Yeah, I totally get what you're saying about trans white people taking nonwhite names after transitioning... and it's like, obviously it's well within their rights and I don't want to tell people what to do, but it still feels kind of icky.

A lot of my complaints about white people and East Asian culture has to do with when people cross the line from 'respecting/admiring someone else's culture' to something more intrusive. Saw a video yesterday about white people using makeup to make themselves look Asian which is soo strange to me. I have a lot of Issues with the K-pop industry as a whole which I won't go into and those aren't the fault of white people but they certainly can be weird about it sometimes. I think Western standards of beauty have a huge impact on Asian culture, especially women. There's a reason why Seoul is the plastic surgery capital of the world- about 1 in 5 Korean women have the double-eyelid surgery to make their eyes look bigger and more 'white'. I know some fully Korean women I know have expressed jealousy because my eyes are naturally bigger due to my white mother. It's all very messed up.

I'm afraid that although my grandma's family lived in Hawaii for a while, they moved back to Korea before she was born so I didn't retain any cultural stuff. A lot of them left to go back to Hawaii after the war started, but she couldn't because she wasn't born there (yeah, they left their 13 year old orphan sister to take care of two younger siblings while escaping North Korea... not great). I went to Hawaii last summer, though, and it was soooo amazing! It's just soo much natural beauty everywhere and I had such a good time. Plus, I fit right in with all the other mixed Asian people there.

I think I might be a she/her gay too?? Honestly it's pretty up in the air rn but I think I'm like if a girl was gay but was also aroace but also was maybe not. It's a little confusing lmao

I'm going to feel silly asking this because I'm sure you've said this before, but what pronouns do you use? You mentioned he/she in this post but any neos I should know about? I'm sorry that you're always with your parents who seem to be into gender roles and not super into being an ally. I'm super lucky to live in an area where pretty much half my school is queer and it's totally normalized to the point where I sometimes forget that it's not like that for some people, which kind of sucks (I just had Thanksgiving dinner with my mom's side of the family and counting me, my bi aunt, the two lesbian couples, and my godfather and his husband I think the queers outnumbered everyone else lol). 

Ok gtg, hope you have a great Thanksgiving guys!! 

Oh my goodness I wrote out this whole long response and then the page refreshed before I could post it while I was figuring out the captcha... (TAT) Imma do my best to rewrite it.

As for the repurposing of other cultures' names, I definitely get how that could come off as cultural appropriation (although the whole concept is something I've struggled with understanding a bit). At the same time I can see how someone could do this without bad intentions (like they just want to sound like/be named after an anime character they admire, or something like that) without realising how that kind of makes it difficult for people of that culture to actually be taken seriously (particularly those who are a mixed/passing white person, or if they are online). I am kind of conflicted on this (especially because as a passing-white I get accused of this sometimes and am like, bro this is my birth name??? I'm sorry I look too white to have this traditionally/culturally significant name that doesn't match me??? (TAT)), but being bothered by it is completely valid too.

About that poem, of course I'm gonna comment -- you're a great poet!!! You clearly have so much to say and I literally love seeing you go off so much! You're literally not any worse than me, I literally just hyperfixate and need to get it out of my system, which is why I write so much lol. I lowkey have a bit of imposter syndrome and have convinced myself that I'm not really that good at poetry but I use so many fancy words and just write so much that people glance at it and assume it's high-quality. Like, a lot of times I look back at things I've written and just cringe, but idk that's a me problem. (>w<)

Finally, regarding that antagonist guy, I completely understand the worries about not having good representation, and to be honest, I'm not completely sure, but I'll try my best to explain why I think it's fine. Basically, it all comes down to complexity -- is his whole personality that he's mixed? In my mind, if that is the case, that would not be "good representation." In the same way that it's ok for villains to be queer-coded or neurodivergent or women or POCs, it is ok to have an under-respresented identity (such as a mixed race individual) being portrayed as in the wrong, as long as it is done tastefully and with respect. It is fine to have his conflicting feelings about being mixed/passing-white feed into his villainy, but they shouldn't be his sole flaw. You know what I mean? Like, it is fine to have a flamboyant and obviously queer character as antagonist, but don't make that the only reason why he* is evil, even if it is related (say he is outed, and people start to say he's morally bankrupt and judge/discriminate against his character unjustly because of this, picking him apart for the little things because of their biases against this part of him, and despite a lifetime of trying so hard to show he's literally just a regular person trying to do good, he eventually feels forced to give in and become the villain they paint him as). The scenario I described makes sense as an alright characterization -- it makes it clear that just because he has this trait doesn't make him an inherently "bad person," they are circumstances that make sense, and that humanizes him, but does not necesarily justify or define him. You could be a black woman and evil, but not because you are a woman or black -- it just so happens that you are part of those marganilised groups, and I feel that that fact should always be made very clear. I would also like to point out that the marginalised identity marker should not be exclusive to the villain. They really shouldn't be the only queer character against all of your cis-heteronormative/"normal" "good guys," for instance (that definitely sends the wrong message... looking at Disney... *ahem*), but token characters are also not great, so you've got to find a balance.

