Chatterbox: In This Month's Issue

HELLO EVERYONE! 

It’s your six-in-one source of fun Floof Industries! Alas, it seems that our vacay has come to an end, because the month of August is here to stay for 31 days! Sad, I know (unless you are a parent), but you at least have one thing to look forward to. Since the traverse from July to August is a traverse from one month to the next, that means it is time for...

THE FLOOF INDUSTRIES MONTHLY CHECK-UP!

For this month’s MCU, we promise you tips on how to rock the first day of school, suggestions for a revision to the calendar, August funnies from TWO Floof employees (co-managers Fleet and Cats Claw), and recognition of Fangirls, memers, and hay-throwers in the CBer awards!

 Without further Ado, let us begin this month's MCU with the largest save the date you've ever seen:

IMPORTANT DATES BY BARNSWALLOW!!

Month of August:

-National Golf Month

-National Picnic Month

-Water Quality Month

 

Weeks of August:

-Week 1-National Simplify Your Life Week

-Week 2-National Smile Week

-Week 3-Friendship Week

-Week 4-Be Kind to Humankind Week

 

Days of August: 

August 1-National Mountain Climbing Day 

August 2-National Ice Cream Sandwich Day  

August 3-Campfire Day

August 4-Friendship Day

August 4-International Forgiveness day

August 9-Book Lover's Day

August 10-Lazy Day

August 10-National S'mores Day 

August 12-Middle Child's Day

August 13-Left Handers Day

August 16-National Tell a Joke Day

August 17-National Honey Bee Awareness Day

August 19-National Potato Day

August 21-Senior Citizens Day

August 26-National Dog Day

August 26-Women's Equality Day

August 30-Toasted Marshmallow Day

August 31-International Bacon Day 

 

(Source-Holiday Insights) 

That is all for our Important Dates! Now, for our next *cough cough* best * sector:

OUR LMWAY!

(Last Month We Asked You)

Here’s a fun fact: the original calendar didn’t have August OR July; they were added in a revision, after Julius Caesar and Augustus. This is why Last Month We Asked You: If you could change one thing about the calendar, what would it be?

YEAR are your best answers!

Luna Starr said: If I could change one thing about the calendar, I would ERASE FEBRUARY 29 AND LEAP YEAR FROM EXISTENCE!!! But don't ask me how, I have no idea.

SpiffJith said: OK, so this is kind of hard to explain, but ya know how "Septem" means seven but September is actually the ninth month? I would change it so that the first month of the year is March, and therefore the months September-December would actually be labeled correctly.

Alizarine said: You know what's really funny? The months January through August were named after gods/goddesses, words having to do with the seasons, or famous rulers; and then I guess they got kind of lazy and were like "Uh, I dunno, how about we just name the next month 'seventh month'?"

So maybe we should change all of them to latin number-month names because I'm pretty sure Julius Caesar is too- uh, stabbed to care if we rename his month.

But then November would have to change to "Undecember" and that sounds really weird so maybe my idea won't actually work... XD

 

And finally, Kitten said: I would change the calendar to have 13 4-week-long months (plus an extra day at the end) instead of 12 29/30/31-day-long months, which is just confusing.

 

 

 

That’s it for our LMWAY! Oh my, look at the time! It’s 11:52! That doesn’t mean anything, but it is a not-so-glamorous transition to the fact that it is time for... 

AUGUST JOKES!

1st joke: What do you call the fork who was emperor for one month? August-tine!

~submitted by Catsclaw

Knock knock! 

Who's there? 

August!

August who?  

August of wind just blew July away!

Whoops! Sorry, here's my two more: 

Q: Why did the panda go to Home Depot on an August day? 

A: To buy a bear conditioner. 

 

Knock, knock! 

Who's there?

August!

August who? 

August ate a jellybean!

~All submitted by Fleet

 

Great jokes, don’t you think? Anyway, now it’s time for our Month-related advice bit! For August, grab your number 2 pencil, because the theme is…

HOW TO ROCK YOUR FIRST DAY!

 here are some tips:

 Nyx said:  One question: Would a shirt with a picture of Darth Vader and the words, "HUMBUG! Merry Sithmas!" count as "striking and memorable"?

SpiffJith said: If you see new kids, don't just ignore them, but smile at them and if they look around your age introduce yourself and your friends.

And Finally, Luna Starr said: Stride in with your head up, shoulders back, small yet confident smile. Only use one backpack strap, it looks cool and you don't ever have to do it again if you hate it. Wave to people you know. Wear striking and memorable clothes that you love, but aren't absolutely horrendous. (there is a difference between "unique" and "a fashion explosion".) If someone makes fun of you, you can a) ignore them or if you just can't take them anymore b) say something like "Wow, really? Thank you!" or "I didn't know that, thanks for telling me!" ect. Something sarcastic that will catch them off guard and confuse them, but not harm them.You got this!*

(*Please note that Luna-Starr may not do any of the above listed things. For one, Luna-Starr attends a school with uniforms, so the whole "awesome look" thing is already out the window. Thank you for understanding Luna-Starr's situation.)

Great tips, everyone! And now, drumroll please, because it is time for...

CBer AWARDS!!!

Alright Luna-Starr, show us your stuff!!

Best unintentional meme makers: 

Ella Starburst and Alizarine!

 

Why: Guys. The McDonald's Fireflies? I took a screenshot of that beautiful thing. It is glorious. Thank you for this, I'll be laughing about it forever. ^^

 

Best opponent in a hay fight: 

Rogue Wilding!

