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Ways To Annoy
Ways To Annoy Lord Voldemort (Hah, Voldemort's in the world around me ... )
Because I saw it somewhere. And it looked like fun. Here is my original list. Feel free to add.
1. Call him Voldy.
2. Call him Tom. Or, if you're feeling really brave, Tommy.
3. Call him Mr. Riddle.
4. Say, "You know, I really do think it's about time you and Bella got together.
5. Say, "It's not nice to hurt people. It's mean. And we don't want to be mean, do we? Of course not."
6. Point your finger at him and say, in a sing-song voice, "Moldy old Voldy! Look at Moldy Voldy!" Fall down laughing.
7. Say, "You know, this whole 'I must kill Harry Potter' thing is getting really old."
8. Give him a birthday present. Like a teddy bear. Or a dollhouse.
9. Give him a Valentine ...
10. ... and misspell his name on it.
11. Mispronounce his name. ("Voll -- Voll-dee --" "Voldemort." "Mind if I just call you Bob?")
12. Say, "You're a big fat meanie!"
13. Tell him you think he's cute.
14. Pet Nagini. (Or at least try to.)
15. Tell Nagini, "Oh, oo's a good wittle snakey wakey, yes oo is!"
16. If you're with another witch or wizard, casually turn to them while Voldemort's talking and say, "So, as I was saying earlier ...." Have a completely unrelated conversation.
submitted by ZNZ, age Ageless, That's for me t
(April 14, 2010 - 7:50 pm)
(April 14, 2010 - 7:50 pm)
But it would annoy him nonetheless, wouldn't it? And it isn't as if any of us would actually do any of this. That would be suicide.
(April 18, 2010 - 12:34 pm)
Along the same lines as #4: Lean over confidentially and whisper, "Bella asked me to tell you that she likes you. Like, she like likes you." Giggle.
(April 17, 2010 - 6:41 pm)
Put on a Cloak of Invisibility so he doesn't see you, and say: "This is your consience speaking, you stink, Harry rocks, and you owe him an apology." Then throw the cloak off and say,"I think your consience is right. Let's go." Hold his hand as tight as possible and tell the other bad guys what you're doing.
(April 18, 2010 - 8:18 am)
Hey I have some:
1. Tell him "Harry Potter is better than him at wizard chess, dueling, potion making, being awesome, getting girls, can wear a cape SO much better, (goes on and on and on in a list of random things)"
2. Tell him "Your'e gonna die alone!"
3. Tell him "Killing is SO last year!"
4. Tell him "You need an acting coach."
5. Ask him "Why do you like killing people? It makes nobody want to be with you. Well, even if you were the good guy, I would stay away. You really need to take a bath." Wave your hand in front of your nose and walk away.
6. On Halloween, have him ask you what he should be and say, "I think that you would be AWESOME! for Luna Lovegood. It would really bring out your eyes."
7. When he invites you to his house, ask him for a drink, try some of it, and spit it in his face, say, "This is the more gross than pig bladder!"
8. Take him ice skating, then leave him there when you go home.
9. Learn what he's allergic to, and then stuff whatever it is in his face.
10. Tell him he that he will have a terrible future.
11. Tell him that he's uglier than a stonefish.
(April 18, 2010 - 1:32 pm)
TOP!
(April 18, 2010 - 2:55 pm)
Heehee, you're crazy!!!! But, I'm currently rereading them, so I know how you feel.... :)
(April 19, 2010 - 3:13 am)
Hmm... ZNZ is right. What if he's reading it!
Ooh, I know!
We'll disguise the list!
Stay tuned..........
(April 20, 2010 - 2:13 pm)
Oh this sounds like fun!
1: Play hide-and-go-seek.
2: Say, "Oh no! you are ugly! Quick, get into the Plastic Surgery room!" Usher him into another room, give him a bloody nose by slamming his face into the wall. Then put a flowery/polka-dotted pink wig on him that spells, "I LOVE MY LITTLE PONIES!" and then take him back and say, "Terrific!" Of course that would be suicide.
3: Knock a cronie out, dress up as him, find out what he's planning, dress up as Harry, telL him (Voldy) what you heard. (Then go report to Harry!)
Vick says vyem.
~~NDT~~
(April 20, 2010 - 7:45 pm)
So here's where we left off.... we need to disgiuse the page so he won't know what we are plotting like ZNZ said. Here's the plan... *whispers*
OK!
Dear Mr. Voldemort, Sir,
I'm sorry we did a thread called "Ways to Annoy Voldemort." We meant to put "Harry Potter."
