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How to be
How to be a Mary Sue in just ten days!
1. Remember to have long, shiny, silky hair, that you either let down or wear in braids.
2. Preferably, it is neon green or something like that. If you can't go for that, then at least golden-blond or raven-black or as red as a ripe carrot.
3. Of course, it should come from magic or you should just be born that way. Dye is unacceptable.
4. Your eyes must be green or purple. See number three.
5. You must have an extremely unusual name and a least four middle names.
6. Any teachers who show favoritism toward your enemy are the Evil Overlord.
7. Of course, any teachers that show favoritism toward you are the Wise Old Mentor.
To be continued... By you!
submitted by Tiffany W.
(July 10, 2012 - 1:38 pm)
(July 10, 2012 - 1:38 pm)
Umm...what is a Mary Sue?
Spammy says cbew. CB ew?
A Mary Sue is a female character who is perfect in every way, too perfect.
Admin
(July 10, 2012 - 6:29 pm)
Top!
(July 10, 2012 - 6:30 pm)
A character that is unusual, flawless, often described in purple prose and with a tragic background, and loved by everyone in the story except for the villain and complete idiots.
(July 11, 2012 - 8:41 am)
8. Describe all your clothes in lavish, excessive detail.
9. Develop unusual powers at an alarming rate—one a month or so is best, more quickly if you can manage it.
10. You are always right. Anyone who says otherwise is clearly villainous or severely brain-damaged. React accordingly to any criticism you might receive or perceive.
11. Shoehorn in on everybody else's glory. If Secondary Character #3 makes a spectacular speech that results in a standing ovation, you must immediately make a speech that gets you an even better reaction.
12. Warp the story so that everybody's lives revolves around you. If the other characters do not spend every waking moment wondering about your well-being or pandering to your every whim, you are doing something wrong.
13. As an addendum to #4, your eyes can be any color (see: Bella Swan), but they must either change color or flash noticeably when you become emotional, or simply be remarked upon as often as possible without a plot-relevant reason for this to be so (i.e., Harry Potter does not meet this criteria because his eyes are remarked upon because they remind people of his mother, not because they are OMG so pretty).
14. You should seriously consider getting some form of cute animal familiar. Bonus points will be given if you are the only character in the story to do this.
15. Always be full of self-righteous pride and moral superiority. Your actions are always good and right, regardless of how similar they might be to the Evil Side. (I AM LOOKING AT YOU, ROSE POTTER.)
(July 11, 2012 - 11:00 am)
Any brave, daring, skillful huntress with a mysterious past and royal lineage who just happens to come upon the Fellowship and joins them, with a noble purpose of assisting the Quest and then attaches herself to some hapless male character (Aragorn or Legolas, usually)! Urgh!
Soory, I've been reading too much Lord of the Rings fanfic lately. Arnuriel, Araraniel, Jeren, Alunim, and Cassaranda are coming dangerously close to turning me completely insan...Don't ask. Or see for yourself- just go to the LotR fanfiction archive at fanfiction.net.
(July 11, 2012 - 1:28 pm)
Rose Potter?
17. You must have more than one love interest at the same time, which you spend about a book wondering what to do about. If you can not get more than one, he must be immortal, supernatural, etc. and you must have difficulties because of that. Bonus points if you have two love interests one or both of which is immortal and supernatural (coughcoughcough)
17. You must faint much more often than anyone else in the book, and still be considered a tough heroine that can do everything herself.
18. You must be described as 'loner' or 'never smiling' and still get amazing surges of emotion every other chapter.
19. If you are very short tempered, prove that by only getting angry at the Evil Overlord who killed your parents and gave you a horrible life.
(July 11, 2012 - 3:33 pm)
Rose Potter... super!ninja!druid!wandless-magic!metamorphagus!Dementor-killing!Occlumency-Master!Snape-buddy!Animagus!Teleporting!Time-Turner-abusing!self-righteous!casts-Unforgivables-with-lurve!smarter-than-Hermione!calls-McGonnagal-Minnie!carves-words-onto-Ron's-forehead!Cedric-dating!crazier-than-canon-Bellatrix-but-infinitely-less-awesome!female!Harry Potter, alias Tom Riddle Jr. Jr. Half of her story is DIRECTLY QUOTED from the Harry Potter books with nothing but pronouns changed. The rest... is... just... don't look it up. Really, don't.
(July 11, 2012 - 7:14 pm)
0_o Oh my gosh? Seriously? Who wrote this? A third grader? Whoever it is needs to type 'Mary Sue' into a search engine.
(July 12, 2012 - 7:03 pm)
20. You must be flawless.
21. You must not have fear, except for the huge things, like the Evil Overlord hunting you down For that, you are permitted to quake in your boots.
22. You must have a small scar that is all that is left over from your skirmish with the Evil Overlord. However, it must not make you ugly. It must enhance your cuteness.
(July 11, 2012 - 7:45 pm)
So, all things considered, the perfect Mary Sue is
Drum roll
Bella Swan.
I hate Twilight.
No offense to all you Twilight lovers
But remember love backwards is evol. XD
(July 14, 2012 - 12:44 am)
Ooooh, this is bad. I just read a friend's story and told them their character was a Mary Sue (was that insulting?). The character followed rules 2,3,4,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,14,15,17a,17b,19, and 21.
(July 15, 2012 - 4:31 pm)
23. You must win at EVERYTHING. Everything must go perfect; all the odds must be ever in your favor. If you don't win or succeed, the game/event/quest is obviously rigged and you must go find the person who "tricked" you.
24. You are not allowed to speak the word "failure." It's pretty useless if you're not allowed to fail. (See rule #23.) And for that matter, the words "lose" and "tragedy" are banned too.
25. Always go around spouting kind, sweet words of wisdom whenever people need it. Use this especially on your enemies, because they will be so shocked that somebody is saying nice things to them, coming from a long and storied past, that they will be sure to give in!
(July 21, 2012 - 8:45 am)
To the top with this amazing thread!
(July 22, 2012 - 7:31 am)
Oh no, I think I did a double TOP....
(July 22, 2012 - 7:32 am)
26. You must have the ability to make people soften/mellow during the duration of your story.
27. Following rule #25 you must have it in your power to forgive/see your enemies in a good light and (this is optional) recruit them to the good side.
(July 26, 2012 - 11:30 am)