 

Why: Aaahh, my friend, our hay fights continue. You and the Outcasts never surrender or give up on the fight. It has been an honor to throw virtual hay at you.

 

Best Fangirl: 

Leafy!

 

Why: What can I say? I love what a hardcore Marvel (*cough cough* Thor *cough cough*-- sorry, just seems like a little something got stuck in my throat!) fangirl you've become. I always smile at your Random Thoughts posts.

And that is all for the CBer awards! Finally, the moment you all (definition of all: Floof) have been waiting for, the...

LOCATION OF THE MONTH!!!

 We only had one submission this month, But we will still talk about it!

Our submission, and our Location of the Month, is….

HEADS UP HIGH

Why: To be honest, even if there was competition, we would have picked this one! It definitely captures Floof's optimism and positivity, and we also love the alliteration! Great job!

That is all for this Month’s monthly check-Up! Now for our LMWA-wait, is there even anything fun in this Month?

Not besides Labor Day.

But I'm using that for the Advice column, I can't copy!

I HAVE AN IDEA!!!!!!

ANDREA WHAT THE EXCLAMATION POINT?!

September is a very boring month holiday-wise, so we need to spice it up a bit! So here's the LMWAY:

If you could create a holiday for September, what would you create?

That's… actually really good!

Kudos, Andrea.

YAY I DID GOOD!!!!

Leave your answers in the comments below, And we’ll put them in when it’s Monthly check-up time!

Thank you all for waiting for this and an extra big thank-you to our contributors! Remember to put September-themed things in the comments!

Here is what we’ll accept:

Important dates

September jokes 

Location of the Month

How to Make the Most of Labor Day! (Because it's the only good part of September *cough cough* besides the song by Earth, Wind, and Fire *cough cough*)

LMWAY answers

CBer awards!

And we still have open spots for Floof Employees!

Of course, you will be just an employee, and you will have six bosses, two of which represent my left and right brain, three of which are CAPTCHAs, and only one is real, but hey, it’s Floof! 

Your job as a Floof Industries employee will be to collect info from your category. You can do it from all sources: friends, books, websites, anywho, just make sure if you use a website or book, you include that source. Your quota is at least three things in your category; if this is not met by the date of the next MCU, you will be fired. You can be re-hired tho.

Here’s your submission template:

Name:

Category you would like to work in ( Advice Column, Jokes, Awards, Important dates,):

Why you wanna work here:

Favorite Meme (yes this is important):

Pinecones: thoughts? Y/N: 

Favorite Floof Member:

What do we want:

When do we want it:

What would you do for a Klondike bar:

 

Please post all of your submissions on a separate post tagging Ella Starburst or Floof.

Thank you in advance to all who join! 

Thank you for taking time out of your busy day to read this MCU! We also have another announcement: Something new from Floof Industries is coming to town! What is it, you ask? Well, for that info, you’ll have to check our previous post for clues! Although we will give you ONE piece of info: This new sector will be a hotspot for one-on-one roleplays…

Thank you, Admins, for being patient with this incredibly long post. 

We hope you all have an Awesome August!

‘Till the next check-up,

Floof Industries.

submitted by Floof Industries , Heads up High
(August 2, 2019 - 4:11 pm)

Yay, I'm hired! Thank you so much. And it's totally ok. 

submitted by Leo
(August 5, 2019 - 5:36 pm)

Luna-Starr, I thank you for your mention of me. You are an amazing frienemy, and I look forward to each hay fight round with you. *Plucks hay flower out of hair and gives it to Luna with a polite bow*

submitted by Rogue Wildling
(August 5, 2019 - 12:59 pm)

Thank you for the Floof posts! I absolutely love reading them c:

submitted by Icy, age 14, The Forest
(August 6, 2019 - 1:59 pm)

LMWAY: I'd create a holiday about nature. Nature Day or something. Everyone could just enjoy all the natural beauty. Or I'd make the first day of school a standardized date and make it a holiday. You could have the day off from school and stuff. Oh, wait...

Joke: So, it's the first day of school, but Johnny is still in bed. His mother comes in to check on him.

Mom: Johnny, get up! You have to go to school!

Johnny: I don't want to go to school!

Mom: Why don't you want to go to school?

Johnny: I just don't. All the kids tease me. They call me names. And it's boring.

Mom: Well, Johnny, you have to go to school.

Johnny: Name two reasons why I have to go.

Mom: Well, you're thirty-seven, and you're the principal. 

submitted by Summer, age pi, Nowhere at all
(August 6, 2019 - 10:33 pm)

THIS MADE ME BURST OUT UGLY LAUGHING HOW DARE YOU

submitted by Ella Starburst, Heads up High
(August 8, 2019 - 10:12 am)

I'm glad I made you laugh, Ella! *takes a bow*

submitted by Summer, age pi, Nowhere at all
(August 8, 2019 - 6:23 pm)

Very nice!

So if the first day of school is a holiday, and you get it off, then the actual first day of school is the day after that, but then that’s a holiday, and you get it off, so then the ACTUAL first day of school is the day after that, but then that’s a holiday, and you get it off, ... so school doesn’t exist at all.

submitted by Kitten, Pondering
(August 8, 2019 - 7:26 pm)

This whole comment is so great I can't even thank you so much for this

submitted by Luna-Starr, age 27 eons, Existential Ponderment
(August 9, 2019 - 8:35 am)