At the same time, I wouldn't necesarily force other characters into a similar identity in order to cater to "good representation" to compensate for a "bad" character. As long as said character are not demonised and stripped of compassion simply for belonging to a marginalised group, there is no need for that anyway. Just because (hypothetically) your "good guy" is a man doesn't mean you are being sexist, necesarily. Sometimes a dude could be right in a situation while a girl is wrong, but make it clear that the opposite is true as well, or show that it is more complex that just "right" and "wrong." It is not that men are inherently more right or wrong, but that in this given situation they are. You can show that even other members of their marginalised group don't agree with the villain, even if they understand where they are coming from (real life examples of this can be seen in African American history, for instance). Show that different characters have different opinions and values and beliefs based on their own experiences -- maybe one character will be like "well why can't you just do this to solve the problem," but another can point out how that really isn't possible or anywhere as easy as it sounds because of (insert reasons) -- character 1 is priviledged, so they didn't even consider that. That doesn't necesarily make them a bad person, being more priviledged, but can be twisted into a flaw if they don't fix their outlook and behaviour. On the other hand, it could result it character growth if they choose to start looking more sypathetically and with understanding rather than judgement or an "I know better than you" attitude (not that that is what they necesarily meant). Also, any stereotypes don't have to be true at all, but if almost everyone (especially those in power) in your world all subscribe to that belief, then be aware that it will have consequences and affect how your characters act and are acted upon. 

Anyway, sorry if that came across as bossy or anything, these are just tips and my own thoughts, of course! 

Am I correct in thinking Silver Crystal's post is still not posted? did something happen? is it still the long holiday weekend?

Yes, we still need to review it. We've been busy. Maybe Wednesday.

Admin

Ty BB!! I can't believe I've been here for three years, wow.

I disagree when you say that you're not as good a poet as me or Jaybells! I think your poems are lovely and you're the only one who can write them like you do. As for my poetry-writing process, I usually get one line/phrase in my head that I really like and craft the rest around it. I think it's really cool that you write rhyming poetry, that seems so much harder than the kind that I'm used to doing. I definintely don't write as much poetry as Jaybells, but it can be pretty fun and I enjoy it a lot (most of the time lol). My main advice for writing poetry is there are no rules and anything goes!

I'm sorry to hear about everything going on with your ADHD and schooling. I know little to nothing about homeschooling and honestly have no idea how it works, but it sounds pretty stressful. My dad and sister both have ADHD so I know a little more about that, and it can really make everyday things much more difficult. Sending love & support <333

It's just amazing how talented some people are at writing- like, how?? My girlfriend sent me a doc with a bunch of her writing today and I was just blown away at how amazing it was. (Now I'm all sad and stuff because I really want to see her but we live in different states and I'm trying to plan a time to see her but we're both so busy and her parents are lowkey homophobic so she hasn't told them about us... idk I just really want to hold her hand and go on dates etc. Makes me feel really not great idk :/) 

Anywaysss I hope your Thanksgivings all went great!! I'm soo not ready to go back to school tomorrow ughhhh 

Oh my goodness this is so painfully relatable... I'm so sorry you have to go through this BB. (TAT) I was homeschooled for a long time but am finishing up in American highschool rn and AHHHHHHH ITS KILLING ME- (If it makes you feel better my friend Jwyn, now a Cornell student, is/was a fellow brilliant homeschooler-until-highschool and neurodivergent potato who stuggled a lot with work like us, and she seems to be doing alright out here. There's still hope! :') ) 

I was recently (officially) diagnosed with ADHD although I've basically always known and finally got a 504 accomodation plan set up but nobody seems to be taking it too seriously... I'm unmedicated for the ADHD and my mum (also has ADHD) says it would most likely help so much but idk because like I literally get panic attacks off of an inhaler so I might react really badly to them. Also, I'm switching meds for the whole depression and anxiety thing so I think they're trying to be careful, especially since I can get really bad really fast and have done kinda dangerous/risky things before and generally struggle immensely with basic facets of life when I start getting weird. I'm pretty sure I'm bipolar (my therapist thinks not, but my famiy also has an EXTENSIVE history with it...) but I'm not sure if it could be just the depression + ADHD working together and being a mess. 

