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Chatterbox: Down to Earth
ConfessionsC
Confessions
Confess your deepest secrets here, anonymously, if you'd prefer
I won't judge
submitted by Anonymous, age x, x
(October 15, 2020 - 1:43 pm)
(October 15, 2020 - 1:43 pm)
Wow. I... have no clue what to say. Just... I hope it gets better <33 and I'm really sorry about your pets, that must be really hard. *hugs*
Here's a piggy picture, I hope it makes you smile :) they had g i a n t pieces of lettuce yesterday and they looked hilarious XD
(March 24, 2021 - 4:42 pm)
Okay, first off, you've been through a lot. You've had a hard year, and I recommend taking a day - or weekend - off, just to relax, treat yourself, whatever. You deserve it.
Next - I think I may be INFJ as well. I hate socializing, and I go through life like a ghost, but I also feel lost and alone without people to socialize with. Paradoxical, I know, but I think you understand. What I've found helps is, when you find yourself alone, without anyone to talk to, unfocus and relive a happy memory. I can't guarantee it'll work, but I don't have anything else for you. I'm sorry.
Now, the friends thing. A seems a little... off. I dunno what it is. I do know that I've had trouble with those kinds of things, too, though. My best friend since 1st grade abandoned me in 6th grade, and every time I see her, I feel alone, and lost, and nostalgic. Anyway, I went off on a tangent. I think the best thing for you to do is find someone that you really resonate with, in any way. Feeling connected to someone in that way can really help, especially if that person is someone who is similar to you, in some way.
Pets... I have a dog, and I would hate it if he died. Although I don't explicitly know what you're feeling, I sympathize, and I reiterate - you should take a day, or a couple days, off.
(March 24, 2021 - 8:19 pm)
@Wreenoo, Wait What?! I also had a best friend in 1st grade who abandoned me in 6th grade. Werd! (Unfortunately I am in 6th grade now. )
(January 14, 2022 - 11:02 am)
I'm so sorry about your pets, pangolin! That must be really hard for you. <333 I wish I had some good advice for you, but, to be honest, my friend situation isn't much better. I'm positive that things will get better soon, though! I'd suggest maybe reaching out to some people in your class that you don't know too well! It's not easy, but you could realize that someone you thought you wouldn't click with is actually really nice! Also, I agree with Wree. Try taking a day just for yourself! Maybe go for a walk outside, if the weather is nice, or make a cup of tea and read for a while. :) And, don't forget that the CB is always here for you if you need a pick-me-up or just to rant for a bit! *hugs*
(March 24, 2021 - 10:29 pm)
Okay, so I can't relate to much of what you said because I'm homeschooled, and I'm sorry. But losing all those pets must have been SO hard. A few years ago my dog died (I have another dog now.) He was only 3, but he had cancer and he had to be put to sleep. It was probably the hardest time of my life because I was so close to him. I'm really, really, really sorry about your cats and your fish. My best advice would be that it's okay to be sad about your pets dying, it's not dumb or childish, it's perfectly normal. Pets are your friends. Its okay to mourn them. I'm not going to say you think about them less as time passes, because lots of people told me that when my dog died and it isn't true. You will always think about them. You'll get reminded of them almost every day. The thing that time does do is make your thoughts about them less painful. Now, when I look at my dog that I have now lying on her bed, I don't think "Oh, that's where he used to sleep." Instead I think, "Aw, remember that hilarious weird position he used to sleep in?"
(March 25, 2021 - 8:51 am)
I feel like I'm drifting away from the CB.
I don't want to, I love this community and each one of you so much. The crazy, beautiful, and all around incredibleness of this place still puts me in awe, and you all are like people that I dreamed about knowing for my whole life and I finally got to meet. And yet I'm not here as much anymore. If I post once a week, that's pretty record breaking. And when I do come back, it feels like in the one week, everything has changed. The threads that I thought were super promising have sunk, people have left, people have joined, people have gone onto hiatus. There are a few threads I feel interested in, but so many of them are new, and I feel overwhelmed, comment a few times, and leave for another week or two, another week where everyone else gets closer and I feel like I get farther away, so I leave and don't come back for a while again.
