My story called

Chatterbox: Inkwell

My story called

My story called Nadia!

Okay, I know this isn't as good as your FABULOUS stories you are posting up, but I just wanted to share a little excerpt of what I've written from my story Nadia!

Nadia is about a girl who is an apprentince aboard the passenger vessel Venus, and just her adventures. I know this isn't really that good, so please don't be too critical, but tell the truth! And I'm welcome to any suggestions!

"Welcome aboard the Venus!" Nadia ushered the large and
loud crowd of passengers aboard. "Please find your cabins and make
yourselves comfortable!"
The passengers scurried to their
cabins and as soon as the hallways were cleared, Nadia ran to the
kitchens to not only help out, but to admire the delicious meals the
chefs were cooking.
    "NADIA!" Bellowed Chef Vardenal
cheerfully. He dropped his wooden spoon he was using to stir a stew and
squeezed Nadia in a bear hug.
    "Chef! Ah-why the high spirits?" Nadia laughed as she escaped his tight embrace.
    "Oh, I'm always excited on the day we set sail from land!" Chef Vardenal picked up his spoon and returned to his work.
    "Who isn't?" Nadia shrugged. "Need any help here?" She grabbed a rag and scrubbed at a mess of spaghetti sauce on the floor.
    "No, but thank you darling!" the chef replied. "But I hear Gloria needs help with the laundry!"
    "Everybody! The ship's setting sail in a few!" Shelley stuck his head in the kitchen and then dashed off.
    "Duty calls!" Nadia saluted Chef Vardenal and ran off to the cabins to warn the passengers and hand out the seasick bags.  

submitted by Kinaya H., age 12
(January 27, 2009 - 7:20 pm)

I like it, I woulden't be able to write something like that, very, very, truthfully.  I like your names.  Maybe you could say her personality, and what she looks like.  

submitted by Meadow, age 11, IL
(January 28, 2009 - 11:44 am)

Like 4 example if she went on deck, "her naturally blonde hair flew behind her, billowing out in a puff of golden strands with a silver lining."

You can use that. It's not like I copyrighted it! :) 

submitted by Rachel M., age 10, Neenah, WI1
(August 2, 2010 - 11:37 am)