I'm just explaining

Chatterbox: Down to Earth

I'm just explaining

I'm just explaining something I feel needs to be said, and maybe I can get some help by the wonderful people on here... 

Lately, you may have noticed a sharp increase and then decrease in my attendance on CB, and I'm afraid to say this is applying to other parts of my life too. Before I go any further into this, I don't have depression and I don't ever do anything bad to myself. I know that for a fact. But I feel, just kind of... empty. Not bored, or sad, or angry, just... not there. On a Warriors community I'm on, I'll join projects and contests but never feel any motivation to do them. I want to, but somehow they just end up seeming like another impossible chore to do. Drawing is hard, takes up so much time, I feel like I never have enough for it. 

Schoolwork is another thing. Normally I'm fairly good with my homework and doing it over the weekend, but more recently I find myself procrastinating and putting things off and off until they're nearly due. And it's not anything particularily hard or challenging, but instead I waste all my time watching videos or just simply not doing anything at all, watching the minutes tick by. I hate it so much, because it means I have to scramble to get things done. I'm even consciously aware of myself doing this, and I want to stop it but I just can't seem to find any way to.

CB is the last thing. Over the past few weeks, I've tried to get more involved- join more AE threads, start a new solo write after my last cherished one finished, create threads and comments and contests and talk to people. But then I just... stopped. I can't seem to find any motivation to continue Et Tacet, I feel bored and unsatisfied with just trying to make a simple comment, and even though I adore CB pieces and never want to leave I just feel like I can't stick to anything or commit at all. I want to be able to break this- it's not a good habit, as mentioned above. I find I let threads sink to the bottom of CB, only for them to be revived by other faithful CBers. I feel so grateful, but at the same time... I can't. I feel like I just want them to go away and not remind me of the many things I have to do, even though they're interesting and fun and I wanted them to continue. My list of things I have to do is piling up, yet I never seem to be able to do them on time even though I have hours and hours over the weekened- I just let it all slip away. I don't like, I really really don't, but it's just like this heavy, dull feeling inside me that just saps everything fun out of. I've also been retreating to my room to be alone a lot more as of late, spending too much time on my bed in silence. 

So before I go, after I've said all of this, I want to ask you all... is there anything you can think of to help me with this? Do any of you have tips for breaking unmotivation or this chronic procrastination? At this point, a 'refreshing walk' or 'clearing my head' might not help so much, but if any of you have ever felt the same way as I am now I would love to hear your advice and help. You're all amazing people <3. 

Bye-bye for now~ 

submitted by Clouded Leopard, age Timeless, Southeast Asia
(April 16, 2017 - 8:03 pm)

I know exactly how you feel. I get like that a lot.

One thing that really helps me is to make a list. After I'm up and dressed and have eaten breakfast, and I don't have school, I say to myself, "Okay, Owl. These are things you're going to do today."

And I don't pack a lot in. For example, today my schedule was:

3 pm: do half your science hw.

4:30 pm: get started on your CW project.

5:00 pm: practice piano.

And that was it. But I got it all done and had time to spare to do whatever I wanted. Once, when I had a lot of stuff due, I even wrote down a whole list, though I did give myself time for breaks.

Indigo does something similar, though she doesn't put down times, just makes a huge list of what she wants to do and tries to get as much done as she can. I don't know which will work better for you, but I hope they help.

submitted by St.Owl, age Recarnated, Everywhere
(April 16, 2017 - 10:50 pm)
submitted by Top, please
(April 17, 2017 - 6:53 am)

This post is almost kind of...strange...because I'm having the exact same problem. 

No joke. It's really starting to get on my last nerves, the procrastinating, but it's so hard to break out of that habit.

So I guess in need advice too. XD

Im sorry for not being very helpful, Clouded Leopard, but I wanted to let you know you aren't alone. <3 

submitted by Killim
(April 17, 2017 - 9:21 am)

Wow, creepy, this must be some actual condition or something (condition just doesn't sound like the right word) because I have the same exact thing as well. I have yet to find a solution, so I guess I am here to hear what people have to say as well.

One thing you need to know, we are always here with you, no matter what! We all will find a solution, and I think Owl's might be really good. I tried being organized about my time in the past, but I'd even start losing motivation to make lists so it wasn't all that helpful in my mind. Ah well... 

submitted by Ashlee G., age 16, The Future
(April 17, 2017 - 10:57 am)

I honestly believe that all teenagers go through a phase such as this one at some point or another. I've just been drawn out of a funk like this one by having a change in scenery. My friends dragged me to a mall that I had never been to for a day and just getting out of town really lifted my levels of here-ness.

