The Aurora Bear...........

Chatterbox: Inkwell

The Aurora Bear...........

The Aurora Bear........... I started writing this book a while back, I really like the story so far...but i don't know what to write next. I thought that all you lovely CBers might help. Here is the story so far. It is kinda long. but there are chapters so..HAPPY READING.
THE BEGINNING Willow could hear the wind and rain whipping against her bedroom window as she wrote in her new diary;
Hello, I’m Willow. Most people think being the tribal chief’s daughter is great, but what they don’t know is that my family is cursed. The goddess that cursed us is called the Aurora Bear. She lets a child from every other generation try to break the curse. I am that child.
After Willow wrote the last word she heard her dad calling her from downstairs for dinner. Willow jumped up and ran down stairs to the table in the dinning room. “How do you like your new school outfit?” Willow’s mom asked. “Good.” Willow said quickly as she took a bite of her white rice and anko paste. “Mom? Why is our family cursed?” Willow asked curiously. “I’ll tell you tomorrow after school. OK?” said her mom. “But why?” Willow whined. “It is just too late” Willow’s Dad interrupted. After dinner Willow went back up stairs and continued writing in her diary.
Hello again, I just had anko paste for dinner. It’s made of sweet red beans. Tomorrow is my first day of school and I’m taking my spirit test. A spirit test is when the chief’s child takes a test to see what their guardian animal is. I hope mine is either a wolf, fox, or a panther! Bye.
In the morning Willow woke up to see the sun shining bright outside. “Willow it’s time to go to school” Willow’s mom called from her parent’s room, “coming mom” Willow said as she rushed down the hallway to the shoe closet to get her boots. As Willow ran out the door she saw a black wolf with gold eyes. Willow stopped for a moment and looked at the wolf closely. It looked like the wolf was fading away in to the shadows! Willow looked at her watch and realized she was late for school. When she got to school she looked around to see if she could find her best friend Fawn. When Willow found Fawn…. she ran over and hugged her tightly “Fawn! How have you been…… Where have you been? Oh by the way I’m taking my spirit test today! Willow said happily! “You are?” Fawn said. After Willow and Fawn were done saying hello they went to their first class. Willow and Fawn’s first class was cooking. Willow liked that class the best because she and her mom could find new recipes to put to the test with their skills. Fawn had been having trouble with the bundt cakes that they were making, Willow walked up to Fawn and said “Hey Fawn, are you having trouble with the cake?” “Yeah, a little bit could you help me?” Willow agreed and helped Fawn. Just as Fawn put the cake in the oven the bell rang. Every body rushed outside to see what was going on. In the courtyard there was the exact wolf that Willow had seen that morning. It was wandering around the courtyard looking for Willow. When Willow saw this she walked slowly over to the wolf and said “Are looking for me, cause you found me”. The wolf sat down and bumped against Willow in a loving way, “Aww he likes you” Fawn said as she walked over. When Fawn tried to pet the wolf, he growled at Fawn. “Whoa, I guess he does not like me” Fawn said as she backed up. Willow stood up and asked the nearby teacher to call her dad. After her dad got there Willow asked him what this was all about. “Well there is something I have been meaning to tell you. When you take a spirit test, your spirit animal becomes your guardian,. As you can see the wolf is your guardian and will attack any body that tries to hurt you” he motioned and fawn. “So I guess I have a pet wolf now, and I don’t have to take the spirit test.” Willow said a little dazed. After everybody left the school Willow and Fawn went to Willow’s house. When they got there Willow asked Fawn if she wanted to help name the wolf? So they sat down to think for a minute. Just then they thought of a good name for the wolf. Willow went over to her mom and suggested the name Wiccan. Her mom thought it was a cute name. Later when it was time for Fawn to go home Fawn’s mom called and asked if they could come over for dinner? Willow’s mom said it was OK. After dinner was finished Willow and Fawn went up to Willows room to set a bed for the wolf, when it was time for bed Willow was just about to get under the covers when she noticed that Wiccan was looking out the window at the aurora borealis, Willow got up out of bed and walked over to the window next to her wolf and saw it.
