not joining (yet >:]) but i coincidentally wrote this today because i was bored (before i even saw this thread) so here's some advice for all of you world dominators

When attempting world domination, you must be patient. Patience, determination, logic, and dignity are all key factors to an effective takeover. In this guide, I will explain effective domination strategies for all your world-domination needs.

Section I: Start small.

When attempting a world domination, you may want to jump right in and do everything at once. You may want to slowly strategize and finally broadcast to the entire world that you are now its sole ruler, but that is not the best way to achieve effective world domination. Unless you have very limited time, it is best to take things slow. Appeal to smaller groups of people and gain support before trying to convince the entire world you are an ideal leader. You can start in small communities, both online and in-person, and eventually work your way to bigger groups and then the entire world. Just remember not to rush the process. As any seasoned world dominator knows, a rushed domination is a failed domination.

Section II: Use all advantages and don’t be afraid to mislead.

As we all know, all humans except for a select few are fairly unintelligent beings. However, they have a few qualities that help in the world domination process. The three advertising techniques are known as ethos, pathos, and logos, and these are all incredibly helpful. Ethos makes them trust you as a leader. Pathos makes them feel like they are better people by helping you. Logos may be the most useful. You may think, “I can’t use Logos, I’m not smart enough,” but the truth is that you don’t need to be. If you sound smart but are really speaking complete nonsense, the majority of people will think that the reason they do not understand you is because your level of knowledge is much higher than theirs. Truthfully, you may have even less knowledge than them, but you know how to manipulate people, and that’s what makes a difference.

Section III: Make people feel included.

A major reason why many people may join you is because they with to be a part of something, so you should give them exactly that. Let the people do the work for you. It’s a win all around- they feel helpful and support you more, you get more supporters, and you have to do practically nothing. 

Section IV: Do not ever appear flustered or upset in any way.

World domination relies on the people’s image of you, so you must keep this image perfect. If an opposing party says something offensive, you MUST NOT strike back. Do not fight fire with fire, fight fire with water. Remain calm and collected no matter what and deflect any insults. If they say something untrue, calmly tell them that they are factually incorrect and that you understand their misunderstanding. Always seem like you understand and are apologetic about not being clear enough, even if you could not have been clearer.

Using this guide, I truly hope that you find success in your attempt to rule the world. Use this guide in everything you do, both to dominate the world yourself and expose the strategies of others attempting the same. Now go, and remember: patience, determination, dignity, logic, lies, image, inclusion, press all advantages. Good luck.

That was really good advice fallen leaf. I will keep all of that in mind!

I suppose I’ll join Team Nighttime. Vive La Mushrooms!

*Begins to munch on a mushroom while staring at the chaos that reigns this thread* 

I'll join team NightTime, seeing my name is quite related. i♥