Chatterbox: In This Month's Issue

Hello everybody!

***When are you gonna post and edit that worship video-

*SHSHSHSHHSH! SH! Shhhhh…..

Anyway, it's the first day of June, and not a lot can be confidently said about quarantine ends, but here's one thing I'm sure of: it's 

MCU TIME!

***that was awful.

SHUSH!

***You know what? Are our intros annoying? Should we even do them? Do people even read them? Does anyone even read-

IMPORTANT DATES!

JUNE IS NATIONAL ACCORDION AWARENESS MONTH (Majestic Mary, MM) AND PRIDE MONTH!

Jun. 1 - Appreciate Your Family Day (Strawberri) AND Milk Day (A.W) AANNDD Luna-Starr’s birthday (No you’re not fired!), ANNNNNNDDDDDDDD HeroesOfOlmpus’ birthday(HOO)!

AAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD FLIP A COIN DAY (M.M)

Jun. 2 - A Day, just like all the other June days (HOO)

Jun. 3 - World Cider Day

Jun. 4 - National Hug Your Cat Day

Jun. 5 - National Donut Day (MM)

Jun. 6 - D-Day AND Yo-Yo day! (MM)

Jun. 7 - Prince’s Birthday

Jun. 8 - National Best Friend Day

Jun. 9 - National Donald Duck Day

Jun. 10 - National Iced Tea Day

Jun. 11 - National Home from Work Day

Jun. 12 - National Loving Day

Jun. 13 - Cynthia Maple’s sister’s birthday! (Cynthia Maple)

Jun. 14 - Flag Day (Strawberri and MM)

Jun. 15 - Strawberri’s Birthday(Strawberri) AND Cynthia Maple’s Aunt’s birthday! (CM)

Jun. 16 - International Day of the African Child

Jun. 17 - Eat Your Veggies Day (MM)

Jun. 18 - International Panic Day AND Nursing Assisstants day! (MM)

Jun. 19 - Juneteenth!

Jun. 20 - Ice Cream Day AND Strawberri’s dad’s birthday!(Strawberri)

Jun. 21 - Father’s Day AND the Father’s Day HHG!

Jun. 22 - AW’s AND MM’s dads’ birthday(another computer to hack) (A.W + MM) as well National Onion Ring Day! (MM)

Jun. 23 - National Hydration Day

Jun. 24 - Joan B. of Arc’s birthday! (JBOA)

Jun. 25 - Starchaser’s Friend’s Birthday! (Starchaser)

Jun. 26 - Take Your Dog To Work Day (?? Indeed, MM)

Jun. 27 - National Bingo Day

Jun. 28 - National Insurance Awareness Day

Jun. 29 - Hug Holiday! And Wimbledon’s cool too, I suppose.

Jun. 30 - Meteor Day (MM)

Alrighty then, super fun, now it's time for our-

***LMWAY right?

Um...we are actually doing advice first this time.

***Won't the lack of continuity upset the viewers? Why are you even doing this anyway? {Gasp} was it because you accidentally switched-

THE FUNNIEST THING YOUR DAD HAS EVER DONE!

 Majestic Mary said: I dunno, maybe at dinner when he tells us stories about how vegetables grow and get their names. (Apparently potatoes grow on trees)

Luna-Starr said: He does lots of really memorable, goofy things, like makes funny faces, lurks in the backs of family pictures, talks to the dog in a funny voice, and does really long rasberries. But, owing to the fact that he has an extremely weird relationship with our dog, he once landed himself with an upside-down dog literally on top of him while we were watching church on the couch the other week. I don't know if that counts, but it was definitely funny!

HeroesOfOlympus said: Maybe the time when my cousins and I were playing video games at my grandma's house and he told us to stop soon and then farted really loud. 

*Sammy, I swear, if you say one more thing-

***I'm just saying what I'm thinking!

*have you ever thought that maybe, just MAYBE, you should shut your mouth!

***But-

*Shut up!

**No, Zeke. You shut up.

*...

***oHHHHHHHHH

OHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOO

Jun. JOKES!

What insect do you see in summer?

A junebug!

(MM)

I’m really glad I met my father. I swear, I’ve never Dad it so good.

 What did June say to July when they were freaking out?

Summer down!

Most dads don’t like it when kids play MCR at the highest volume, but it doesn’t Father my pops one bit.

Why should you never post a story on the Summer Solstice?

You’ll get a ton of heat mail!

What’s a dad’s favorite musical?

The Phantom of the Papa!

What did the sun say to the ice cube?

I’m warming you, don’t get too close!

This isn’t a joke, but if you’re ever bored, search up Unique Nicknames for Dad. You won’t regret it.

Every summer solstice, our local bank forgives every single sweat entirely. 

  

*AND YOU HONESTLY STILL THINK THAT I SHOULD SHUT UP?! REALLY? NO, C'MON, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? SAY IT!

**you wanna know something weird about this discussion, Zeke? You've just been yelling at me the whole time. If you'll allow me to explain myself-

*I have been.

No, you haven't-

*SHUT!

**YOU JUST SAID THAT TO ELLA!

*...

**Anyway, you guys really need to let it loose. Constantly trying to control every single thought

OUR LMWAY!
Last month we asked you: Here’s a volleyball the size of a globe. Do something AMAZING with it.

SurroundedByBooks said: Hmm...let's see. You can do a lot with a beach ball...but I'll fill it with water and freeze it. 