What Willow saw in the sky was NOT the aurora borealis, it was a goddess with pale skin, piercing blue eyes, long white hair, a dress that looked like it was woven out of ice and snow. A top her head was a crown of antlers made of pure ice and color full ribbons that were made of magic and power and was what Willow thought was the aurora borealis but actually the head dress of a goddess. Willow grabbed the book on the God,s and Goddess,s of the arctic.
She flipped though the pages of Arctic Goddess, s, when she found the proper description Willow read the name “The Aurora Bear. She is a beautiful Goddess of the polar bears, some tales say she is was a polar bear her self before her power awakened.” Willow closed the book and remembered that The Aurora Bear was the goddess that cursed her family, but why was she here now. The goddess opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted by the howling of wolfs, when the wolfs had gone silent again the goddess spoke in a flowing voice and said “Willow your time has come to try to break your family's curse, now that you have spirit guard it will be safe for you.
I will guide you on your journey to break the curse. Willow thought about it and was about to answer when she heard her mom yell “Willow are you in bed yet” Willow looked at the sky at the goddess but she was gone, Willow sat at the window with Wicca curled around her and feel asleep.
The next morning Willow got up early to make herself breakfast and pack her launch, when her mom came down she was surprised to see Willow already up. That day Willow skipped school and explored the woods behind her school, of course Wicca came with. When Willow was walking through the forest she heard a voice in her head “Willow stay alert you are in the part of the woods that the wolfs own, be careful. Willow shook her head “why would Wolfs want to attack another wolf?”. Half an our later Willow thought that she should head back to her house, “mom and day must be worried”. Before Willow had even stepped up to the door her dad and mom burst out and rapped their arms around her. “Mom, Dad” Willow said sternly “we need to talk”. Willow and her parents sat down in the living room to have a discussion, what do you want to talk about? Well, Willow said “You know how I can try to break our family's curse, I think I’m ready to do that”.
Willow hopped on to Wiccan and rode in to the forest. Half an hour latter Willow jumped of Wiccan and onto a patch of moss near a spring. This was the place she was going to set up camp for now. She looked around, there was a sakura tree and a hot spring. She could live hear for now, but it wasn’t nearly close enough to the Aurora temple. After Willow set up camp she hopped back on Wiccan to go look for food. Soon Willow came to a stream. When she looked in she saw sanke salmon and ruby fin carp. Wiccan bounded in the water, scaring all the fish. Willow looked at the wolf with low eyes, “really Wiccan, now you’re happy”. Wiccan looked at her and shook all of the water on him. Later that night Willow was sat near the fire propped up by Wiccan, who promptly curled around her after dinner.
Willow was gathering offerings for the Aurora temple. Something hit her in the back and knocked her over. “Wiccan” Willow growled and she brushed her self of. Wiccan was sitting by the tent, looking innocent. Willow slowly walked over to Wiccan, when she got close enough she grabbed his face and looked him in the eye and whispered “listen you, we are going to the temple today and you best behave your self”. Wiccan barked happily. At midnight Willow and Wiccan walked through the forest in search of the temple. Wiccan barked when he saw a glowing light up ahead. Willow followed his gaze, it was the temple! Willow broke out in a run, “we are getting so close” Willow exclaimed. Wiccan and Willow finely crashed out of the forest. The temple was made of pure diamond. When Willow walked in she was in awe. On the throne in the middle of the room was the Goddess The Aurora Bear. This was the Goddess in her true form! She rose from the throne and walked over to willow, she was as light as a feather. Wiccan sat down and bowed his head as the goddess came closer , Willow got down on one leg just as Wiccan did. “Rise” the goddess said, her voice was as light and soft as velvet. “I am the goddess Aurora Bear. I summon you to break your family's curse, you must go throughout the land and collect all of the ark guardians. They are powerful animals that have powers that will help you on your journey. Other guardian owners will help you on your way. The first is just out back”.