Sincerely,
CJ
That should do it!
(April 21, 2010 - 6:07 am)
I have a few more!
You know how he starts to hurt when he touches Harry? Next time say, "You really should work out more."
Steal his wand. Wave it around and yell, "Abra Kadabra!" then accidently break it. "Whoa! That was almost as weak and brittle as you!"
When he is dueling, sing "Ohwoahoh, it's magic! or Strange Magic! or Do you belive in magic?"
When he is angry, say "You should look on the bright side! At least you don't have to worry about washing your hair!"
(April 21, 2010 - 3:29 pm)
* give him scented candles for every holiday. this includes Earth day, hug day, squirrel apreciation day, harry potter's birthday, etc.
* celebrate harry potter's birthday with a big birthday bash and have the deatheaters do the limbo
* name your owl Voldemort. Talk to it.
*play would you rather with him. Woud you rather have snape hair or go a few more years without plastic surgery? Hard choice hmm, I see. Would you rather kiss Bellatrix or Bella swan? Edward? would you rather have me tell you the secret that harry is your son or that... oops sorry, spilled the beans. James made me promise but- what are you doing, don't raise your wand on me young man Ahhhhh!
* constantly remind him that he is a fictional bad guy in a children's book and thus can't win. Tell him he'll never be as great as his father.
*cut his robes so that they only go up to his knees. Complement his long legs.
*introduce him to youtube, namely Potter Puppet Pals
*put a spell on him so that he sparkles in the sun
(April 23, 2010 - 3:45 pm)
@ Adina. Hehe. Good One!!
- Ask him when he'll ever get a girl.
- Insult his style in black capes.
- 'Accidentaly' trip while holding a melting ice cream cone, and make it fall on his cape.
- Make him watch a "Dora" marathon, leading up to a new special.
- Introduce him to the song Fireflies, because it's so happy he will have to hate it.
- Tell him to start using anti-aging cream.
- Buy him a membership on a My Little Ponies website.
- Remind him that Harry Potter is much more popular than he is.
- Whenever you see him just point and laugh (while ignoring anything he says).
I'll have more, it's a promise!!
(April 23, 2010 - 6:35 pm)
-"Ask him when he'll ever get a girl." Add that Bellatrix would be happy to oblige.
-Run around the Derelict Manor singing songs from the Disney Princess movies.
-Write up a list of "best villains of the year", and put him dead last. Hang it in a conspicuous place in the Derelict Manor.
-While he's sleeping, pour baby powder or flour on a sheet of paper and slip it under the door. Apply a hair dryer.
-Set up paint-filled buckets on every slightly-open door you can find.
-Superglue his fingers together.
-Wander around singing Ear Worms at the top of your lungs. If you are happily immune to these, a good rule of thumb is that written by Stephen Sondheim, Danny Elfman, or Joss Whedon will get stuck for days. Bonus points if they're really sugary like Anything Can Happen from Mary Poppins.
-Attempt to organize a Death Eater kick line a la A Very Potter Musical.
-Tell him that you STILL don't believe he's back.
-Find a pen that writes in neon pink and write his name over and over in curly lettering on any paper you can find. Leave the result for him to find.
-If you have access to a sonic screwdriver, use it to wreak havoc loudly while he's talking. (Me? Excited about the new season? Naw. but Matt Smith is amazing. David Tennant left HUGE shoes to fill, and so far he's doing a darn good job of it)
(April 23, 2010 - 9:48 pm)
Ask for his autograph. If he gives it to you, gasp. Admire and kiss it. Then lose it, and come back for another one. Repeat.
(April 24, 2010 - 8:24 am)
@TNO's While he's sleeping, pour baby powder or flour on a sheet of paper and slip it under the door. Apply a hair dryer.
I think you should have said:
-While he's sleeping, pour baby powder or flour on a sheet of paper and slip it under the door. Apply a hair dryer. Add that he looks better with white robes and face.
And,
-Record you saying, "Muggles are smarter than you are. Stop killing Harry Potter. OR ELSE! Goodbye, Voldydork." Hang loudspeakers saying this repetedly, with top volume. (Bonus Points if you do this at 12:00 am, and double BPs if its right over his bed Triple BPs if its in every bedroom-and quadruple BPs for EVERYWHERE.)
Vick says kdth. Kid tih. Say, "You're kidding!" Interrupt him at the most highest points in his announcements.
~~NDT~~
(June 8, 2010 - 10:20 pm)