Chatterbox: Down to Earth



Confess your deepest secrets here, anonymously, if you'd prefer

I won't judge

submitted by Anonymous, age x, x
(October 15, 2020 - 1:43 pm)

Hi! Strawberrii here.

I know how you feel. I'm a teenager, but I'm definitely not of dating age yet, haha.

My advice is to just be yourself. No matter how he feels about you or how you feel about him, you should just focus on keeping a beautiful friendship.

Don't try to make him like you, or anything like that. It'll just make things awkward.

I know this sounds hard, but just try to be his friend. If it escalates and becomes a situation where you both actually do like each other, then that's great! But don't try to throw yourself or force yourself on him, because it might make him uncomfortable around you.

Hope this helps! 

submitted by ʚ Strawberrii ɞ
(December 8, 2022 - 2:02 pm)

sometimes i feel like i kind of hate a few of my family members; they're so irritating and they don't understand me. i always get over it in the end, but they can be hateful in the meantime.

submitted by nameless
(December 9, 2022 - 6:09 pm)

It's natural to get angry sometimes, but I'm glad you always get over it.

Maybe try telling your family members how you feel, and help them understand you more. 

submitted by ʚ Strawberrii ɞ
(December 10, 2022 - 2:04 pm)

yes, that would help. also i probably need to stop being so prone to losing my temper. thanks, Strawberri!

submitted by nameless
(December 16, 2022 - 10:06 pm)

I'm not cut out to have more than a couple friends

I'm not accustomed to people insisting on hugging me goodbye

or thinking I'm cool

And I hate when they say "love you" so casually

because I can't say it back

because to me, saying I love you is a big thing. 

It means I genuinely care about and appreciate the person I tell it to.

and to get there takes time.

i can't just throw it around in passing.

But I have to.

Im not used to having anyone in my life besides those few people, who I've known for years. 

Being around them is like breathing. 

I hate when hanging out with the people I call my friends is a struggle.

i really don't know why they like me so much 


i don't know what I did to deserve them being so nice to me 

especially if I can't bring myself to be so nice back.

submitted by Tenebrae
(December 11, 2022 - 11:32 pm)

I understand, and just wanna ket you know it's completely human to feel this way.

For the longest of times I had a difficult time with the same things, and then my younger sister after me. It might be helpful to remember that you don't owe people anything just because they're nice to you; you also don't have have to express yourself the same way they do.

If you have a hard time interacting with new people and reciprocating, that's okay. Take your time. Be honest. Honesty doesn't necessarily mean you have to tell the whole truth, though. If you had fun, even just the tiniest bit, you can tell them as much, even if you don't mention the part where you were exhausted or bored or nervous, etc.. You might also want to try sharing little bits of your struggles, let people know you're a little shy, but still willing to talk a little; show them that you're human, and don't necessarily hate everyone(or at least that's what it seems like based on what you said), you just need some time to warm up to others, etc.. Then you can think about the interactions you have and find the positive, and then the negatives; then use those as a jumping off point for the future. How can you make things better for yourself?

But in the end, don't feel forced to do or feel anything. You don't need to be best friends with everyone you meet, and that's not a problem. It might be a significant help if you can outgrow your guilt over the perceived inequality in most of the casual interactions you're inevitably going to have, but it's really all your decision after the smoke has cleared -- the ball is in your court, Tenebrae. :)

submitted by Jaybells@Tenebrae, Lost, somewhere
(December 13, 2022 - 8:22 pm)

*virtual hug*

submitted by Darkvine
(December 14, 2022 - 8:49 pm)

My only real friends are so toxic but I don't want to leave them because then I'll be friendless.

submitted by someone
(December 14, 2022 - 4:46 pm)

to be perfectly honest? i think you should leave them, regardless. there's no point in keeping a friendship with someone who makes you uncomfortable, no matter how long you've known them. it can be terribly hard to feel friendless, and just as hard to find new friends, but I think anyone can do it. it goes against a lot of your instincts (if you're an introvert, anyway) to reach out to someone first -- to strike up a conversation with them, or ask to sit with them at lunch, or whatever -- but honestly, if they're decent people who're worth being friends with, they'll probably welcome you.