Willow got up and went out back, she saw a girl about 18. She had lavender hair and a white tiger by her side. The tiger sniffed over to Wiccan and bumped against him. The girl looked over at Willow and slowly walked over to her. “My name is Lavender Foxtail and I wall go with you on your journey”. She stuck out her hand. After their greetings the both went back to Willows camp. “sooo Lavender, whats your guardians name”? “Tempest” she said and looked away. That night when Willow was falling asleep she heard voices but it wasn’t Lavender. Willow followed the sound of the voices over to a clearing by a cherry tree. There were two people standing in the shade of the tree. One was just taller than Willow and had short black hair, he also was wearing a long black trench coat over a rugged shirt, his pants he was wearing had a rip in it. The other person was also male but with long white and black hair. He had jeans and a gray shirt on, Willow thought she also so saw tiger tail swishing back and forth. She slowly crept behind a bush I the clearing. Willow couldn’t hear what the people were saying but they seamed so familiar. She stood up walked over the men. They looked over when she stood up, “ah” the guy with black hair said “hello Willow”. Willow looked at him for a while but had never met him before, “how do you know my name”? Willow heard a crunch behind them, she looked back at the forest and saw Lavender. I guess Aurora didn't tell you yet? Well you guardian can turn into a human when they want to use their powers but also when they want to talk with you. “OK” Willow said recognizing the guys in the clearing, “so that's how you know my name she” said to the boy with black hair, “yes I’m Wiccan” he said in response. “Well then” Willow said “what are your powers”? My powers are to control darkness and lighting.
The next day Willow and Lavender were gathering food when Lavender snapped her head over to a bush. Willow stood up to walk over to the bush but Lavender grabbed her arm to stop her. “I have a bad feeling about this” Lavender said sternly, a rustle came from the bush again and out popped a white birch snowling. The bird had a piece of paper tide to its back. Willow crawled over to the bird and untied the paper It read “South to ugimory town there you will find your next guardian and a guardian owner.”Willow looked at Lavender who was still reading to paper, Willow picked some nuts from to basket and gave them to the bird. The bird chirped and flew of, “I guess we should go to ugimory” Lavender said.
Walking down the path to ugimory a bright flash popped up over Willows head, she looked up at it when she realized a path of fire fly's was up in the sky. Willow, Wiccan, Lavender and Tempest were half way to ugimory, “I think we should set up camp here” Willow said, Lavender agreed and Wiccan and Tempest nodded. Willow was drifting of to sleep a thought about her next guardian, “hmm I wonder what animal it will be” she said and fell asleep.
Sky Lights
Chapter 2
Ugimory was a small, quaint town but was very technologically advanced. The houses were durable and strong made of sakura wood. The crops were healthy every year all month long. The food and dishes were savory and freshly made. The forest on the mountain that towers over the town, when the Fire fly moon rises a strange light a beam of red Light shoots out of the of the statue up there. Willow and her friends are going up to the mountain the night before the fire fly moon to see the beam of light up close. “I wonder what will happen tomorrow night” Lavender said, That night just before the fire fly moon rose the glow din,t come up from the ground but down from the sky, and what followed was a boy with a mask of gold upon his face and from the glow Willow could see that his hair had an orange tinge to it, he was wearing a cape that covered his whole body behind him was a Golden Fighter owl. “Who are you” Willow said “my name is Titus” the boy responded, Willow heard a scratching sound behind her, she turned around to see what it was. A petite Red Panda was stumbling to her, the Panda chirped when Willow picked her up “I think I,ll call you Ruby” she said and hugged Ruby. She could feel Ruby getting warmer, when she opened her arms a short girl with long wavy red hair popped out. She was wearing a white short sleeved overall dress, a red shirt and black boots, she looked up at Willow wide eyed. Little glints of gold shone in her eyes “I,m your new guardian, my power is to control fire and its at its max when the Fire Fly Moon is in the sky”. “And this is precious” Titus said. Willow, Lavender, Wiccan, Tempest, Ruby, Titus and Precious fell silent when the glow dimmed and faded away, everybody went back to town.
