Regular poetry thread

Chatterbox: Pudding's Place

Regular poetry thread

Regular poetry thread (because I'm tired of not editing my poems)

This is exactly what it sounds like! A thread to post poetry. I'm excited to read all of your work!

submitted by Bluebird
(April 30, 2017 - 8:51 pm)

Wow, this is amazing, Ruby! I love the repetition 

submitted by September
(July 7, 2017 - 3:47 pm)

I don't have the words for what this piece did to me. (And you say I'm a good writer?)

submitted by Violet, age 16, Cawdor
(July 8, 2017 - 2:19 pm)

Thanks for finally getting me to write, you guys! *hugs*

lost and found / traveller

i. my compass is pointing just north of reality

way south of normality

ii. i tried following the north star but it

disappeared behind a cloud

iii. you told me to turn around

iv. lost my map in the bermuda triangle 

and my crooked sense of morality

v. so different from you

vi. watch out, you said, i’m coming for you

closing in, i can feel the fog

vii. hello, no

goodbye

viii. i found the only thing i wanted to lose

ix. you caught me by the throat

x. you can make me stare at the sun

but i am the child of the moon

 

submitted by Booksy Owly
(July 6, 2017 - 12:04 pm)

Ooh, Booksy! I really love that one, it's short but it says a lot!

submitted by Leafpool
(July 7, 2017 - 1:22 pm)

Booksy, I love this! My favorite line is: my compass is pointing just north of reality/way south of normality!

submitted by September
(July 7, 2017 - 4:02 pm)

Here's a poem I entered for Booksy's poetry contest. I decided to write it because I was inspired by Lake Michigan, which we've been visiting for three years. This year will be our fourth, and we're leaving in a week. I'm so ready! I would love critique and/or title suggestions!

I'm dreaming

Of an indigo lake

It might as well be an ocean

Because the water stretches out forever

I can't see the end. 

I'm longing

For an indigo lake

That touches the sky

Again. 

I'm dreaming 

Of standing on the shore

While the playful waves kiss my toes

And bury my feet in sand.

I'm longing

For standing on that shore

The sky and the water 

Hand in hand. 

I'm dreaming 

Of running on the shore

Chasing the sun

As it sinks below the water. 

I'm longing

To watch the gulls

As they fly away,

Away to the sun. 

I'm dreaming

Of wading deep

Into the dark waters

Watching the moon come up

Touching the stars.

I'm longing

For the midnight chills

When the fog rolls in

It's no wonder 

they call this lake great

It goes so far. 

I'm dreaming 

Of an indigo lake

It might as well be an ocean

Because the water stretches out forever

I can't see the end. 

 

submitted by Leeli
(July 8, 2017 - 2:08 pm)

I'd love some critique on this, and also a title suggestion: 

I'm trying to decide between Armory/Armorie and Weapon Girl

eyes like security cameras

mascara blades fly when we bat our eyelashes 

watching watching following, we know threats 

when we see them maybe not at 

first glance but we know, we know. 

voice like cut steel, lipstick doubles as war paint

because looking powerful is feeling powerful 

hair pulled back into sleek ponytails, uniformity

is key because when they see, they  will know

fists like stones, nail polish leaves colorful scratches

sweatshirts and jeans have no chinks, impenetrable

armor is crucial, and stilettos make excellent combat boots. 

we don't need weapons, we are blades that we can

wield ourselves, we're silent assassins, we're here

to protect when the world can't seem to stand up for those

who need it most.  

submitted by September
(July 8, 2017 - 4:15 pm)

ooh, I like it! The concept is very interesting, and the metaphors are all awesome. I like Weapon Girl. 

submitted by Leeli
(July 8, 2017 - 7:40 pm)

Thanks, I'm leaning towards that as well! 

submitted by September
(July 9, 2017 - 1:55 pm)

BASED ON ACTUAL EVENTS THAT HAPPENED TODAY!!!

Swim

You'd think,

After someone rammed
Right into you
Head-on,

At least someome would ask
"Are you okay?"

You'd think,

After Coach Bryan said
"Clean up the pool deck,
Pick up all the boards and buoys,"

At least someonw would ask,
"Do you need help?"

Of course you would.

But that never happens.

And there they are,
Giving me
What they call
"Sympathy"

After I tell them
What THEY did.

Making me go last
Won't make me stronger
Because past a steel fence,
Behind a stone wall,
And though a mile-thick skin,
I am weak.

So when I get to the wall,
I empty the tears in my goggles out
Underwater.

So after I'm done picking up
Thirteen boards and eight buoys,
I hold in my tears until I get my towel.

So they'll never see my cry.

Swimming is torture,
But getting new times
And earning points for SSC

Makes every second worth it. 

~~~~~~~~

Here's another instance where I pour all my feelings out into a poem. 

submitted by Lucy B., age 13, California
(July 11, 2017 - 8:15 pm)

This needs to top! Don't you die on me, poetry thread. To the top! 

submitted by Leaftop!, age Top-teen, The TOP of the forest
(July 16, 2017 - 12:44 pm)

I haz really deep poem

Sure, I guess,
Ignorance is bliss

But why
Am I

The one that's set aside?

I try to make
Myself not look fake

But it's hard
When you've been marred

And you feel so scarred

I'm too nice
To hearts that are like ice

It all feels
Too real

Maybe it's time to seal the deal

I'm a mess,
I'll confess

I'm not keen,
I believe

A notice is a need

You say,
If I may,

That you'll miss me
If I leave

But that's not what I see

So what will the truth be? 

submitted by Lucy B., age 13, California
(July 19, 2017 - 10:41 pm)

Finally I've written something! Hah, it seems like when I write about poet's block I don't have it anymore.

Untitled

my mind is a dry ditch without any water

to fill it and i'm so lonely so lonely

so lonely

where do i find the words to write if i didn't

have any to begin with?

poets' block is like a drought, water is

words but there isn't water or words here

i'm falling, falling

drowning in the water that isn't there

how can you drown in a nonexistent lake, that's the question

i'm dying i'm dying

to some people poet's block is deadly poison and it kills them

i'm so thirsty

i need water i need words i need something unexplainable, something like inspiration but not quite

but no one seems to want to help i'm so lonely

 

submitted by Leafpool, age Eternal, Hidden in the forest
(July 20, 2017 - 9:55 am)

Bravo, LeafPool!!

submitted by Lucy B., age 13, California
(July 20, 2017 - 10:58 am)

Thank you! BTW, it's a lowercase p.

submitted by Leafpool
(July 21, 2017 - 11:54 am)