Please read this!

Chatterbox: Down to Earth

Please read this!

Please read this!

Okay. I don't like when other people enter these kinds of comments, but I think something needs to be said.

The Chatterbox is beginning to creak at the seams. It's still a ways away from falling apart, but that event is coming. New joiners scarcely ever come back, and the subject-pages are clogged and seem to be decaying a little. Why?

Not because of the Politics Thread. Not because of the petty 'wars' that take place every now and again. Not because of differences in views.

It is, in my mind, a result of the new in-flow of personal threads that has been going on for a bit now. This is a very touchy and sensitive subject, and I don't know if I'm really authorized to speak on it, and the Admins shouldn't publish it if it hurts the community. All right.

By personal threads, I mean those threads people start in which they talk about the problems they are having in their lives.

Now let me get one thing straight-- I wholey understand why these threads are made. I get why people want to share their sad experiences with folk they like, but don't really know in real life and will probably never meet. It's not difficult or embarassing to empty your troubles out into the cyber-ears of people you will never see, but who like you and will be happy to condole, empathize, and sympathize with, and encourage, you. With 'real' people, you have to calculate with your real relationships with those people, and also face losing their respect or regard or friendship, or just the embarassment and general discomfort of discussing things like this with them.  I get all of this.

But I think that is not what the Chatterbox is for. It is for writing and reading and for sharing the love of these things, and for the fellowship of people like oneself in a safe, comfortable and free environment. It is the best site for this purpose that I have ever seen. Kids of all ages can feel welcome here, and can interact with others without being condescended to or looked down upon. Or that was how it used to be.  When I first joined, things were brighter and busier. Now they seem to be on the way to stagnation.

People, especially those who are quite young, come here to be happy. They do not come to be battered with everyone's emotional and often 'mature' problems. These problems clog up the site and make especially younger prospective joiners feel unwelcome. It takes from the reading-and-writing aspect of the site, and even occasionally challenges the safety aspect, too.

I know that this is asking a lot, but-- could people perhaps find another place to share their problems? I am aware that this is a readily available place where you stand little danger of being ridiculed or disregarded, where comfort and encouragement is always available, and where you can at last relieve yourself a little of some of the burdens of your life. But that just isn't what the Chatterbox is for.

I'd also remind everyone that, although the CBers here will offer advice, sympathy, and words of cheer there is little we can actually DO for you. I would advise you to take courage and look to the 'real' people in your life, who can really help you. It does no one any good for someone to neglect their relationships wth the people they meet every day, and to pour themselves out into people they will never meet.

Please understand that I am not angry with anyone, that I am in no way attempting to offend or hurt anyone, and that I'm not trying to be a goody-goody. I'm truly sorry if I have caused any damage. Please don't anyone take this wrong!  And Admins, if this thread is publication-appropriate, please give it a chance! 'Bye! :) 

 

Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Esthelle. There are still plenty of writing and book threads on Chatterbox, but let's see if others agree that there are too many personal problem threads.

Admin

submitted by Esthelle (Es-thel-ay, age Anonymous, Rivendell (I wish) ;)
(June 11, 2016 - 3:20 pm)

Shoot, this is turning into an argument. Just so I don't offend anyone, IM NOT TRYING TO OFFEND ANYONE! 

Like Shadow says, I don't see any difference. It's just the same CB. And even if it does slow down I LIKE IT SLOWED DOWN! Also, like Abigail says, its REALLY HARD to try to talk to parents, friends, and siblings. And what if your family is disfunctional, like blank said? Also, CBERS ARE REAL. I said it once, and I'll say it again.

Really, why change it when it's perfect already? CB has always had this, for as long as I can remember. And if we stop the emotional support, it won't be fair for us! If you want to make it for every age, give us our emotional support. The kids don't have to go on DTE. When I just joined here, I only went on Inkwell! For writing. So if you want to write, go on Inkwell! It worked pretty well for me.

submitted by Danie
(June 13, 2016 - 9:33 am)

Well said Shade.  

submitted by Nobody in perticular
(June 13, 2016 - 6:53 am)

So this day got worse. Now I feel like it's half my fault. It's not yours, Esthelle, you were just telling the truth and then I just posted this long rant that nobody needed to hear. I'm just going to go die in a hole now. bye.

submitted by Luna, age 12, Everywhere
(June 13, 2016 - 4:05 pm)

This is not your fault, Luna. You can rant all you want, because you have the right to. Please don't go die in a hole, you did nothing wrong.

submitted by Mei-xue (May-shreh), Fairyland
(June 13, 2016 - 7:27 pm)

*Hug*  Please keep in mind that not everybody agrees with Esthelle on this.  I certainly don't.