I feel guilty, because I'm not honoring my commitments, MWW, cerenthe's Dragon Rider RP, the solo write I started and discontinued almost immediately, various contests and other threads. It doesn't seem fair to all of you.
And then Nerd was chatting with a few of you on some site that I am probably not allowed to name, and you all were saying the sweetest things about me. It actually made me cry because you're all so wonderful and it means so much to me that I matter to these people who matter so much to me, but also because I'm so close from saying that this is all to much and I might leave. I don't know why, it's not as if I love you all any less, or my life is busy, or anything at all. I'm just drifting away, and I don't know why, and I feel so over-dramatic and ranty right now so I'm going to submit now because I just needed to say something. I'm sorry, I probably sound super annoying right now, I just needed to talk some stuff out and get it out of my brain.
(March 27, 2021 - 8:22 pm)
*hugs* I feel the same way, sometimes. That's part of why I never get myself involved in anything here, I'm too scared that I won't end up having enough time/inspiration/whatever. It was actually only a few weeks ago when I didn't post for at least a week. I had other things going on and I just didn't feel like taking the time to come here and have to catch up with everything. But then I got really people-starved and came back XD
You don't need to feel guilty. We understand :) You can be here when you want to but we'll never force you to stay if it doesn't feel right or if you need to focus on other things.
But I do miss seeing you around. You're an amazing person and so creative and kind and I do wish you were here more, but it's totally your choice. <3
(also you're definitely not annoying, ever <3)
(also also I want to know what websiteee but you probably can't say :( )
(March 28, 2021 - 2:05 pm)
Oh, Morning. This is not annoying at all. You are such a wonderful part of the CB for me and it won't be the same without you. I feel close to you and I will miss you so much if you leave. Even thinking about it makes me sad. But if you do decide to leave don't let me hold you back, make the right decision for you.
Don't feel guilty about not committing to the things you joined. It's okay. We understand. We've all been there, it's where I am right now and I can relate to feeling overwhelmed.
Jotting down your feelings and thoughts can help a trememdous amount. It doesn't even have to make sense. If you start to feel really overwhelmed, take a break and spend more time outside or do something you enjoy and find relaxing. Come back when you feel ready for it. We'll be here.
Thank you for telling us this, Morning. I will always be here for you if you ever need me. ♥️
(March 29, 2021 - 10:12 am)
I don't have a lot of time right now, but I agree with everything Peregrine and Starchaser said from the bottom of my heart. You should do whatever feels best, and I don't think anyone really blames you for forgetting commitments, we all do that.
Honestly, the only reason I'm not drifting a bit as well (as in, still on here but not posting several times a day) is because I don't have that many other priority other than school and family stuff, what with covid and my now nonexistent social life...
And your welcome!! I hope we didn't make you feel guilty, we can't help thinking you're as awesome as you are :)
(March 29, 2021 - 3:06 pm)
Pls call me they/them, if that's easier for you! <3 I will still accept she/her as my pronouns, but not as often. Thank you!!! <3
(March 28, 2021 - 5:04 pm)
of course :)
(March 28, 2021 - 9:05 pm)
:D thanks so much :D <3
(March 29, 2021 - 8:16 am)
So uh... Im in fifth grade, and i kinda have a promblem.
SO, there was a boy ima name.. J. One day he told me (all on a email)"Ive had a crush on you since last year" and I was kinda shocked cuz he was making fun of me (with his other friend) that i had a crush on another person, which we were friends but not crushes, however other than that he was really nice. So i told him"I think your nice." Then, it got kinda weird cuz he would email me hearts, and also, one day, I got a email from another of my friends, E. She said that she never knew that I liked J, which is TOTALLY not how the actual conversation went. So I told her" Email me the source u found that out" (I was more secretive, obvoiusly.) and in that email it wuz J telling E how i told him i had a crush on him, which AGAIN, is NOT how it went, and I went rage. AND THEN U KNOW WUT HE ASKS ME TO DO??? "Can you ask E if she likes me?" At this point I was mad at J so i told E " Hey J asked me to tell him if u like him."Then she said" Eh hes funny i guess" So.... now we are friendly but kinda awkward. I just needed to rant I guess, sorry if this is kinda boring. (also my parents said we're at a age where people care too much and overdramatize boys and girls being friends. For the record I actually casually hang out with boys, and I honestly dont get the vibe where ppl melt to jelly when they talk to their crush) AGAIN, SORRY. Thank you
(March 28, 2021 - 6:43 pm)
So I was kinda getting stuck in my head, thinking about this one thing, and feeling sad that I didn't really have anyone I could talk to about it...when I realized I could just write it here! Thanks, CB! Without further ado, what's been on my mind lately...