I actually have been having a pretty rough time because I've been having unusually frequent episodes of psychosis and yeah that interferes a lot with daily functions. It's genuinely really scary (like I don't know why I think/experience things are the way they are, especially when I logically know they aren't/shouldn't be) and even though technically I know what's happening and what I'm supposed to do, I still kinda freak out in the moment. It can be really hard to talk about because first of all, I don't usually know exactly what is going on myself, but also because I'm really scared people will not take me seriously at all anymore. Like, I've seen what just being physically sick can do to people's perception of me, and already have had incidents to do with mental health/neurodivergence too, and it terrifies me to think that people will be able to completely dimiss me as a rational human worth listening to if I let them know how serious what is happening actually is.

Also, Silver, I'm sorry you have to keep things on the down-low. I know how sucky it can be to have homophobic parents, as well as worrying about the stance of a partner's parents and how they may react. It's tough, and I totally get how icky it can feel trying to act like you're "just really good friends" in public. Like it's so hard, especially as a touch-starved child to just not be sweet and cuddly and constantly be at least slightly clingy. Stay strong, hun, things'll get better soon. :/

Wait - please excuse the hyperactivity - but back to the light-hearted stuff --- WHAT IS WRONG WITH US WHY CAN WE ONLY COME UP WITH "hundreds of story ideas [we]'ll never get to use???" Like what do writers who actually write have that we don't? Why can't I just get all of the ideas out that I have in my head into a real, complete story? I literally have one huge, long doc filled purely with bullet-point ideas I want to write (I have a rule that I only write them down if I can fully explain the whole thought process around it in an attached comment, as to not articifially inflated the wordcount) and it's literally longer than anything else I've ever written; literally THOUSANDS of words.... Again, those are only the ones I deem worth writing down. :'(

Yeah, I totally get being upset about the "white washing" essentially of BIPOC characters. By effectively erasing their culturally defining traits and replacing them with whiter features, it feels kinda like they are stripped of the bits that would differentiate them from being just plain white culturally. It does sometimes vicariously(?) bother me when I see tons of mostly exclusively "white" characteristics in other culture's media. Like, I wouldn't go so far as to say it is cultural appropriation, but it kind of feels like the creators are selling their own cultures short in order to appeal and present as more palatable to "white" consumers. That really just is not necesary in my opinion; consumers can take what the creator has to give, including a diversity they may not be used to, or stop consuming said content if it bothers them so much -- they are not going to be appeased even if the other cultures are "watered down," or heck, "toned down" (that's such a gross way of thinking about it -- as if whites are too fragile to be tainted by the 'crassness' other cultures, bleck) for consumers -- that's just harmful.

Going back to the name thing, BB, I didn't mean to imply that you were being judgey or anything. I do get where you're coming from, like if people "steal" your culture's name to be edgey ig, but also see how easily this can be, and has been, twisted by individuals to harm basically anyone/everyone (whites, mixeds, and BIPOCs alike), which makes me a bit apprehensive about being very strongly on either side. Like I don't want to say that using a name like Yuki, even if you're white/passing white, is categorically wrong, but I can completely understand why if someone did believe so and would probably not argue with that choice, especially if it were a person of Japanese descent who held the belief. I guess I feel it's not really my place to judge, seeing as this is not really my strong suit and I actually find it really confusing a lot of the time, but I would be happier if people were not immediately always like "OMG UR CANCELLED CAUSE U LOOK WHITE BUT UR NAME SOUNDS BLACK! THAT'S CULTURAL APPROPRIATION" (again, not saying you are doing that, but if it becomes the norm to call people out like that, it will inevitably happen to people who don't deserve it) but at the same time, some people do need to be kept in check or they would totally take advantage of their priviledge and do just that, so I'm not super sure on where I'm supposed to stand at the moment. I am just interested in what you think.

As for mixed people who may not exactly pass for white, but still have "white traits" that people kinda oggle at for being "exotic," I get that. It sounds like you have it pretty figured out. If it helps, I have some friends with experiences like that that I could share. For instance, one of my very close friends is of direct Guatemalen descent. Nonetheless, she could probably pass as white (people might assume she's southern Italian rather than LatinX) partially because she "acts so white," generally isn't terribly knowledgeable about LatinX culture and doesn't speak fluent Spanish, although her parents do. I have another friend from school who is half-black and looks it (although, admittedly, he does have a pretty light complexion than many others of African descent. I'm thinking the colour of hot chocolate, maybe with a little bit of milk). He has striking blue eyes though, and I know he gets a lot of weird questions about this. (I'm actually a bit guilty for wondering about that, although for the sake of politeness I haven't said/asked anything... :/). I also know a family where the father (who has Latina mother and black father) is not white passing, and is married to a white (but darker-featured) woman. Their first son resembles his father, looking mixed if not POC, while the second one is very white-passing (fair-fair skin, straight blond hair). If the dad and second son are alone in a store, for instance, they kinda get a lot of weird looks and sometimes even racist comments. I've had similar experiences with my mother too, where people assume my brother and I are adopted/one of her white friend's kids cause we're very fair, blond haired and blue/green eyes and my mom is clearly a POC. That happens less with my youngest sister because she's always a little darker although still passing white, but people are still shocked to find out that we are siblings sometimes... I also get questions about my curls, because they don't "look natural," seeing as I have naturally  blonde/now a bit browner hair but the curls are very 'African,' while my sister has slighly darker and more 'European' curls so no-one looks twice. Hasn't been as much of an issue now that I've cut my hair pretty short, though.

