Santa’s Annual Crime

Each year, he comes—
Silently.
Each year, he tiptoes
into my house—
Violently.
Quite honestly, I sincerely doubt
That it is desirable to have some fat guy wandering about!
While we all sleep unawares,
He could be climbing up the stairs!
Stealing our milk, cookies, sense of safety.
I think Santa’s been out of touch lately
With life in the real world, not at the North Pole.
He doesn’t get it—he lives in the cold with his elves and his coal!
The rest of us need our security
Not an obligation to deal with his immaturity!
For who but he takes pleasure in breaking and entering?!
Seems like Santa Claus needs a fair bit of lecturing.
Because of these grievances, because of these fears
I wish for only one thing this year—
Not a gift of any sort—
Just a date and a time for Santa Claus in court!