So, one of my friends, who we'll just call R...doesn't seem like my friend anymore. I actually had/have a crush on them (I've come here before to rant about that actually, heh), which kinda complicates things. I could get into that, but I won't. Basically, they've kind of changed. And now they're basically not texting on our group chat at all. Like not for weeks. One of my other friends, who's actually R's best friend, privately messaged them. R said they didn't want to chat and then ignored their other two messages.
And then, I had this dream last night. R was there and I went to talk to them. The first thing they said was "I don't want to be friends anymore." And I think I said, "Okay, I understand." But then we talked, and laughed, and I still had a crush on them, and it felt like old times.
When I woke up, I felt sad. I didn't understand how I could have said, "Okay, I understand," when I didn't understand. See, I've always read about friends changing and growing apart in middle school. I just never thought it would happen to me. That was just something that happened in books. Through elementary school, friendships were kind of a grade-by-grade thing. I grew apart from friends, and they did the same, and it was normal and we were still friendly to one another.
But this feels different. It really hurts, I guess. A lot more than I expected. And I can't stop thinking about R, now. Are we...not going to be friends? Are they really ghosting me? Is that what this is? Have I done something wrong? Why am I not enough? And why does this feel so different then any other friendship that ended?
I also can't stop thinking about that dream. It almost feels like reality, like R really told me "I don't want to be friends anymore" right to my face.
The crush on them...that was confusing. And painful. This just feels like salt in the wound. I'm getting over my feelings for them, I think, but now we can't even be friends?
Maybe it's not that. Maybe they still want to be part of our friend group and just need some alone time. Maybe something happened and...I don't know. Maybe I only had that dream because I've been overthinking things.
I just want things to go back to the way they were in sixth grade, where I was like, "oh middle school is easy! Those books don't know what they're talking about!" And now I'm afraid that all those books were spot on, middle school is really hard and painful.
It's just making me so sad and angry, I guess.
On a kind of unrelated note, happy relationships are now making me...sad? For instance, in Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts, Benson has a crush on Troy and Troy likes him back and they're happy and la dee da. It makes me happy, but also sad, because I'm angry that real life can't be that perfect, and why does he get to be happy when I'm not?!
Which I know is so unfair! It's kind of silly.
Or, Nico di Angelo. He likes Percy. Percy doesn't like him back. Very sad and painful. I can relate! And then there's Will Solace and he gets to be happy too. And that makes me happy, but also sad because I feel I can't relate as much.
Which is extra ridiculous. I know in the future I'll probably find someone who likes me back! Those are pretty easy problems to get over, I just need to get over myself XD
Okay, that last problem is pretty random and simple, so I guess the main thing I'm coming here for is the thing with R.
That felt good to get off my shoulders, just to write it all out and get it out of my head. Thanks, CB, for having a place for me to do that!
CBers are NOT better therapists than me.
Oh, great, this again.
I'm feeling much better than when I started this. I've basically solved my own problems! Wow! Magic. Anyway, that's all for now!
(April 1, 2021 - 8:42 pm)
I am totally obsessed with the Chatterbox! I literally am on it all day and I post like 1 million times a day.
~That's not really a bad thing!~
Yes it is! She should stop blabbing so much!
~Oh shut up. She can write whatever she wants!~
You two make too much fuss. Calm down, please.
~*Sigh*. I guess you're right, Sam.~
You-Guys-Can-Just-Apologise. You-know-that.
Fine. Jackie, you know I am only apologising because I hate getting screamed at by 5 year olds who know better than me (But-you-know-I'm-right) (Don't interrupt me, Jackie). I'm sorry.
~I guess I'm sorry too, Carla.~
Seriously! AEs, you just made this post like 10x longer than it had to be. *sigh*
(April 8, 2021 - 12:58 pm)