OMG WE CAN TRADE BODIES MY DUDE. YOU CAN HAVE THE GREEN EYES AND FAIR SKIN + LIGHT EYES, JUST GET A PERM EVERY NOW AND THEN ITS PERFECT- (well my body is femme, I don't know if u care, but that would be kind of cool. Maybe. Like we both have mobility/health issues, I believe, and I wonder how that would work out. If your brain swapped bodies would we still be 'disabled?' Would we switch issues, or would those stay tied to the brains? Or would they get tweaked for better or worse by the change in brain/body combo??? I'm mostly just messing around and being silly, I don't mean to undermine your identity or traits, by the way or suggest we should actually switch. That was just my first thought when I read you wished you were more 'white' and has the green eyes, because I've always wanted the opposite). On a semi-related note I think this is at least partially why I'm so smitten with avatar-makers. Like. You can so easily create a new "you" you like better/identify more, or switch out a character's eye colour or shape (on a whim, or just to compare, or to explore the 'what-ifs'), or flip their emotional expression with just a couple quick taps. It's literally just so amazing to me and I am obsesseddddd with using those apps/sites.

That whole injecting your own hurt into your characters is such a powerful -- but also sometimes scary -- thing. I'm glad you're thinking so thoroughly about everything and asking questions, seeking out more perspectives. That's always such a lovely thing to see. I wish you the best of luck with your writing, BB! 

Anyways, I'd love to talk more about characters (yours, or just characters in general lol) and story stuff, or if you have any other issues you'd like to talk out, maybe before you include them in your script again. This kind of stuff is literally so fun and exciting for me! I love pontificating, sorry if it's a bit much lol, I'm procrastinating rn...

I really love reading the conversation that you guys have going, it's really interesting :))

BB (is that the preferred nickname? Or should I call you Bobcat?), what you said about mixed character having lighter eyes is so true. I don't mean to derail the conversation, but have either of you ever noticed that some authors (especially YA authors) will tie themselves into knots to give their characters eye colors other than brown? I read a book where the love intrest had lemon yellow eyes! Given, he wasn't exactly fully human, but another book I recently read had a fully human, normal character with 'violet eyes'. Which isn't possible (I guess you could have eyes so blue that they look purplish, but still). This is a little annoying when reading books where the characters are white, but when POC characters that should absolutely have brown eyes start to not have them then it really annoys me. I don't know if either of you are Percy Jackson kids, but in the Heroes of Olympus series five more main characters are introduced, four of them being people of color (two girls and two guys). The guys both have brown eyes but the girls don't, despite them being fully POC. Hazel is black and has gold (??) eyes (I suppose brown eyes can look gold in certain lightings but that's the only color he uses to describe them). And the other girl (Native American) has 'kaleidescope eyes' that change color constantly? It was just weird reading it and having the girl POCs have 'exotic' eye colors while the guy POCs didn't. Maybe I'm reading too much into it? I'm also not sure if either of you have read Keeper of the Lost Cities (ik it's pretty popular on the CB) but the series is set in a utopian society of elves where everyone is said to be infinitely more pretty & beautiful than humans are, and all of them have blue eyes, even the POCs (not that there are that many). It just seems weird to me to assosiate beauty with blue eyes? I really used to love that series when I was younger but when I got a bit older I realized all of the suble undertones (for example being gay is simply not a thing, also she introduced her Asian characters by saying they looked like they 'stepped right out of a K-drama' or smth which kind of annoyed me). Anyway if you couldn't tell this is a rant I go on a lot, but I just wish more authors (and people, really) would get out of the mentality that brown eyes = boring. 

Initially, nounself pronouns confused me too, but they're basically just neopronouns but nouns. I looked into it when I was writing rat/rats/ratself Writing_in_the_dark for my ski lodge, and it's pretty straightforward once you get used to it (although it can sometimes still be confusing for me haha).

I'm soo bad at public speaking. I had to write and give a fifteen minute speech last year and I was sooooo nervous going up to it. Once I was up there it was actually not that bad but I'm sure I sounded pretty robotic.

YES I NEED A PICTURE OF SOPHIE!!! I'll send a picture of my dog Sam when I can- he's a springer spaniel poodle mix, and one of the cutest dogs on planet earth :))) We haven't gotten any snow yet but he loves it when it does snow, even though he gets all wet and gross afterwards.