dusty, dangerous tome.

Verla took it. "Much obliged. But that's not all..."

The shopkeeper looked fearful. "No! Leave please! I gave you what you want! Please, please go!"

Verla stabbed the shopkeeper. He screamed and fell, dead. She cooly wiped the blade on her pants and walked out the door. As she did so, she lifted up her blade and pressed the handle gently, and the man's soul was absorbed.

I'll have my family back soon, she thought. Seven down, about one thousand four hundred and fifty-six more to go.

Or was it one million?

***********

Ok that's my villain. Bye. 

submitted by Joe the Stickfiddler, age 15, Villain Vortex
(June 24, 2014 - 4:47 pm)

Name: Serpentine Bloodkin

Phyisical Appearence: Lanky, Tall, Pale, whispy white hair, pointed chin, dagger like black eyes, defined cheekbones, metal claw rings on her thin fingers, and a midnight blue cloak

Background: She was once a wealthy happy weaver, until her lover betrayed her, and she killed him. From then forward, her heart turned to stone, and she fled far away, plotting revenge on the people who "hurt her", and becoming a tyrant to her village, and was well known far and wide as an evil queen.

Lair: Castle where she tyrants her people

Goal: Punish everyone who defys her

Attitude toward hero: Someone who must be stopped

Villian stronger than hero: She has power, weapons, minions, and a devilish attitude, and does not live in the fear of hurting others

Villian weak: She is weak because her heart does not want to be melted, and she can't face the truth of her actions

Conflict: The hero and the villian are in conflict because she does not want to be defeated.

Sentences: Suddenly, a chill swept through the room, that made your bones crackle and your hearts pound feverishly in your chest. Lips trembling in fear, you hear swift and stomping footsteps that send a wave of panic rushing through you. The doors bang open harshly, and Serpentine glides into the room. 

submitted by Edie the bewildered, age 12, middle of no where
(June 25, 2014 - 6:59 pm)

Is it alrgith if I just make  a villain? I wasn't here in time for the Hero/ Heroine stuff :(

submitted by Ariel K, age 12, Atlanta, Georgia
(June 26, 2014 - 7:09 am)

Yes! It's perfectly fine if you make up a villain now! Fred said that the villain thread would be open for a couple more weeks before they open voting on villains!!!

(And I hope Verla gets selected as a finalist, of course... she's wicked...)

submitted by Joe the Stickfiddler, age 15, Time Vortex
(June 26, 2014 - 2:21 pm)

I hope one of my villains is nominated. I have an evil spirit named Khaos, a werewolf named Lycan, and two vengeful siblings.

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 27, 2014 - 3:18 pm)

1. Mewlore and Waspax

2. Mewlore is a girl. She has white blond hair and pale skin with light blue eyes. She is very delicate. Waspax is her older brother. He is thin but tan and strong. He has black hair and dark brown eyes.

3. Waspax and Mewlore were toddlers when their parents were killed in an accident. Waspax thinks that the hero (or the hero's parent, depending on whether the hero was an orphan or not) was responsible for their parents' deaths. Mewlore doesn't remember the accident but has a scar from it (the accident was an avalanche). Waspax is desperate to protect his sister, who is already fragile. He feels he can rest when the hero is dead.

4. An abandoned farm.

5. See number 3

6. See number 3

7. Waspax is stronger because he has no consience. Mewlore is stronger because she is superintelligent.

8. Waspax will do anything to protect his sister, and Mewlore is very shy.

9. See number 3

10. Mewlore couldn't remember that day. But Waspax could. He could remember every detail of the person's face as he let the mudslide roll down. Most would think it was an accident. No. It couldn't have been. Could it?

No.

Waspax remembered clutching his infant sister as his father told him to run. He remembered streaking away as the mudslide covered his house. And a tear fell from his face as he remembered looking at his sister, the only bit of memory he had.

That was then.

Now he had to stay strong, to lead his sister and protect her at all costs. He also needed to get some revenge...

submitted by Brooke E., age 11, Arkansas
(June 26, 2014 - 3:49 pm)