101 things that

Chatterbox: Pudding's Place

101 things that

101 things that would annoy Gollum. This was Gollum's idea, I don't claim to have thought it up, but I thought it was a GREAT idea.

1. Tell him you are going to take him to get fish, and take him to a fish and chips place.

2. Propose to him and when he sees the ring in your hands and takes it, say "So does ths mean you want to marry me?"

3. Take him to a restaurant and let him watch how food is prepared.

4. Tell him that he won a all expense paid cruise to Mordor.

5. Tell him that the other winners include Sam, the witch king of Angmar, and a whole battilion of orcs.

6. Get a bucket full of imitation rings of power and throw the precious in.

7. Throw the precious into Mt. Doom.

8. Take him to a Elvish feast and force him to eat. 

9. Tell him that the elves miss him.

10. Tell him Deagol misses him. 

submitted by Listening Daisy, A coast somewhere
(July 8, 2012 - 1:45 pm)

back to the Pudding's Place

11. Cook rabbits in front of him.

submitted by Deagol, Middle Earth
(July 8, 2012 - 3:45 pm)

TOP! TOP! TOP!

submitted by TOP!, age TOP! TOP!
(July 8, 2012 - 3:59 pm)

Top. And, just pointing out, some of these things (namely 8) are rather... Well... Mean, not just annoying.

submitted by Tiffany W.
(July 8, 2012 - 9:39 pm)

I am sorry, for writing before thinking.

submitted by Listening Daisy, A coast somewhere
(July 8, 2012 - 10:25 pm)

Re: #6: He would pick it out easily.

submitted by Emily L.
(July 8, 2012 - 10:27 pm)

Yeah, he would. He's got some radar.

submitted by Saz
(July 8, 2012 - 10:35 pm)

12: Ask him if he's related to Yoda or Dobby.
13: Steal his precious. (It worked when Bilbo did it!)
14: Beat him in a riddle contest. (same!)
15: Mimic his mode of speech to a ridiculous extreme to deliberately confuse him.
16: Tell him you heard he liked fish, and ask him if he's ever tried fillet mignion. (sp?)

submitted by Emily L.
(July 8, 2012 - 10:42 pm)

17. Tell him that in English, his name would translate to swallow.

***

I was just feeling random when I said that, but this is actually really funny. 

submitted by Gollum
(July 9, 2012 - 8:53 am)

18. Tell him the egg riddle, and when he says eggs, say "NO! It's a treasure chest!"

19. Bring him to a jewelry store and tell him that the ring is so 3000 years ago; he needs a new one!

20. Do your best Gollum voice at him. (I can actually do it pretty well. It probably has something to do with Lord of the Rings being my first PG 13 movie. I watched it when I was three.) 

submitted by Gigi
(July 9, 2012 - 5:37 pm)

@#20. Same here. I grew up on a steady diet of Lord of the Rings movies. I first read the books when I was 6, albeit not really understanding them.

submitted by Sakura C., age 13, Mines of Moria
(July 22, 2012 - 1:09 pm)

22. Make him watch Shugo Chara <--- most girly and ridiculous anime ever

submitted by Tiffany W.
(July 9, 2012 - 8:26 pm)

Yes! Yes! So evil! *dies laughing* 

The really funny thing is I was forced into watching Shugo Chara! after doing too many Gollum/Voldermort/Galbatorix/other antagonist impersonations.

*sobs*  

submitted by Sakura C., age 13, Seiyo Acadamy
(July 22, 2012 - 1:07 pm)

These are hilarious!

Here's mine-

23)  Introduce him to Feanor.  

24)  Pity him.

25)  Tie him up.

26)  Whenever he says something, repeat it in a chipmunk voice.

 

 

 

submitted by Mattie, District 12, Panem
(July 10, 2012 - 9:19 am)

27. Tell him he needs new rags (i.e. take him shopping for clothes)

28. Leave him in a old age home 

submitted by Listening Daisy, A garden somewhere
(July 13, 2012 - 12:17 pm)