In Which I

Chatterbox: Inkwell

In Which I

In Which I Realise That I've Never Shared Any Of My Original Fiction With You, And I Desperately Need Feedback On This Short Story, Even Though It's Incomplete

***

“I have come,” said the boy, “to talk to the witch.”

“Have you?” said the old woman. “And what would you say if the witch told you she had no time for little boys?” 

“Then I would tell her that she was a fool,” said the boy. He sounded far less certain. 

The woman laughed. It was not a cackle; it was far more pleasant — nearly friendly. “And what if she put a curse on you for your impudence?” 

“I don’t think she would do that.” 

“Going to risk it?”

“No.” 

“No, you ain't.” She sounded vaguely disappointed. “What’s your name, boy?” 

“Mort,” he said. 

“Short for Mortimer?” 

“No. For Mortality.” 

“Is that so. Well, we’re all going to die eventually,” she said. “Even the old witch. Sit down, boy.” 

He did, looking discomfited. 

“Now, why have you come to seek my advice, Mortality?” 

“I want to learn about magic,” he said.

“Ah? Why’s that, then? Want to be a wizard?” 

“No. I don’t like wizards. I just want to be able to protect myself, that’s all.” 

“And you need magic to protect yourself? Who’s attacking you that you can’t defend yourself against with a sword?” 

“Er. Chaos. I think.” 

“D’you mean just chaos, or the personification of the idea of chaos, or is that just your older sister’s name?” 

“Yes. That is, my older sister is the personification of the idea of chaos.” 

A moment’s pause. “Do you mean to say that you’re the personification of the idea of mortality?” 

“More or less, yeah. I mean, it‘s a bit more complicated than that, but that’s the gist of it. Does it, er, bother you? It does some people.” 

She gave him a long look. “Awful short, ain’t you?” 

“I thought you would be a bit more surprised than that.”

“I’m a witch. It’s hard to surprise witches. You’re an anthropo-thingummy, though. Don’t you have powers of your own?”

He made a face. “Chaos is older than I, and more powerful. I could fight a human, but not her. Erm. I only have real power against mortals. Immortals aren’t really my jurisdiction, as it were.” 

“Of course.” She tapped a finger on the table. “I don’t know that my magic is enough to fight off Chaos, dearie.”

***

Thoughts? (And, er, title suggestions?)

submitted by ZNZ
(March 22, 2012 - 4:55 pm)

Awesome! And, no, no title suggestions. That's my problem-- I can never come up with good titles. 

submitted by Tiffany W.
(March 22, 2012 - 5:42 pm)

TOP! That goes for this thread too. 

submitted by Tiffany W.
(March 23, 2012 - 12:18 pm)

TOP! That goes for this thread too. 

submitted by Tiffany W.
(March 23, 2012 - 12:18 pm)

Ooooohhhhh, I like it. Continue on, I will keep reading. Sorry I have no title sugestions, I'm terrible at titles.

submitted by Hawk, age 14, Christophsis
(March 23, 2012 - 4:15 pm)

Really like it :D Though I like the boy's explanations, it might be more convincing if he sounds like a confused little boy. Do you think this would work as a play?

submitted by Amy G.
(March 25, 2012 - 2:02 pm)

This sounds kind of cool! You could call it Mortality's Request if you wanted.

submitted by PiperC., age 12, Atlantis
(April 14, 2012 - 5:23 pm)