Late at night Willow woke up to see Ruby standing at the side of her bed , “Willow, I had a bad dream”. Willow looked at her and said “you look like a little kid and act like one to, yes you can sleep with me”, Ruby snuggled under the covers and fell asleep.
Next morning Willow came down stairs to Ruby chasing Wiccan around the room and Tempest swatting at Precious, Willow put her hand on her head and yelled “OK, EVERYBODY CHANGE IN TO THEIR HUMAN FORMS RIGHT NOW” Titus and Lavender looked at her and laughed. Ruby, Wiccan, Tempest and Precious looked at her reluctantly changed in to a human. Willow had never seen Precious,s human form, she had short choppy hair that didn’t match her golden gown and silver makeup. For breakfast they had french toast and trenta berry juice. Making their way out of town Willow wondered if how many guardians she would get before her journey ended, thinking of the places she would go after her family's curse was broken. Her life at the top of mount futji was nice but she would love to go to city's and other places. Titus broke her train of thought by saying “the next place to go is Tantoris Bay,” he said. “well OK” willow said” and of they went
* * *
Ruby whined when the water splashed her fur. “oh don’t be such a bay” Wiccan said as he splashed in the waves “you know that I don’t like water as much as you do” Ruby said back. Tantoris Bay was south east of Ugimory town, crystal blue waves crashed on the golden sand. No messenger came to direct Willow or tell her what to do, though she might have an idea. Legends are told that on the east side of the beach a temple stands in ruin, in the evening turtles crawl out of the sea to form a circle around the temple. But the people that have encountered it were to scared to stay and see what happens.
Tiny crabs popped in and out from there holes in the sand as Ruby, Wiccan and Tempest ran around trying to catch them. Willow and her friends were sitting under a cluster of palm trees to stay dry as rain fell down around them. Precious was perched on a branch above them. “perhaps we should be setting up camp closer to the ruins” said Lavender “no, the ruins are only a minutes walk away form here” willow responded. After dinner Willow got up and started to walk over to the ruin. The sun was setting and as it set the water turned golden. Little mosaic sea turtles crawled out of the sea on to the sand over to the ruins. The ruins looked like a temple made out of pearl. On the sand in the ruin a girl about the same age a fawn. Her hair was tied up in in a bun with seaweed, her cloths were just a simple toga and belt. Slowly walking over to the ruins Willow knelt down near the girl, her hair looked like water but when Willow felt it her hand was still dry. The turtles slowly crawled over to the girl and surrounded her in a circle. The girls hair slowly engulfed her to form a bubble, Willow crawled over to the bubble to look in side but before Willow could get their the bubble popped and the girl woke up.
“nngh” the girl said as she stirred and sat up “who are you” the girl said surprised. “I,m Willow, and you are”? “Oh I’m Sheliya. Do you know where my turtle is”? Just then a big blue Treshia turtle crawled out of the waters and crawled over to Sheliya and stopped next to her. The turtle cooed and put it,s head on Sheliya,s lap. “Your turtle is very cute” Willow said quietly “thank you” she replied smiling “his name is Ocianus”.
When Willow, Sheliya and Ocianus returned to camp, Wiccan came bounding over to Willow and jumped on her in greeting. Willow fell over onto the sand with a thud, “are you OK” Sheliya asked standing over her. “I don,t get, I just don,t get it” “you don,t get what” “well, when Wiccan was living with me at my house he was not as play full or energetic. Maybe being in nature or going on an adventure with me ignited that spark” Sheliya looked over at Wiccan who was playing in the water with Ocianus “maybe, maybe….” she trailed of.