 

submitted by ?, age ?, ?
(June 13, 2016 - 7:39 pm)

Luna, no! A ZILLON HUGS ARE CURRENTLY BEING SEND TO YOUR ADDRESS! It's ok! Your'e a human being, as far as I know. Wev'e got emotions. Image result for its okImage result for its ok we are human

submitted by Bibliophile
(June 18, 2016 - 5:36 pm)

I sincerely believe that the CB is not creaking at the seams and have no idea what makes you think that, Esthelle.

 

I think Esthelle was just trying to make her point with that phrase, not meaning literally.

Admin

submitted by Mei-xue (May-shreh), Fairyland
(June 13, 2016 - 8:25 pm)

Okay, I usually won't engage in CB debates, but this hits me hard. 

CBers are real people. On other websites, you can only trust people by oh, 25% to 50%. Here, it's more like 90%.

I mean, what if you have parents that don't understand? What if all your friends shun you out? Here is where people won't judge you. 

Sometimes your closest friends are the ones you don't even know.  

And plus, we're not telling each other everything (our exact location, our real names, etc.)

We're not gullible and naive.  

submitted by The Novelist, The Secret Forest
(June 13, 2016 - 10:55 pm)

Yeah. you just summed it up. *smiles sadly*

Here's where most of my friends are, and now I'm going to go hysterical, just by thinking about it. I love sarcasm. 

submitted by Cho Chang
(June 14, 2016 - 7:54 am)

Not trying to offend anyone, but I feel like this is not something I agree with. At all.

Making the Chatterbox have to be a place where people is constantly happy is actually kinda toxic. It's easiest to open up to people online- what if someone has something really important they need help with, and they can't talk to people they know outside of the internet. Taking baby steps, getting advice, is something they would need. Making it so that that hurting person who needs help has to hang around acting happy is... I don't have enough words to say how bad it is. If you need help, being forced to act happy with friends you desperately want to act truthfully with is painful, and it promotes doing that with off-internet friends and family. What if, of everyone in their lives, the people on the CB are who they feel most comfortable talking about this with? Feeling like they can't talk to them, the people who they are closest with, means they won't want to talk with ANYBODY. I don't know about you guys, but when someone comes to me saying, "I haven't told anybody else yet but I need advice from y'all" I just want to reach through the screen and give them a big hug, and lots of chocolate. I feel honored when somebody comes to me for advice on something so personal- the trust involved is huge. "We may not know your real name or where you live or even what you look like, but we trust you enough to pour out our deepest, most personal problems for you to help us with." That's what people are saying, not "I'm whiny and annoyed and clogging up the CB."

I can still contact friends from the CB through other ways, like Nanomail, but the CB's advice giving system is old, really old, and beautiful. I would be super sad to see it go.

Look. Advice threads on DtE, okay? We can have other threads other places, but don't ban all of these threads where people are trusting you enough to ask advice about important things in your life, just because you dont think it's not 'happy' enough.  

submitted by Indigo
(June 14, 2016 - 8:35 am)

I love you, Indigo. That is the best responce to this thread I have seen. Everybody, listen to her. Let's keep the CB the way it is.

submitted by CaykeTheCook
(June 14, 2016 - 5:59 pm)

Thank you, Indigo and Cayke.

*hugs*

Percisely.  

submitted by Booksy Owly
(June 14, 2016 - 9:10 pm)

YEESSSS!!!! Thank you!

For Merlin's sake. 

submitted by Mei-xue (May-shreh) , Fairyland
(June 15, 2016 - 6:34 am)

*hugs* You explained it well.

submitted by Danie
(June 15, 2016 - 9:15 am)

I think you are exaggerating. Nothing has changed.

submitted by
(June 14, 2016 - 2:35 pm)