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That poem was really good, I like the way you describe things, with your poem it is as if you have captured a moment of time otherwise unsignificant and made it into a beautiful reality, good job!
I would also like to ask if I may join. I write free verse mainly but also the occasional haiku when the mood strikes me.
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Thank you so much Juniper!!
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Welcome Squeak and Juniper! I hope I spelled your names correctly. I was reading my poem, and I noticed how it was a little confusing when talking about the paper. Here is what I was trying to describe: I had a stack of paper and folded it in half without creasing it, and it kind of fanned open when I lay it on the table. Any ideas how I could make it less confusing? Any ideas for the title??? Also I wondered if there is anyone here who thinks this my be have juxtaposition in it? I thought there might be a little bit. If you do not know what juxtaposition is, I make a horrible dictionary even if I know the definitions.
When we finish discussing poems, than other people will post their poems in the order that they joined.
I'm so happy so many talented writers are joining! Yay!
Does anyone have any questions?
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Hi Rose bud ,
I would love to share poetry with you all . I like to write deep poetry that makes you think a lot about it after you read it . Also , I love just writing regular and poetic fantasy. I'm about to be published for the first time in poetry , but have been published multiple times for writing .
Thanks ,
Emma Rose ( Cloudy )
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Yay! Emma Rose!!
My cousin just joined the Chatterbox tonight too. I'm pretty sure it is her, her pen name is Queen Elizabeth. See you tomorrow!
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Poem; The Dream of Drowning Treasure: By Winter Firefly
The Dream of Drowning Treasure:I gasp for a breath,
I can not breathe,
Water, water surrounding me,
I breath it in, I can not stop,
I feel it going into my, lungs, limbs,
My heart feels ready to pop,
I see the fins
Of the shark,
I'm drowning, drowning,
Everything goes dark,
My heart is frowning upon the deep blue nothingness,
I see the Treasure sitting there,
I sink in awe and airlessness,I dearly want air,
I see my life before my eyes,
Rushing, rushing, rushing by,
I hear the cries,
I can't believe I hear my cry,
Sinking, sinking to the depth,Growing darker darker, all the time,I cant wait for the aftermath,I hear the chime,Lying in my bed,I open my eyes,I saw my life ahead,Then I realize,It was a dream!—It's been through a lot of editing -
Wow! I love it Winter Firefly! I saw this at the poem post by Indigo, and it has come a long way since then! I commented on it, but I was using my real name.
If you like, I can take it through my edititng process, which takes a little while. Or I could study it and give a quick poem analysis from a reader's (me) view. Or I could do neither. Is there anything you are stuck on in this poem and would like a few ideas?
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Winter Firefly, if you would like me to critique your poem, we will be gone this weekend, and I will not be able to do anything on Saturday or Sunday.
To all: if you sign up for a critique group, expect Critiques, but no negative critiques! I can take your poem through my editing process, if you would like. You are welcome to post questions, comments, ideas, similes, metaphors, bits of personification, and even quotes from yourself or other poets!
Any questions?
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Top the posts when the go do-own! top top top Top top, top top top top.
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I would love some critique! That's why I joined this!
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Awesome! I will probably have them by Wednesday. I would have them sooner, but I will be gone this Weekend.