The sun was setting when every had finally finished dinner, “I,m going to walk down to the water” Willow said after helping clean up. Willow was standing at the edge of the water thinking about her parents when a King Orca jumped out of the water and swam up to her, a golden light surrounded the King Orca and after the light faded away a boy that seemed to be just older than Willow her self was standing in the place of the King Orca. Blue hair tied in a braid came down to his ankles, a gold grown adorned with sapphire sat comfortably on his head. He was also wearing a navy jacket with golden embroidered sea animals on it, a white shirt was underneath the jacket, he wore gray fitted pants with brown gold toed boots on his feet. “I am Hadrian Opel Deritelosan IV, Hadrian for short. “I have come to be your next spirit guardian”. Walking back to camp Willow stopped looking back at the crystal blue water shining with hints of gold. Thinking how much her life has changed science that day she had saw Wiccan for the first time. When Willow and Hadrian got back to camp Willow introduced everybody to Hadrian. Suddenly water droplets gathered in the sky above everyone to form a beautiful woman floating in the sky. “I am Aquanala”.
Chapter 3
Willow was to surprised to do anything but stare. Her mind was racing to fast to do anything except stand there. Wiccan was the one to snap her out of her trance by barking like crazy. The Goddess pointed at her and said “You are the one to free our world of the darkness surrounding it”. What is she talking about Willow thought, I’m just here to free my family of our curse. “Lavender, what is she talking about. I’m here to break the curse put on my family by the Aurora Bear” Willow asked Lavender, “what your not here to help defeat the Wolf King”? Lavender responded. “I don,t think so, and who is the Wolf King”? Wiccan stopped barking and walked over to Willow, he sat down next to her, Ruby did the same along with Hadrian. Each of the Ark Guardians eyes glowing with magic, darkness, fire and water surrounded Willow and joined to form a weapon of magic. A bright flash of light engulfed Willow, floating above the sand appeared a diamond staff in front of Willow. Adorned with gold and vines that wrapped there way up the staff. “Whoa” gasped Willow “what
is this”. The Goddess vanished with out answering Willows question and leaving Willow and her friends in silence.
All standing in circle staring at each other trying to process what just happened and why Willow was now holding a magic staff. Titus was the first one to speak “ Willow, when you said that you were just here to break a curse. What did you mean by that”?
“ Well. My parents told my that the Aurora bear put a curse on my family. But now I’, m questioning that as well of most of the things my parents told my and why I never thought of why the Aurora bear would want me to break the curse in the first place, if she was the one to put the curse on my family”. Responded definitely now lost in thought. “I have no idea what just happened” Sheliya said obviously perplexed as much as everybody else. Lavender yawned which triggered a chain reaction with every body else, “I guess its time to turn in for today” Willow said.
In the morning Willow and Wiccan took a walk on the beach. Willow really didn't want to but Wiccan had ran around barking and jumping on Willow to make her wake up, for a wolf 6:00 was never to early for a. It was summer so the morning wasn’t really that cold but the water was a little. Looking away from the water to see Wiccan running back from half way up the beach with practically a branch in his mouth, trotting up to Willow and placing the branch at her feet “uuuuugh. Wiccan I am not playing fetch with you”! Wiccan whimpered at Willow “Some times I forget you have a human form”. Willow picked up the stick and tried to through it but it was tad to heavy. “Look Wiccan, the stick is to heavy for me, so I cant play with you. Go see if any body else is awake and play with them.” Wiccan whimpered and walked of
I f any of you have ideas for more of the story or want to draw the characters, do that here.
--- May your nights be dark and your pencils not break ( it happens and it is really frustrating if you just sharpened it) Reuby Moonnight.

