Because we're halfway done, here's an updated list of who is alive for you convenience (read: I can't remember who's alive and who isn't anymore). And someday I will be able to spell convenience without using the spell check. But it is not this day! This day, I misspell! By all that I hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you stand, Spellcheck of the West!

Blackberry E.

Skyler

Melody

Blonde Heroines Rule

Red

SC

Gilraen E.

Maggie

Lizzy 

Tovah L.

Grace R. 

I actually play the piano, so I'm glad I didn't die today. I would get murdered by my own instrument. *goes off sneaking glances at the piano and shuddering*

I'm sorry I wasn't able to write this ahead of time. I'm really trying to be better about this!

Day 15 a.k.a. Bad Wednesday

The clocks in the ski lodge did so love it when the lodge had company. A rather large party had come up this time, but the ranks were thinning out nicely. The particular clock where today's story started happened to be a simple wall clock in a bedroom. It was one of the luckier ones, in that two occupents were still living in it. Currently, both were asleep, but as it ticked quietly passed seven o' clock, one girl began to stir. She sat up in her bed and stretched a bit before settling down under the blankets to sleep again when...

Maggie: Time to get up!

Lizzy: I don't want to get up! Why do I always have to get up first?

Maggie: You're the eldest and you said you would make breakfast with Skyler and me--that's why.

Lizzy: But I don't want to be the eldest. Why can't SC be the eldest sometimes?

Maggie: Because you were born first--see?

Lizzy: Well, I didn't ask to be. I'm tired of being born first. I wanted to sleep.

Maggie: You can sleep tonight after you go to bed.

Lizzy: But I want to sleep now!

Maggie: Well, nobody wants to sleep all the time!

Lizzy: I do!

A little-known fact is that Maggie is actually incredibly strong and is entirely capable of dragging a seventeen year old out of bed and into the kitchen.

Skyler: *yawning* Good morning. Did you guys sleep well? 

Lizzy: No.

Skyler: Oh, we were going to have Rice Krispies, weren't we? There's only enough for ten. Lizzy, you'll have to have oatmeal.

Lizzy: But why? I want Rice Krispies.

Skyler: Because you're the eldest!

During breakfast...

Grace: What's today?

Blackberry: Wednesday, isn't it?

Grace: Then it's today we're going to have tea with the assassins!

Red: Wednesday! Wednesday's child is full of woe--that's Lizzy. Ow! Hey, don't kick me! Monday's child is fair of face--well, I was born on a Monday. That explains a lot. (I don't have the slightest clue when Red was born or even how to decide when that was, so I'm using his birthday in 1999. It was a Monday.) 

Gilraen: Oh, really.

Red: I am. I heard the narrator say I'm as handsome as the boot brush. 

Gilraen: The boot brush?

Red: It does the boots and shoes. 

Lizzy: Well, that's not very handsome. Besides, your eyes are all weird. Yes, and you walk funny, like you're constantly skipping.

I'll leave you to imagine how this scene ended. Later, the clock in the lounge was able to witness a somewhat remarkable scene...

Grace: Hey, Lizzy, won't you play Twister with Tovah and me?

Lizzy: No, I won't. I want to be by myself and paint depressing pictures of my lost childhood innocence. And unicorns. These may be one and the same thing.

Grace: ... What?

BHR: Oh, hey! Have you guys seen where JLM is? She said she'd ice the cake in the fridge, but we all just decided we'd like it plain. 

Lizzy: She's in the laundry room.

BHR: Thanks! Could you go tell her? I'm too tired out from skiing to do anything but flop in this chair. *flop*

Lizzy: Must I? Why can't SC?

BHR: But I didn't think you liked helping! And SC isn't even here at the lodge, she's skiing. Besides, you're the eldest. Can't you do it?

Lizzy went and told JLM as slowly as possible. But when JLM suggested that perhaps Lizzy could run and tell Melody to do the vacuuming, Lizzy left quite another mess on the carpet. If she was the eldest, like everyone reminded her, she might as well get a chance to vent some feelings in a healthy, adult-ish manner. She delivered the message all the same and told Melody that her singing was horrid, which Lizzy didn't actually think. Melody crossly told her that it was for Blue Fairy, and Melody wouldn't sing a thing for Lizzy if she died.

Lizzy: I wish I was the only one here.

Tovah: Doesn't that mean you'd have to murder all of us first? Whoops, sorry, Grace! Why don't you run away? You're probably old enough to live alone, legally.

Lizzy: But you'd miss me!

Tovah: No, I wouldn't. I barely know you, and I won't miss you if you're always going to be cross. Besides, then I could have your paint box.

Lizzy: No you couldn't. I'd take it with me.

And thus she began to paint the lost innocence of her childhood while generally ignoring the crashes and cries of "I think that was my spleen you landed on!" and the snoring coming from the chair, whose occupant apparently could do more than just flop. Eventually, Grace and Tovah came over to watch the painting.

Grace: Why don't you put another pink unicorn right there?

And in pointing, she accidentally knocked over a pot of water on the picture.

Lizzy: Oh, I can't bear it. You great Clumsy! You've spoilt everything! 

