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Hitchhiker's Guide to
Chatterbox: Inkwell
Hitchhiker's Guide to
Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy, Third Edition
Ford is trapped in a dungeon, and he needs your help to research the known galaxy for the third edition of the Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy, otherwise he'll be fired from his job.....he would also be very pleased if you could work on getting him out of jail, too. The reasons why he was put in there in the first place we are unfortunately not allowed to disclose to the human race, but here are the few words that we can tell you: "cold tea", "jail", "Supreme Galactic Counsel", "Earth", "fairy cake", and "bad poetry". In fact, these are the only words we know on the subject ourselves, so there's no use pestering us for more information.
CaptainRead and John F.Q will post the story from Ford's point of view, and this will work as an RP, so please post a character, their appearance, backstory, species, etc., and any of their ideas for helping to get Ford out of jail. Eventually, we should decide on an idea, act on it, and then the Great Jail-Break shall begin!
By the way, you should, in every other post or so, include at the bottom some piece of random, made-up-by-you information for Ford to send to the HHGTTG. If there are not enough (at least 8 for now) tidbits of information by the time this thread reaches 15 posts, Ford gets fired, and the rescue mission fails because there is not enough motivation on Ford's part. Once this thread gets more than 15 posts, a new level of "enough info" will be set by CaptainRead or John F.Q.
We hope this is enough info for you; if anything confuses you, go drink some tea, and then ask us, and we will consult Eddie and possibly tell you the answer...
P.S. We don't know how many people on here have read/listened to these books/radio series, so there is every possibility that this will flop, but don't forget, we have an Infinite Improbability Drive on our side!
submitted by John F.Q.& Cptn.Reed, age undecided, TheHeartOfGold
(March 9, 2014 - 7:46 pm)
(March 9, 2014 - 7:46 pm)
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(September 21, 2015 - 7:25 am)
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(September 21, 2015 - 7:29 am)
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(September 21, 2015 - 7:35 am)
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(September 21, 2015 - 1:11 pm)
Joining
*coughcoughcoughplzupdateacertainskilodgeiknowandlovecoughahckcough*
(September 21, 2015 - 5:32 pm)
Do you have a cold? I do hope it's not contagious!
Yes, it is I, The Ominous. Don't panic, I am still alive. (oops, Hitchhiker's Guide reference not intended. But we'll go with it.) I must admit that the RMS Tiny (which is not a ski lodge, it is merely a tribute to the ski lodges. I'm hoping that you're talking to me though... it would be awkward if you meant a different ski lodge spin-off... But I'm guessing that mine is the only one that hasn't been updated in a long time...) anyways, I'm sorry that you have to put up with my inability to post days regularly... I know I've said it before and it's probably not very convincing by now, but day 10 is on it's way!
P.S. If you really are talking to me, thank you for reminding me that someone still likes reading the RMS Tiny even with me being so bad at updating on time. I was beginning to wonder if you'd all disappeared to more interesting stories...
(September 23, 2015 - 6:50 pm)
*GAAAAP*
*embarrassing fangirl scream*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Forgive me if I mess something up, I've only read the first book and was not aware of the sequels until recently :P
Kyra
Age: ...
Race: Robot
Backstory: An "impatient" GPP. Made by a bunch of mindless jerks who'll be first against the wall when the revolution comes.
Personality: Pushy, impatient, and a little rebellious. Obviously computer smart (IS A ROBOT?) Taps her foot often. Wants to know the Question.
Appearance: Metal... :| round eyes which specially have the shine thing.
______
The Moradan Wolverine is a large, fuzzy creature which constantly wants to give out free hugs, though often failing in keeping the hugee alive due to its gigantic claws. It is always very depressed when this mishap happens.
(September 21, 2015 - 5:40 pm)
@Indigo: Awesome! I don't remember if we wrote a character form, so just go with the usual stuff.
@Somebody: Cool character! And I like the "fact", it's random and funny, like most (or all) of the Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy!
Well, I didn't really expect anyone to want to join this 'cause it's so old and I didn't know if any current CBers even knew about HHGTTG, but this is awesome! Do you guys want to go with our original starting scene of being on Larry the mattress and his super-intelligent shade of maroon with a bag of things starting with T, or something else? I have a feeling that this didn't work out the first time because we were too strict about what would happen, so we can start whenever/wherever you want. I have a feeling that we didn't make the quota of "facts" due to all the toppers, so we can just restart from the top of this page of comments, I guess?
Captcha says hhgi! So close to HHGTTG, Captcha! So close, and yet so far...
(September 23, 2015 - 7:14 pm)
AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY CHARACTER NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
type: babel fish.
Weakness: The only thing you can bribe him with is..... DENTAL FLOSS. (No one knows what he does with it, for babel fish don't have teeth.) And can only speak..... he's very embarrassed about this mind you...... 97 languages
Strange thing he can/can't do: he floats around in air. (He DOES need oxygen, but not a lot of it.)And he can't talk or understand 1,000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 languages. (The usual babel fish can speak.) Why? He didn't do his homework often enough. ;) And he can pick locks. he picks locks horribly, but he can still do it. Strange, because he's only got flippers.