I hope this helps, but I can't confidently say that it will. I fully support you in every way and I've read your finished solo write and am reading your current one. Don't give up hope. Just chill and don't put too much pressure on yourself and everything will work itself out. I have faith in you! 

submitted by Aelin, Escaping Reality
(April 17, 2017 - 2:17 pm)

Wow. I felt exactly like this for a while....I'm pretty out of it now. Like, I can take those words and it would sound like exactly something I would say. I know I'm being repetitive :P but seriously literally every word from start to finish I can relate to. Gosh, you're good at describing things, or at least venting. :)

From doing not-hard assignments last minute to watch minutes tick by....I really know exactly what you mean. And it still happens sometimes. (It did yesterday :/)

I'm trying to think what the root of the problem was, and how it stopped.....I don't really know. The videos thing, that might be a part of it. That's what it was for me yesterday.....I just kept procrastinating ad procrastinating, and listening to music "in the background." But it really ended up disstracting me. So maybe you need to eliminate distractions, just tell yourself, "NO" and save it as like, a treat for after you finish what you need to do. It's much better to goof off when you have nothing better to do.

Also, it's actually satisfying/relaxing, whereas when you just sit around watching videos, no matter how funny or interesting they are, it's not satisfying, and it makes you feel kind of empty and tired, like a cloudy day. Then you keep doing it, and it goes in an endless loop....and then you have to pull yourself out of it and rush to do assignments. Well, maybe I should replace all those general "you"'s with "I."....but that's my relation to it.

I'll admit, going onto the CB right now may or may not be me procrastinating.....so I really shouldn't be typing this, but you're a friend and I really want to finish it.

 

--What I would reccommend is just telling yourself to stop. First of all, removing distractions. Don't get on YouTube for one second. Not to listen to "just one" video of a Broadway singer you love singing a random song you love (HEHEHE NOT ME hehehehe *cough*). I wouldn't even do it for music. Just don't. Doing what you want is a reward for after you do what you need to do.

--Write a list or a schedule out for yourself. If you want, you can divide one assignment into parts.....

(random example "research Mr. Historical Figure," "Get idea of how I draw Mr. Historical Figure" "write notes on Mr. Historical Figure"....I did that in a lot of words so you could understand but in reality you can write very briefly as long as you know what you're talking about)

....that way you can have a more specific list, and you can feel more accomplished! because you'll be checking more things off. The more big pinkish-purple check marks, the better for me :)

--Then just stick to it. Keep a refreshment nearby. (I always have a cup of water or iced tea or refreshing juice with a straw)

--If you need to take a break, take one....BUT not on the computer!!!! Then you will get sucked in and do it for way too long. Sit on a couch and rest, or sit outside for a few minutes. If you get lost easily (like, in time) then you can bring a watch or whatever. Or alarm clock if you think you'll fall asleep.....these are really random but the point of a good break is to turn your brain off and refuel, NOT give yourself a different thing for your brain to do. Reading can work sometimes....like if you're rereading something or reading something not very suspenseful.

I'm not expert on this, but I think it sounds right. 

--When you're feeling stuck, moving to another place helps.

--Brighten up wherever you are, if that makes you feel stimulated.

 

These are just some suggestions. You don't have to follow them all exactly, but I think some of them do help, at least for me.

If there's one you have a deep, strange resistance-like feeling to (not just kinda being like ehhhh I don't think I'll do that), like not using the computer when taking a break....hate to say it, but that's probably a sign that whatever you're opposed to is exactly what your problem is, and that you should do that suggestion.

Example: I got really annoyed once (ehh probably like weeks ago) when my mom asked me if I was being off-task, like inwardly annoyed, and when she suggested that I do something that doesn't require a computer at the moment, I immediately said, "No." And I realized the reason I was annoyed by someone asking if I was off-task.....was because I was off-task, and I probably was going to procrastinate.

Not sure if I'm explaining this well, but um, yeah!

 

Just know that I truly relate to these feelings, and it's OK. I think the less you dwell on it the better you'll feel. And maybe making changess to the way you work....in big and/or little ways. Sometimes the little things can really help. 

submitted by Owlgirl
(April 17, 2017 - 6:10 pm)