submitted by Reuby Moonnight, age 11 nebulas, Lunaitaria
(March 1, 2022 - 5:07 pm)

This is really cool and compelling, Reuby!  

I have a proposal for you; can I edit/critique/give suggestions for each part when released?  If so, do you mind if I'm a little nitpicky?  And of course, all my suggestions are subjective and you can take them or leave them... 

submitted by Tsuki the Skywolf
(March 2, 2022 - 12:42 pm)
submitted by TOP
(March 2, 2022 - 5:38 pm)

Sure. Go ahead. I mean thats why i put it up ( akso because it was just sitting on my computer) but yeah.

submitted by Reuby Moonnight, age 11 nebulas, Luanaitaria
(March 2, 2022 - 5:54 pm)

Alright, I'mma edit the first two paragraphs for now.

>>>>> Perhaps the story could start off with what Willow is writing in her preexisting diary after a frustrating day feeling like people don't understand her family... like, instead of it being a new diary and her explaining herself, something like:

Monday (or any other day, just thought it'd be cool to put a day up here)

Everyone thinks being the tribal cheif's daughter is soooooo great, but they're families aren't cursed by the Aurora Bear, like ours.  And they don't have to deal with the burden of being the one whose duty it is to break the curse.  My parents don't understand either; it's only every other generation the goddess allows.  Lucky them.

You could also try to put some of her personality in the diary too-- the one above represents a person who is spiteful about the curse, and who hates being the one who has to break it.  If Willow's excited about breaking the curse, it might be drastically different and hopeful and excited.  Or if she's insecure, it might focus on the fact that her classmates envied her and how that made her feel.  Sneak in some of the important plot points where you can, but mostly focus on it sounding natural for her character, and put the diary entry in italics.  If you'd like to follow that suggestion, you could start the next paragraph with an indent and then "Willow set aside her diary when she heard her dad calling her for dinner."  If Willow doesn't know what the curse actually is, write about why she doesn't know and how she feels about it.  If she does, write about how it affects their family.

>>>>> Start a new paragraph & indent when Willow's mother talks, and again when Willow replies.  Add "Good," Willow said, glancing down at her [describe the outfit here] [describe how she feels about it].  She took a bite of her white rice and anko paste, thinking.  Or, if  she doesn't really care about her uniform, say, "Good," Willow said, barely glancing at the [describe outfit] she was wearing as she took a bite out of her white rice and anko paste. 

>>>>> Start another paragraph when she asks the question about the curse, and if she doesn't know what it is maybe ask what it is instead of why.  They've probably gone over this a time or two, so maybe give the mom an impatient sigh and a comment that isn't actually helpful.  Remember to start a new paragraph and indent when someone speaks.  

>>>>> Maybe replace the sentence with "Willow pushed the question out of her mind, hurriedly finishing her dinner to get back to her diary."

>>>> Start a new paragraph, indent, and use italics for her diary entry.  It might read better if you removed "Hello again" and replaced the next part with "Today we had anko paste for dinner. It’s made out of sweet red beans which [describe the taste and what it means to Willow,maybe use a few metaphors?] Tomorrow is my first day of school and I’m taking my spirit test, which is when the chief’s child takes a test to see what their guardian animal is. [Describe her anticipation, nervousness, indifference, or any other emotion regarding the test.]I hope mine is either a wolf, fox, or a panther!"  You could also either take out the "Bye" entirely or replace it with something about her wanting to sleep/read/whatever.

Like I said-- these are just suggestions which you can add or not, and I'm making every suggestion I can think of to make the story even better than it already was.  If you want me to continue suggestions with the rest of the story, I can!  And if you don't, that's fine too.

submitted by Tsuki the Skywolf
(March 3, 2022 - 6:41 pm)

Sure, i will make some of those change. thank you.

submitted by Reuby Moonnight, age 11 nebulas, Lunaitaria
(March 4, 2022 - 7:21 am)

Hi Reuby Moonlight, I enjoyed your story! My favourite part was when Willow saw the Aurora Bear goddess for the first time. The description was so beautiful there. I like Willow and Wiccan especially. For more of the story, unless you have it planned otherwise, the stick that Wiccan brings Willow at the end of this section could actually be something not a stick, like, I don't know, a magic wand, or that sort of thing, that could help them in their travels. And also, you might want to take some time to develop the characters you have already before introducing new ones.

Happy writing! (And I totally get the pencils thing-it's so frustrating!) 

submitted by Flamarestii
(March 11, 2022 - 3:17 pm)

@Flamestarii, thank you! I enjoy describing this very much, i am in the process of making the cover of the book. So before the stick part willow gets a staff from the water goddess of water ( i cant remember her name), but mabye instead of the goddess giving it to her Wiccan finds it. But yes i should develop  Willow before i add anymore characters. Also I just like to write scenes of Willow and Wiccan, when he acts like a dog.

submitted by Reuby Moonnight, age 11 nebulas, Luanaitaria
(March 12, 2022 - 10:24 am)