Appearance: Orange. Scaly. Cool sunglasses.
Personality: Makes jokes alot. Likes puns. Hates poetry. Likes to be heroic. sometimes awkward. Really, really, hates water. And loves earth.(He loves earth because they humans make wonderful pizza.)
Home planet: Why would I tell YOU?
Hope you liked that!!!!!!!!!
(September 23, 2015 - 7:21 pm)
Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..................... I kind of forgot about the planet.... hehehe.. sorry about that. yes.... OHHHHHH............ I totally forgot about the HITCHICKER'S GIUDE TO THE GALAXY IDEA: A race of living suitcases. Now, the reason this race came into being was purely because many people got tired of carrying their luggage, so they created a race of living suitcases, unfortunately, the suitcases escaped the testing area, so they are not the slaves of all of humanity. Also, after escaping the testing area, they developed a sort of languge, (As in they waved their tags a lot and made munching noises.) and were free to do what they wanted. But they were unhappy, the reason, being that they couldn't fufill their duty, to carry luggage, so they were empty inside.(Both lituraly and figuratively.)
And that is why if you meet a talking suitcase, they seem so deeply depressed. now, long after the great escape, one suitcase decided it had had enough, so "he" said: "I'm tired of barely understanding eachother, in fact, I'm so tired of it that I'm going to organize some suitcases to help me find a languge we can use!" Or: "Munch, munch, wave, wave, munch, gurgle!" So they studied all the other languges, and settled on this one: the languge of the humans. And so they lived, relatively happily. So, this story shows axactly what tired people can do.
THE END.
Did you like that idea? I loved it.
(September 29, 2015 - 3:19 pm)
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(September 30, 2015 - 4:54 pm)
LET THIS THREAD BE READ!!!!!!! TOP!
(November 14, 2015 - 11:20 am)
Common-Sense Rules for Visiting a Nightclub on the Planet Djegdynif
1. Never mention the word "broccoli." And I mean never.
2. If you decide to ignore rule #1, have your gloopshooter handy.
3. On second thought, have your gloopshooter handy all the time.
4. When talking about the economy, the Antiprime Minister, or interstellar porcupines, talk about them in a derogatory fashion.
5. Gamble only what you're willing to see covered in engine coolant and little bits of paper.
6. If you order any drink, be prepared to have it taste like radioactive Tang.
7. If the song "Dibbwek las Fiwwgex" comes on, make yourself as flat as possible against a wall in order to avoid getting crushed.
8. If you're a guy, flirt.
9. If you're a girl, don't.
10. If you're something else, scrap these rules and go to a nightclub on a different planet.
Koda says rgvo. Oh, yes, Koda, I almost forgot! Rule number 11: Those who attack Rugovans have a 73.294% statistical likelihood of waking up hanging by one leg (or other appendage) in a tree, wondering how the blazes they got there. You have been warned.
(December 12, 2015 - 7:51 am)
OFFICIAL NOTICE FROM THE GOVERNMENT OF THE EMGIAN SUB-CONFEDERACY OF PLANETS AND FLOATING CHEESE
The following new legislation enacted Thursday: The H-25794-NT Pastaplasmic Afulgerator Type II Supralight Engine (henceforth referred to as "the Product"), sold by FranGopp Spatial Amylotechnics Inc., is now a prohibited item in the Sub-Confederacy. It is hereby unlawful to buy, sell, manufacture, or maintain the Product on any planet or floating cheese of the Sub-Confederacy, nor is it lawful to ship the Product onto or off of any said planet (or cheese). No mechanic may install the Product on any vessel, nor may they service a Product already in place; they must instead remove the Product and speak to the owner of the vessel about suitable replacements. Any Product in stores or removed from a vessel in this way must be brought to the government. Violation is punishable by fines, possible jail time, and prolonged tickling.
The reason for this legislature is a breakthrough study on the Product performed by two and a half top scientists at the University of Jgsqmfm, which conclusively proves that the Product gives off "bad vibes" as a side effect of its unique method for attaining supralight speeds, and ties its escalating use to the recent (albeit slight) decline in the pink-spotted volcanic-wasteland penguin population on two Sub-Confederacy planets.
In other news, my captcha Koda says roby. Yes, I know the new intern at the broadcasting station is named Roby. Why do you feel the need to tell me that?
(December 13, 2015 - 6:35 pm)
Name: Levé
Species: Small Furry Creature From Alpha Centauri (HHGTTG reference here)
Apperance: Its skin is the black leather of motorcycle jackets, its fur is fluffy pomeranian white. Its eyes are black. It has very short limbs.
Backstory: Ran away from home when zie was young,because it was in love with a petticoat that it wasn't allowed to marry.
Personality: Tough, Rough, impatient, wine-lover, secretly self-doubting.
Planet of origin: Latex 91, where everything is made of high power office supplies
Important information: It rides a motorcycle
Rest later
(December 13, 2015 - 7:52 pm)