"Catch!" *screaming from cold hands and cracked skull*

Actually ignore that part....

(we did not, in fact, ignore it.)

Luna-Starr said: I'd probably get a whole bunch of people to sign it, add the date, then carefully put it in a chest and bury it somewhere. An MCU time capsule. 

HOO (HeroesOfOlympus) said: I would paint it rainbow, draw on it with Sharpie, and then keep it on a shelf and use it whenever. or it would go in a time capsule.

Strawberri said: I would paint 'Jesus loves you' on it in everylanguage on earth, because I think everyone should be able to know that. Then, I would send it into orbit around earth like a second moon.

**Anyway, you guys really need to let it loose. Constantly trying to control every single thought that appears in your mind will get you nowhere. It’ll just stress you out.

*But we can’t just accept everything Sammy and you say as the cold, hard truth!

**I know, but there are other alternatives than shutting down the whole brain in order to keep them out! Plus, I know for a fact that blocking out intrusive thoughts only makes them more prevelant.

*You obviously got that from Sanders Sides, but I’ll allow it because of your fine word usage.

**I’ve been reading. 

Glad they’re no longer fighting. Anyway, back to our regularly scheduled programming!

 

LOCATION OF THE MONTH!

Honorable mention: Jumping the pool, because two people posted it.

In third place, we have…

SUMMER STAY-CATION!

Why: For some reason, this makes me think of daises. However, Quarantine is kinda blippy in its endings all over the U.S, so we can’t really put this for an entire month.

In second place, we have…

RUNNING AROUND THE BACKYARD BECAUSE YOU’VE FINALLY GONE INSANE!Why:It’s just beautiful, but there’s no way we could make this fit without ruining its beauteous charm!

 

 

In first place, we have…

SWINGING IN A HAMMOCK!

Why: h a m m o c k

That’s it

 

*If we can’t force them out or just let them run, what can we do about anxious thoughts?

**That’s a good point. We barely know anything about the subject.

***I have an idea.

*Shu - no wait - nevermind - NO WAIT -

***Haha, the fear I cast on you everytime I speak makes me regret saying this, but I think it’s time our old girl did some research~

What does that - 

***CBER AWARDS!
NO SERIOUSLY WAIT - 

Awesome New Idea: Fidelity!

Why: The idea for a CB book club was very creative, and you managed to orchestrate it perfectly and make things work out really well. This was a very fun idea that was so well thought-out!

Best Returning-ish CBers: Claaws, Kyoto and Viola?!

Why: It's so great to see all of you again, even if it won't be for long! We're so grateful to have you back and we hope you'll all stay a while!! <3

Best new SI: Fermata/cerinthe!

Why: You made an awesome and popoular SI that many different people could participate! This was such a creative and fun new idea for an SI! Great job!

Our Friends We'll Miss: Nyx, Catsquill, and Porcelain Dragon

Why: Even if some of you aren't officially leaving, we're going to miss the company of all three of you guys. You've been good friends to us all and have offered so much to this community. We'll miss you and your impact and friendship will never be forgotten. <3 

 

**The June MCU has jalloped away!

***Did you speak just speak english?

*Make sure to comment for the next MCU!

Here’s what we’ll accept:

July jokes 

Location of the Month

Firework safety tips! (Please make them RIDICULOUS.)

LMWAY (All of you are designing the OFFICIAL FLOOF FIREWORKS FESTIVAL! Draw one firework each and we’ll rate them!)

CBer awards!

Important dates!

*Additionally, if you have any ideas for future advice columns or LMWAYs, PLEASE tell us! 

**We’re always accepting new ideas, because making the MCU is harder than it seems!

If yall have any suggestions, make sure to comment them! We appreciate it more than we can say!

Okay, but seriously, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN SAMMY I DON’T WANNA DO WORK

***Okay, we’ll do it for you then!

...you’re all me.

***Whoops.

Besides, Andrea will make a whole musical and Zeke will write his own scholarly paper with miles of purple writing.

***Anyway, here’s my idea: we all research some method on treating anxiety, and present our findings on the next MCU!

*That’s...a surprisingly good idea.

**Yeah!

Well, in that case…

TO BE CONTINUED


**ELLA ARE YOU SERIOUS
I’M TOO LAZY TO WRITE A REAL ENDING OKAY

submitted by Floof Industries , Swinging on a hammock
(June 1, 2020 - 12:13 pm)

Firework tips:

You must do it at 3:00 in the afternoon, only if there are no clouds and the sun is shining brightly. Then, make sure you have at least five freezer's worth of ice cubes, in case things get out of hand. Since they probably will get out of hand, cover the fireworks in all the ice in advance. Fourthly, take the longest match you can find, and stand on one foot as far away from the firework as possible. The one foot thing is in case you get too close, your firework setting off partner can grab your ankle and yank you to safety. (Did I mention you needed a partner? Well, you do.) Since you probably will need to be yanked to safety anyways, as soon as the firework is lit, your partner should immediately grab both of your feet and pull.

The End.

@Floof Industries, would you still like firework submissions? No one had submitted anything, so I wasn't sure. I can put mine in if you are.

Admin will not post anything interpreted as dangerous.

Admin 

submitted by Luminescence, age XI, California
(June 29, 2020 - 8:30 pm)

@Admin- oops. Yes, I can definitely see why that would be interpreted as dangerous.

@Floof Industries, disregard the firework drawing thing 

submitted by Luminescence, age XI, California
(June 29, 2020 - 10:01 pm)