those're my thoughts, anyway. gl <3

submitted by Artemis
(December 14, 2022 - 7:32 pm)

I can only agree with everything Artemis said, and add that maybe it would help to confront your "friends" - just let them know that they're bothering you, and warn them that you'll stop being friends with them if they go on that way. Very often, if you look and act authoritative and self-confident, other people will instinctively defer to you. If someone else makes you uncomfortable, stand up for yourself, and maybe it will get the message across to them. This can be really hard, I know - you don't have to do it - but it might be worth a shot. Anyway, I hope everything works out for you - good luck and best wishes! :)

submitted by Poinsettia
(December 14, 2022 - 8:55 pm)

I don't really get what something like "she/they" means. Would that person usually go by she/her but is saying that they/them is okay with them too, if someone wants to call them that? Or are they genderfluid, switching between she/her and they/them? Or something else?

Also, I know someone who goes by, and I quote them, "he/they/she/anything," which also confuses me. Do they use mostly he/him but are fine with anything else? Or is it genderfluidity? Or something else?

I'm anonymous right now because I feel like I should know this, especially with all of the LGBTQ+ awareness that's happening in the world (but also in my school, it's a really accepting place and there are a lot of people who identify as LGBTQ+) right now, and I'm embarrassed I don't. But every time I don't ask, it gets worse, because it seems like more and more people around me know and I really should to. I don't really understand it, and no one's ever explained. Can someone help clear this up?

submitted by Confused??
(December 14, 2022 - 7:14 pm)

Don't feel bad, it's normal to be confused about things you aren't familiar with!  I know that some people are comfortable with multiple sets of pronouns, and some prefer that you alternate between a few (ex. using she in one sentence and they the next).  My advice would be that if you aren't sure, just ask them!

submitted by Sterling, age 16 winters, lost in a fantasy world
(December 14, 2022 - 8:22 pm)

Don't feel embarassed! I myself knew hardly anything about the LGBTQ+ movement until a couple years ago, when my mom explained it to me. I know everyone talks about it a ton, but it's still not something essential for children to know about, at least in my view. It's important, yes - it's definitely an issue, as with everything that affects any human being - but it's just as definitely okay if you happened not to know about it yet!

If you want to know more - and it is confusing - I'd recommend asking your mom or dad to clear it up for you. They can probably explain better than I can. :)

submitted by @Confused??, actually Poinsettia :)
(December 14, 2022 - 9:02 pm)

Honestly, as deep as I am in the LGBTQ+ community, I also have no idea sometimes XD

I agree with Sterling, if you're unsure it's absolutely fine to ask! I can assure you that when people ask me about how to use my pronouns I'm never annoyed at them for not knowing or immediately understanding. Instead I'm just glad they're taking the time to ask and get a better understanding of our situation! Again, as common as these situations are, it's not really the "norm" yet, and it's ok not to get it immediately. As long as you're open to learning, I don't think you'll find yourself in much trouble. :)

And I totally get feeling really nervous/embarrassed about asking, but it'll honestly likely not be that bad. A few months ago I would have been absolutely petrified to ask, even in the CB (in fact, back then I had such an experience with Gallium, then known as Wildfire, where I was kinda overwhelmed with her AE's pronouns and forced myself to look into it and confirm with her. I ended up finding out I was using their pronouns incorrectly at first, which I thought was the worst thing in the world for a good week or so as I agonised over it, but after she explained we were good to go, and she didn't seem offended or anything at all). 

submitted by Jaybells, Lost, somewhere
(December 14, 2022 - 9:35 pm)

This would be considered "not that deep" but I am so socially awkward that I yelled to someone I barely know from across a room referencing a one line conversation which took place earlier that day and was then accused of being his girlfriend. Why I did this, I will never know but somehow I was considered to be so annoying that I got straight up ignored by this person. That's what I get for trying to socialize. -_- -_- -_-

submitted by Wolfy, age 13, - - -
(December 21, 2022 - 3:23 pm)