XD, I have so many of these with my sailing team:

- "The watch is rightfully mine."

- "Delaney is the worm!"

- "It's the gluten-free gluten!"

- "CHIP'S AHOY!" (Yes, that apostrophe is there for a reason)

Those were the four funniest, and also the only ones I could think of right now, so I'll post more later. 

It must be the invisible penguins!

HALT YE!!!

I have lots more, but I'll post them later, cause I can't think of them. 

Most of my family's inside jokes are alternate names for things. For example, we drink cow juice, sound the pickle, feed the chickens, pet the squirrel and the blueberry, and baby talk at the watermelon toaster.

Here are the ones I can remember:

- "How's lif?"

- "Heya, long lost cous'!"

- "NENJAs!"

- "They are married."

- "I died. ASHLEE I DIED."

- "She's my adopted sister."

That's all for now! If you want me to explain them, I can but shh... I never said anything. 

~"What do you think?" "I think it's too high." (This is one my Granddad taught me.)

~ "It's Dell!" (This one is just randomness.)

~ "You want cheese on that?" "You know I do!" (Weirdness with friends.)

~ Mayo, the store that has every flavor of mayo you can imagine. (Same friends.)

~ WBYCEIYDBO (anybody else seen that commercial?) 

I know I have more, but I can't think of them right now.  

Right now I have this one with two of my theatre friends (let's call them H and A). We always change together, and my costume is hard to unzip, so whenever I say "can someone unzip me?" they race to unzip me.

So yesterday, I was changing a different time with A and someone else (let's call her L) and I said "can someone unzip me?" L reached for it, but A shot out her hands and unzipped me really fast. Then we laughed and said "no one gets that except us"

Hmm. That's more funny when you're sleep deprived.

"It's a floating granny lamp!"

"Didn't that just guide your soul through life's emotional journey?" (That one sounds weird but it's really funny to my best friend and I because, well, it's an inside joke.)

"It's a potato shark." 

That's all for now, I'll probably think of more later.

My sister and I have one that we use all the time. We were talking to my grandma on the phone one time and she said, "Lydia, you're so cute!" to my sister but I thought she said, "Lydia, you're such a kelp" because we were getting bad service at the time. So now whenever one of us does something dumb the other will go, "You're such a kelp!"

Here's some more! 

"Says the one who thinks he can outrun the sun."

"Ooshleeeee!!!"

Ugh, there was another one I thought of earlier but I forgot. I'll remember it eventually!  

"You goose!" "You duck!" (This is with my best friend, Teresa)

"Look it's a nightmare dressed like a daydream." (No I'm not a Taylor Swift fan at all, but if I can't call my best friend something terrible what's the point of having one?)

My best friend is an angel and I'm the furry, blue, demonic alien.

"WADDLE"

Flaming goats

T-rexes 

LaLaloopsies

Taxes (Ruby I'm lookin' at you)

Deadpan Snarker

And there's tons more. Just tons.  Most of which originated here.