BHR woke up just in time to see something that would explain why employers later asked Lizzy, "So can you explain this charge of child abuse on your record?" Don't worry, no one was seriously injured, although Grace may have fallen over onto Tovah's spleen. The judicial panel (a.k.a. Blackberry and SC (who won rock paper scissors) decided she would miss out on tea with the assassins and be confined to her room for the remainder of the day.

Lizzy: I don't want to go. I'd rather stay here.

Another ski lodger claimed they had a headache and wouldn't want to have tea either. Thanks to that bad ol' plot device, no one could remember who that was and thus was unable to figure out which ski lodger dressed up in old fashioned clothing, kidnapped Lizzy, and clocked her over the head with an antique bowl in the middle of the woods. Remember, kids, if you don't be good or get along with your friends, one of them will take you out with old crockery, so always be safe by bribing all your friends with cookies and sleep with the money under your mattress and a cupcake under your pillow.

Rest in peace, Lizzy. Rest in peace. 

I'm really sorry the last two days have been really hectic for me.  Whichever the next one you write is, the song can be "Poor Unfortunate Souls" because I don't think I've used a Little Mermaid song yet.

Day 16

Glitter is my enemy. It laughs evilly in its jar as I go by. It taunts me, saying, "Look, Narrator, just look at me! I may be sealed away for now, but soon, my friends, soon. I will be everywhere!" And then some girl (usually my mother) has the brilliant idea that, really, everything is much much better with glitter and therefore they must spread it around as much as possible so it goes everywhere and then there is glitter on the ceiling and glitter on the walls and glitter on the cat. This is especially talented if the glitter is used at school and it still somehow gets on the cat. The glitter laughs at me, "My abilities to get everywhere and be shiny and annoying are perfect! I will take over the world! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!" Glitter is one of the most malevolent objects on this planet, right up there with attack pandas and that kid you hate who sits in front of you in science and you swear his mission in life is to make you look bad. There was a point to all this, but I seem to have forgotten it. ... Oh, wait, I remember! Ski lodge! Right! That! Alas, tragically, our malevolent friend Mr. Glitter took out our dear friend Blackberry today. Her elf-powers could not save her and she drowned in an enormous pot of glitter (probably that same pot that Ivy drowned in). The murderer supposedly has contacts with the glitter factory. 

Gilraen: With all this glitter, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Grace: Glitter party?

Gilraen: Glitter fight! Like snowball fight, but less cold!

Tovah: I vote that the oldest has to clean it up!

SC: YOU @#%&^ BRATS!

Lizzy's ghost: Ha! Revenge!

All that glitter. Ugh. I'm going to go hide and pretend this never happened.

SC: I think I'll join you on that.

Maggie: Oh, no you don't. Here's your broom, here's your mess, good luck.

Red: I feel your pain, SC.

SC: Would you mind helping, then?

Red: You really shouldn't try to poison people if you'll want their help later on. Have fun!

I don't know about you, but I know SC was feeling pretty murderous to some of you kids later.

Skyler: Do you think SC was kidding when she yelled, "I'll get you Skyler, and your little dog too!" after BHR and I dumped a bucket of glitter on her head?

Melody: You poor unfortunate souls, perhaps I could help.

BHR: Help? How? Could you get her not to call me a dog?

Meldoy: My dear sweet child. That's what I do. It's what I live for.

BHR: I thought you lived to sing Disney songs.

Melody: To help unfortunate children like yourselves. Poor souls with no one else to turn to. I admit that in the past I've been nasty. They weren't kidding when they called me a, well, witch.

Red: *snorts*

Melody: Shut it, you! But you'll find that nowadays I've mended all my ways. Repented, seen the light, and made a switch to this. And I fortunatly know a little magic, it's a talent that I always have possessed. And dear lady, or sir in this case, please don't laugh. I use it on behalf of the miserable, the lonely, and depressed. 

Grace: I always thought you just sang because you liked the sound of your own voice.

Melody: Poor unfortuante souls! In pain, in need. This one longs to be thinner, that one wants to get the girl.

Skyler: What girl?

Red: ... No comment.

BHR: Ohhhh, I see, you've got a crush on someone. Who is it? Who is it? You can tell Aunty BHR, she'll keep your secret safe. If by safe you mean that half the world sees it, then yes, it's very safe.

Red: Say, Melody, a little more of that song, please?

Melody: And do I help them? Yes, indeed. These poor unfortunate souls, so sad, so true. They come flocking to my Embiff, crying "Songs, Melody, please!". And I help them! Yes I do. Now it's happened once or twice, someone couldn't pay the price, and I'm afriad I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals. Yes, I've had the odd complaint, but on the whole I've been a saint to those poor unfortuante souls. Now, I can get SC off your tails for a little price.

Maggie: And that is?

Melody: You need to stab JLM and-

BHR: I'll do it!

Gilraen: Yeesh, knocked over her chair? Is she really that excited to stab someone?

Melody: And the one of you with the best voice will have to give me your voice.

Grace: Trying to get rid of the competition, aren't you?

Melody: Rats! I hoped they wouldn't see through my plot!

Rest in peace, Blackberry. Rest in peace.